Married To The Mad Vampire Lord-Chapter 131: Fears

"In spite of my better judgment?" He leaned in, dark eyes gleaming. "I want to put a child in you."

Belle closed her eyes, breathing rapidly. She recalled what her instructor in Aragonia had said about not daring to carry his child. He had told her this marriage was not to come with a fruitful seed. But she no longer cared about everything taught to her.

The mere thought of carrying his child made her feel peculiar—not quite disgusted like any human would feel about a night creature’s child, but a strange blend of mortification, excitement, and nervous agitation.

The idea of him imagining her thighs sent a rush of heat spiraling through the place he had awakened in her, and she couldn’t contain the flutter it caused deep inside.

"And you, too," he murmured. "What you’re feeling, the reason you like it when I touch and kiss you—it’s all part of the same thing. It’s natural, Isa."

His voice softened, warm and sure. "Don’t ever let some fools tell you different, or make you feel ashamed of what you feel."

She stared at him breathing rabidly. "I... I can’t breathe properly. I need to sit up," Belle muttered as she pushed herself upright. She felt the air tighten in her chest, and when he moved back to give her space, she sat up quickly.

It was getting hard to breathe with all the feelings stirring inside her, and with him lying so close, she felt enclosed—trapped in a swirl of emotion and uncertainty. Was he saying all this because he had finally decided it was time they did it?

He didn’t stop her from pulling away. He only watched her from where he lay on her pillow, his expression unreadable.

She had not been certain that the very act she dreaded had anything to do with making babies, but now that she thought about it, it made complete sense. It confirmed the suspicions she’d formed after reading that book which spoke of restrained seed. Without a man, a woman could not get pregnant. How ignorant and clueless she’d been.

However, she did not believe she was ready for the act. It was something she had heard more about than she wanted to, and it had put a fear in her mind and heart about consummating. Her body wanted it, but her mind repelled it out of fear.

She made no move to lie down next to him again.

Belle was still sitting upright among the sheets even after a few minutes, where Rohan had wordlessly gripped her hand and was silently playing with her fingers. Her nerves were taut, her heart pounding with anxiety as his gloved fingers swirled around hers. He even brought her hand to his lips and placed a kiss on each of her fingers.

It wasn’t a chaste kiss at all, she doubted if Rohan even had the word chaste in his vocabulary. He put one of her fingers into his mouth, causing her to stiffen, her breath hitching when his warm tongue suckled it, licked it, then suckled it slowly again, drawing it out with an excruciatingly slow pull that sent a hot, trembling wave through her, setting her insides ablaze.

She impulsively pulled her hand back from him but he caught it back and resumed playing with her fingers.

She wished he would just sleep—or that someone would interrupt them and break the long silence that had fallen after his demonstration of making a baby. Where was Cordelia when one needed her to barge in? Perhaps she should leave and let him rest on the bed. He still looked tired and slightly pale. His eyes, for some reason looked more darker and unfocused when she looked at him for a moment.

As much as she would like to be kissed, something told her that if she lay down, it might go far beyond what they had been doing so far.

"I should get up and start preparing for our journey to the castle. I need to instruct the servants on what to pack for us, and also tell Rav to arrange our breakfast. It’s well past morning. You can keep resting, I’ll take care of everything."

Before she could pull away or retreat from the bed, Rohan tugged her hand and drew her down beside him. She let out a soft gasp and tried to quickly pull away and make an escape, but he held her down, not harshly, but with a strength that was firm and unyielding, yet gentle enough not to hurt her.

"Rohan, I need to—"

"Relax," he whispered in her ear, his lips brushing against the shell of it. "I know you’re afraid of me bedding you as my wife. I won’t go that far yet. Don’t move away from me... or try to run."

He stroked her hair softly and tucked a strand behind her ear with quiet tenderness.

"I promise not to go too far," he said, settling back against the pillow and pulling her gently to lie against his front.

His body surrounded hers, a warmth and weight she couldn’t ignore. Her back pressed into his chest, his leg slipped into the curve of her knee. He leaned over, lips brushing against her shoulder, then lower to the side of her neck. The nightdress she wore did nothing to shield her from the heat of his touch.

With slow intention, he slid her sleeve down, baring her skin. His fingers followed the path, gliding over her arm, drifting to her breast. A tremor passed through her.

Behind her ear, where her hairline met skin, his tongue traced a stroke that left her breathless. There was boldness in every touch. Deliberate. Controlled.

"You’re going far..." she whispered, trying to stop him before she lost control herself, with how his taut, bold erection was lightly pressing against her backside. "You promised—"

Rohan stilled. His hand rested gently on her arm. A low sound came from him, something like a groan. He buried his face in the curve of her shoulder for just a heartbeat, then rolled back onto the bed with a sigh.

Belle stared into the dimness of the chamber, relief and disappointment churning in equal measure inside her. She was afraid, not of him, not anymore, but of the act that might lead to her not ever wanting him to touch her or kiss her again. It was said to be painful enough to make you dislike your partner. The way they talked about it was something that would make an unmarried woman not look forward to marriage.

She would rather they do it the other way, with their hands, and perhaps even their mouths, but before she could suggest that, he pulled her to him again. Fierce, protective. He held her tightly, his cheek pressed to her hair, his body solid against her back.

Only then did she realize he had nothing on! He wasn’t wearing his trousers but a brief. The room had been dim, and though she had noticed he wore no shirt, she had not thought he wore no trousers as well.

She felt the full, firm press of his arousal against her, and a shock rippled through her body. ƒгeeweɓn૦vel.com

He relaxed his grip slowly, breathing in deeply as he cradled her again. One of his arms lay beneath her head, warm and steady against her cheek. They stayed like that, suspended between want and restraint.

"Rohan," she whispered.

"Hmm," he hummed softly, his breath warming the shell of her ear. "You don’t like me touching you anymore, wife?" He asked.

Guilt tightened in her chest. She recalled what she’d read in that book. If he had been another man, she doubted if he would ever give her the chance to adjust to the intimacy that comes with marriage like she suspected he had been doing all this while.

If he had forced or pressured her at night, she knew she would have no say and would have done it with him since long ago. But not once had he forced her, even when he was aroused and in need.

Now, she had been the one who pulled away, who tried to protect herself without putting his own feelings in consideration.

Yet he didn’t press her. Didn’t ask for anything. He simply held her.

She knew what she’d done. She was lucky to have him as a husband. He had never hurt her, and no matter how much they said he was a monster, he had, honorable as ever, kept his word about not going far. Even now, with his body aching beside her, he asked for nothing.

And Rohan, for all the chaos in his soul, knew this was the moment his mind would be questioned if anyone could see him now: lying with the woman he craved, aching for her in every breath, and yet refusing to take what was already his.

She was his wife. She was his. But because he sensed her fear, he was holding back. He’d never held back for anyone, not him. He took what he believed was his, even when it wasn’t. When he wanted something, he had it at any time and at any cost.

But when it came to her, it was different. It was like another being inside him, something primal and conflicted, was hellbent on taming him and his impulses. Even though he wanted to force her, something deep inside would always hold him in check.

He held her tighter, breathing in her scent. And unable to bear the wanting, he decided to give in, just in another way. A way to make her lose control, just like he was on the verge of doing himself.

"It’s not as bad as you believe it to be, Isa. I’ll show you," he murmured, voice low and steady. "You just have to tell me when to stop. You say no... and I will."