Living Only For Myself: Make Those Who Hate Me Regret It-Chapter 119: Blushing Is a Natural Reaction, I Can’t Learn It

Chapter 119: Chapter 119: Blushing Is a Natural Reaction, I Can’t Learn It

Xu Su still remembered how this boy had stubbornly insisted on taking her to the school nurse last year.

Xi Zirong’s expression faltered. He asked tentatively, "If I tell you, will you answer my question from before?"

Xu Su nodded. "You go first."

Finding a bench, they sat down. It was a rather secluded spot with no other students around. Xu Su looked at him and arched a brow, urging him on. "No one’s here. Go on, talk."

Xi Zirong paused for a moment, then said, a bit uncomfortably, "During military training."

Xu Su looked surprised. "I don’t think we even talked during military training. The boys and girls were separated, and we were standing far apart. You fell for me back then?"

Her eyes were filled with curiosity, and her question was so blunt that Xi Zirong couldn’t help but turn away to avoid her gaze.

But he felt that wasn’t sincere, so he quickly turned back to face her, his cheeks already burning.

He said seriously, "I noticed you before that. Then you ran over to ask me for a leave of absence. After that... I’m not sure why, but I couldn’t help but watch you. And then when you got sick, I couldn’t resist stepping in. You couldn’t just get by on drinking water."

Xi Zirong’s words were firm and earnest. Listening to him, Xu Su couldn’t help but laugh. She leaned in a little closer. "Love at first sight? Xi Zirong, they say all love at first sight is really just about looks. You must really like my face, huh?"

’So he noticed me even before I asked for that leave of absence.’

Having been teased by her like this several times lately, Xi Zirong wasn’t too flustered, though he still had the look of a virtuous maiden being harassed.

But he didn’t flinch. Instead, he leaned in as well, proactively took Xu Su’s hand, and declared with a perfectly candid expression, "I do. It’s not just your face. I like everything about you."

More than a decade later, a saying would become popular online: love at first sight is more reliable than love that develops over time. The idea was that for someone you fell for at first sight, even if time passed and the relationship fell apart, if you could set aside all your grievances and look at them anew, your heart would still skip a beat.

Xu Su: ...

She felt like the tables had turned and he was teasing her.

Xi Zirong squeezed her hand and asked, "Your turn to answer, Susu. What do you like about me? And when did you start liking me?"

The boy’s face was still a little flushed, his eyes now filled with anticipation.

"..." Stared at like that, Xu Su felt an unfamiliar sense of unease.

She reached out and covered Xi Zirong’s face with her hand. "Don’t be so close to me, and stop looking at me like that."

Xi Zirong was remarkably obedient. He reined in his intense gaze and sat up straight, then pressed, "Go on, Susu. Don’t try to get out of it."

"..." Xu Su paused for a moment. ’Is it really a good idea to admit I have such a weird fixation?’

Xu Su hesitated for a long while before finally saying, "Well... the way you blush is pretty adorable."

"...?" Xi Zirong was taken aback. "What?"

Xu Su shot him a look and said, full of confidence, "You don’t know how easily you blush? I find it fascinating. Plus, you’re ridiculously good-looking, so I can’t help but want to tease you."

Xi Zirong hadn’t expected that answer. His expression flickered through a series of emotions before he finally asked, "So that’s why you always tease me? Susu, do you have a thing for being a bully?"

The "bully" he was referring to was, of course, the type you see in TV dramas—those arrogant scoundrels who harass innocent young women on the street.

Xu Su pouted and mumbled, "I don’t just tease anyone, you know. Xi Zirong, I only like seeing *you* blush. I don’t like anyone else."

’Why would I tease anyone else, when I only want to tease you?’

"..." Xi Zirong looked at her, feeling like something was off about her logic.

A top student was a top student for a reason; he knew how to grasp the main point. He said, "Blushing is a natural reaction. I can’t just learn to do it. Is there anything else you like about me? Susu, tell me something I can work on to improve, okay?"

’Why is he so hung up on this...’

’Trying so hard to improve just so I’ll like him more...’

Xu Su was speechless for a moment. "You’re perfectly fine just the way you are. You don’t need to work on anything. Xi Zirong, don’t be so insecure."

*Don’t be so insecure.* Xu Su had said those words to him a long time ago.

Hearing her say it again now made Xi Zirong freeze for a moment. "I’m not being insecure. I just want you to like me a little more. I always feel like your feelings for me are too shallow, that I’m still not good enough."

’How is that not being insecure?’ Xu Su sighed to herself. ’His language arts grades are so good; how can he not understand something so simple?’

’He’s only trying so hard to win more of my affection because he’s insecure about this relationship.’

Xu Su’s heart ached at his insecurity. She reached out, pulled the boy a little closer, and said with great solemnity, "I like you exactly as you are right now. The current you is the one who makes my heart go soft. Xi Zirong, you’re wonderful. You don’t need to change a thing, and you don’t need to try so hard. Understand?"

This was the first time in two lifetimes that Xu Su had ever confessed her feelings to someone. Her earnest, solemn attitude made it impossible for Xi Zirong to hide his smile.

The smile was still clearly visible on the usually cool and detached boy’s face all the way back to the classroom.

And after this heart-to-heart, Xi Zirong was finally able to shake off the constant sense of crisis he felt about their relationship. He even became a little more patient when explaining problems to Wu Qianqian.

Before, he had always felt that Xu Su didn’t care about him, which was why she was okay with him tutoring other girls. He could be giving someone a private tutoring session, and Xu Su wouldn’t even once turn her head to look.

Judging her by his own standards, Xi Zirong knew he could never let Xu Su study alone with another boy. He couldn’t do it. The mere thought sent a blaze of anger through his chest.

But after Xu Su’s sincere confession, Xi Zirong told himself that everyone loves differently. Maybe Xu Su just wasn’t the type to get worked up over such little things.

As a result, he no longer wore a grim-faced expression while tutoring Wu Qianqian. And while his attitude couldn’t be called great, it was at least calm and composed.

Wu Qianqian’s grades also shot up at a visible rate. She could now handle the vast majority of test papers from her various teachers with ease.

Xu Su was very gratified to see her progress and would often fetch water for the two of them during breaks in their evening self-study session.

Many students in their class were puzzled by the strange dynamics of their study group. 𝐟𝐫𝕖𝗲𝘄𝚎𝗯𝕟𝐨𝕧𝐞𝚕.𝕔𝕠𝐦

In fact, because Xu Su rarely participated when Xi Zirong tutored Wu Qianqian, most of their classmates assumed the study group only consisted of Wu Qianqian and Xi Zirong, with Xu Su not being involved at all.

If it weren’t for the fact that Xi Zirong still came and went with Xu Su every day and ate with her, rumors would have likely started spreading that he had fallen for someone else and broken up with her.

Time flew by, and by the end of January, the weather had become brutally cold.

During the evening self-study session, Xu Su took all three of their water bottles to get them refilled with hot water.

On her way back, she happened to run into Qian Jia. For some time now, their group of three hadn’t been eating or studying together. What with that and having little time to chat in their dorm before lights-out, Xu Su hadn’t had a proper conversation with Qian Jia in ages.