The Lycan king-Chapter 123

I wanted him to know everything but I hated that I was going to be the one to do it. I knew how much Claire meant to him and this was hurting me as much as it would hurt him.

He was going to lose his entire family in one go and I was the reason. I was basically ruining his life. I wished there was a way I could go back in time and change our fate. This was the price we had to pay for mating. I hated it. 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝙚𝙬𝓮𝙗𝒏𝙤𝒗𝙚𝙡.𝒄𝒐𝓶

"Oh babygirl, stop crying." Bethany said as she rubbed my back. I didn’t even notice when the tears began to fall. "It’s not going to happen again. We’re here now and we’ll protect you. We would go shopping for baby items when we get back."

"I don’t want to go shopping." I said as she pulled away from me. My baby cooed softly followed by a loud cry. I could hear the guys fighting outside and my heart squeezed. "I need to feed him now." I announced as I lifted my shirt up and popped my breast out of the bra I was wearing. I had unhooked the hook of the bra a long time ago because it felt like constraints but I was scared of what Luke might do so I kept them on.

I cradled him and placed my nipple on his mouth, praying that this would do smoothly. There was no reaction as he kept on crying.

"Baby, mum’s here. You just need to eat." I said as I pushed my nipple into his mouth but he just carried on with his tears. I looked up at Bethany and she had an expectant look in her eyes. "He’s not latching on. He’s not feeding." I cried out. Maybe he would be able to eat if Claire had just let me feed him from the start.

I noticed movements at the door and Jax walked in. There was a glint of happiness in his eyes as he saw me and the baby but he scanned my face and it faded away.

"What happened?" He asked me and I looked away. I pulled my baby off me and pushed my shirt down. This was too embarrassing. I had only been a mother for a day and I already felt like a disappointment. My baby didn’t want to feed. I patted his back softly to stop him from crying. "Leo, what’s wrong. Tell me."

"He’s not latching on. I don’t know what to do." I admitted to him. He stretched out his hand and I handed the baby over to him. His cried subdued and it made me feel worse.

"How about we go home, take a nice warm bath and we’ll look for a solution together." Jax offered and I looked away. What other solution was there? I wanted to feed my baby. I wanted to know that I was capable of taking care of him.

"Here. I saw this in a corner." Bethany said as she handed a cloth to me. She gestured towards my waist and I looked down at the skirt I was wearing. There was blood on it and I sighed. I took the cloth from her and wrapped it around my waist. I looked at Jax, who was watching me with pity in his eyes.

"They’ve captured Luke and they’ve taken him back to the pack. The other guys are waiting for us to leave the hut so that they can take Claire." Jax said sand I nodded. I felt so numb. It was like I wasn’t here. There was nothing I could do other than nod my head and agree to whatever they wanted. "Hold the baby and I’ll carry the both of you home." Jax handed him over to me and he began to cry. Before I could react, Jax swept me off my feet and carried me out of the hut. I closed my eyes to shield me from the bright sunlight.

I could hear some men saying a couple of things but I didn’t want to focus on them instead I rested my head on Jax’s chest and I patted my baby, who wouldn’t stop crying.

"My Leo. I’m so happy that you’re safe. I promise you. It’s still us, including our baby, against everything. I love you so much." Jax muttered just for my hearing and I finally broke down.

Leonora*

I laid down in the bathtub staring at the ceiling. It had been over a month since I had a nice bath. The water felt good on my skin and I felt so tired, sleep deprived even. Jax was with our baby seeing as he didn’t want to be held by me. Anytime I tried to feed him, he cried out. We resorted to spoon feeding him a cup of warm milk.

After Jax got a hang of feeding him, I left them to have a bath. I don’t want to be around the both of them. It felt insulting that my baby didn’t want to be with me. He didn’t want to latch and certainly didn’t want to be held.

My mind went over to the birth of my son. I was so happy that Meredith found me because I didn’t know what would have happened. I wasn’t strong enough to give birth to my baby on my own.

"Baby." I heard Jax call but I didn’t answer. "How are you?" He asked but I didn’t say anything. There wasn’t anything to say. "Can we join you?" I opened my eyes and looked at him with a frown. He was holding our baby and I sighed. Was there a way I could get rid of them?

"Okay." I said, contradicting myself. I got up from the bath and Jax stepped in. He sat down and laid on the bath, holding our baby up in the air. I sat in between his thighs and he brought his arms around me, holding the baby in front of me. "Jax, hold him. He doesn’t want me."

"He would have to get used to it." He joked but I didn’t laugh. There wasn’t anything funny about the situation. "I actually think he wants you." He said as he held him to my chest. Our baby tossed a bit and settled down. "See, he needs his mum."

I lifted my hands and gently cradled him. Jax slowly took his hands off and our baby didn’t cry this time.

"I think he could sense that you weren’t feeling good." He said and I nodded. Maybe he could sense it. "You can rest on me and try feeding him again." I didn’t add any bath bomb into the bath water. It was just plain water so I could definitely try feeding him again.

I laid my back on Jax as I placed my nipple in his mouth again. I waited for a minute but nothing. "Jax, he’s not- oh." I was cut off when I felt him suckle. A deep smile hit my face. I turned to look at Jax and he had a smile on his face.

"I told you." He said and he placed a kiss on my forehead. I laid back and let him feed until he got tired.

"Are we going with the name Alexander?" I asked Jax as I cuddled my baby. "I don’t want to give him a name you don’t like."

"How about just Xander? I think I prefer it." He said and I nodded. "One day, we’ll have our baby girl Nora." He said and I nodded. I didn’t want to let him know that I wasn’t sure I wanted another child. This experience had left a scar inside of me that I wasn’t sure if I’ll be able to get over.

I was bleeding profusely and had to heal myself. I could still feel the after effects of the healing and I definitely wasn’t strong enough.

"I’m just happy you’re back." He said as his hands rubbed my arm slowly. "I wanted you and Bethany to go to the apartment for a short while. Would you want that?"

"No." I responded. I didn’t want to go anywhere. I just wanted to stay here with Jax and my baby. I had already been away from Jax for so long. I didn’t think I would be able to do it again.

Okay. I’ll get Bethany and Micah to follow me to city to get baby things." He said and I turned around so that I could look at him. I knew he was trying to be optimistic for me but I didn’t want that. I just wanted him to be there. There was already so much pressure.

I don’t want you to go." I told him and he frowned. Xander needs us and I didn’t want him to run off to the city

Then what’s the problem. We need to get things for our baby and I wanted you to pick it out and you’re saying no." He started. Tears gathered in my eyes and he pulled me for a hug, carefully avoiding Xander who was basically sleeping.