To Byul (Omegaverse)-Chapter 74: Get out of my head

Yun-tae arrived in his dorm room. It looked like his roommate was in the shower because of all the water splashes he was hearing coming from the bathroom.

He stared at the ceiling as he recalled his question,

"What is love?"

He closed his eyes and placed his hand on his chest, unsure if he was really in love with Kang-woo, as he believed he was, or if it was just a sugar rush clouding his thinking and blinding his eyes.

"I don't believe it." He muttered and covered his face with his arm. "I don't want to believe it. But... What do I feel love is?"

Meanwhile, Kang-woo was punishing himself by bathing in cold water in such a cold season. He let the cold water pour down from the shower, seeping through all of his pores and making him shiver.

He wanted his head clear but more than that, he wanted to calm his heart.

The Doctor had told him that just taking the suppressants wouldn't do much, if he really wanted it to be effective, then he had to be under cold water. That way, it would calm his mind and his heart.

Even if he didn't get calm, the cold seeping into him would take his mind off any conflicting emotions, and he would be able to think rationally.

It was a harsh method and he could even get sick, but that was the only way to calm his unstable emotions.

His red pheromones were slowly seeping out of him. In a way, escaping his cold body and fading into oblivion. This method sure was effective but if he tried it too often, he could put himself in danger.

He stroked his hands over his body as the water splashed down and then stopped at his left abdomen. There was a scar there. A surgery scar that was yet to regain the color of his natural skin color, and it looked like it never would.

That was proof that he had been to death's door and back, keeping his life and loving a few more years to be with Chin-Hwa.

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He sighed.

It was also the reason why he was so desperate to leave Chin-Hwa without telling him anything about it.

Kang-woo got out of the shower with his towel wrapped around his waist and s small towel on his head, but when he entered his room, he saw Chin-hwa sitting on his bed with a smirk on his lips.

He was stunned at first but realized it was his mind playing tricks on him.

"What's wrong, Byul?" The hallucination asked. "Don't you want to come play with me? You know you want to." He laid on the bed and spread his legs. "My body is all yours anyway."

Kang-woo shut his eyes and shook his head.

"Get out of my head!" He commanded. "He's isn't that shameless."

He opened his eyes and once again found himself alone in the room. Why was he having such shameless hallucinations of Chin-hwa?

Right now, he wasn't even planning on looking at him because of what he said about Ji-hoo. Truth was... He just couldn't accept the fact that Chin-hwa finally decided to settle down with a boyfriend. And one who he had been weary of entirely.

Why was the universe testing him?

The thought of Chin-hwa hugging and kissing another man that wasn't him, getting on top of the bed and spreading his legs equally with pleasure in his eyes, but all for another man... They got him enraged.

He couldn't bear to think of it and felt he would die if he ever came across such a scene. Chin-hwa did not belong to him, yet he wished he did.

Every morsel and ounce of that fragile body of his, his smile, his lips, his eyes, and even his cute little face... He wished it all belonged to him and he had the right to do whatever he wanted with him.

But wishes weren't so easily granted. If they were, Chin-hwa would be in his arms at that moment, and he wouldn't need to keep making wishes.

"I'm losing my mind." He exclaimed, sitting on the bed as the towel on his head slipped down. "Hwa, what do I do?" He asked and raised his gaze. "What do I do to get over this trial?"

At the same time, Chin-hwa sat by his study table, his hands scribbling away on his jotter as he memorized materials from his textbook. He'd stroke a few red, stroke a few yellow and most of them were on green.

It was his study pattern, hoping to understand the red lines better and look through the yellow at a later time.

He did this for a few more minutes but then stopped and sighed. He raised his head, looking up at his ceiling in silence, and then dropped it, turning his head to look at the kitty cat on his lamp table.

Yeah, he did not throw it away. He wanted to, hoping he could prove that he did not need anything from Kang-woo and was mad at how he behaved towards Ji-hoo, but... He was still his long-time best friend.

Something petty like that should not make him throw out a gift from him.

Even if they couldn't be lovers in this life, at least, they could still stay friends, right? And he would get to see his face every day, so long they had classes together.

"But... What were you thinking, Kang-woo?" He muttered. "Why go through all that trouble to get me one when I said I didn't need it?"

It was as if he listened to Chin-hwa's heart rather than his mouth because he had liked the kitty cat from the moment he laid eyes on it and wanted it, but decided to give up since Yun-tae equally liked it.

He already has a few plushies, so why not give up this one? He asked himself and that was what he did.

But Kang-woo could not simply accept that fact and decided to get the same for him as well. He even went through the trouble of printing his name on it.

Chin-hwa rested his head on his desk, his eyes still fixed on the kitty cat.

"Just what goes through your mind, Kang-woo? I really... Want to know."

On that night, these three had one question that plagued them. Three different questions that could impact a lot on their lives once the answer was presented before them, changing the course of things completely.

But these three questions had answers that only they could search for before finding. So, this was the trial they stood to face. Alone.