The Artist Who Paints Dungeon-Chapter 294

The incident began three days before the parade.

“...The parade?”

“Yes.”

“He wants to?”

“Yes.”

“Why would he... do that?”

Seo Seo-hee, happily eating a bulgogi lunchbox, ended up receiving what was less of a notice and more of a declaration from Sergio.

“I don’t know much about this, but was the teacher ever a curator at the Collector’s Guild?”

“I also do that on the side.”

“How in the world did you end up doing that on the side? Should I report this to the Labor Office?”

“Does that even still exist?”

“That remark really makes you sound like an old man. Hardly anyone agrees with my Labor Office jokes unless they’re my friends.”

Indeed, the Labor Office no longer existed in this world.

“Instead, the Association has taken over that role.”

“Is there anything the Association doesn’t do?”

“No. If it disappeared, the country would collapse, so they pretty much do everything now. Tragic, right? Please be kind—we’re suffering here.”

“I already see you kindly.”

Kang Eun-seong, who had been listening from the assistant seat, thought:

‘I want to plug my ears.’

A strapping middle-aged man, 187 cm tall, whining like a child, and a slightly more strapping young man pampering him—knowing the context didn’t make the situation any less uncomfortable.

Even as Kang Eun-seong quietly resigned himself, the conversation continued.

“I thought I couldn’t avoid participating in this event.”

“I didn’t think you had this side to you, teacher.”

“What kind of person did you think I was?”

“Hmm... Someone who likes quiet, who’s gently affectionate?”

Thwack—!

A mermaid tail burst out from Sergio’s shadow and slammed the floor.

“......”

“...Was that mermaid just scolding me?”

“She says not to say ridiculous things.”

“Oh....”

Seo Seo-hee looked a little flustered.

“Ah, was I wrong...? You have a calm and soft-spoken image....”

THWACK—!!!

“You seem like someone who prefers reading books alone rather than being with people....”

THWACK THWACK THWACK—!!!

“I don’t know what happened between you two, but I’m the one who’s sorry, so could you please stop punishing the innocent floor? We just had it redone recently.”

At that, Sergio gently coaxed the mermaid tail back into his shadow. The gray, rippling thing seemed to grumble a bit, then vanished entirely. Disappeared somewhere.

It looked just like a child sulking, and Seo Seo-hee gave an awkward smile.

“...I think I made a huge mistake.”

“Of course I’m the quiet, gentle priest who likes peace and kindness.”

“Yeah, I really screwed up.”

It was a statement far from someone who liked quiet. Even without knowing his nickname—the smiling tyrant of the seaside village—Seo Seo-hee found himself nodding in understanding. He felt like he’d glimpsed a hidden side behind the kind smile.

“So, what exactly is your role? I heard the Collector’s event starts at dawn. There are booth staff selling snacks, PR roles, safety personnel...”

“I’ll be at the snack booth, to start with.”

“I thought there might be cases where people do multiple roles. But then that means... you’re doing something else too in this parade, right? Is it what I think it is?”

“It’s exactly that.”

Sergio said proudly.

“Come and watch.”

“What the hell have you prepared that you’re this confident?”

“I’ve always been full of confidence.”

“That much, I already knew...”

People who lacked confidence didn’t bring six-tiered lunchboxes daily. Especially not to a random guild with whom they had no real ties. Especially not to its guildmaster.

Then Sergio handed him a pamphlet.

“I’m in here.”

“Ah, let’s see....”

Seo Seo-hee fell silent for a moment.

“...?”

“Yes, go ahead. I’m listening.”

“Unless my eyes are failing me, these are waterbirds?”

“It’s the Waterbird Corps.”

“Ah-ha....”

Seo Seo-hee slowly nodded.

“Yeah, maybe it is time to reset Korea.”

“Why are you starting to sound like Yoo Seong-woon?”

“Isn’t this Noah’s Ark? Just wash it all away with water?”

“I’m not that extreme.”

“I don’t know why you’re embarrassed, but okay.”

“Thank you for the compliment.”

Anyway, Sergio had invited his student.

“Come visit. I’ll play with you.”

“Oh... Thanks, but... Aren’t I a bit old for that?”

“Are you saying that to me?”

“I’m sorry.”

Realizing it could sound like a jab at an older teacher, Seo Seo-hee quickly apologized. Thankfully, Sergio let it slide. Meanwhile, Kang Eun-seong, listening to the whole exchange, had already collapsed in exhaustion.

Sergio then invited other students too.

“If you have time, bring Hae-Woon with you.”

“Ah, bring him? And Hae-Woon? Of all people?”

“Yes, that’s right. Guildmaster Jeong Hae-Woon.”

“Don’t pretend to be distant with the title now. Is there a reason?”

“Hm, let’s see.”

Sergio replied flatly.

“If I’m right, the student making the most foolish mess because of my appearance is Hae-Woon.”

“...Oh...”

“That kid Jeong Hae-Woon was never that virtuous. I just wanted to talk to him before he jumps to conclusions and messes everything up.”

“......”

“Am I wrong?”

Seo Seo-hee quietly promised to drag him along.

***

And so, he was dragged along.

“Whose side are you even on?”

“I’m on Earth’s side.”

“So what, I’m not? Am I some alien from a distant planet?”

“Let’s not be narrow-minded and assume aliens can’t be on Earth’s side.”

“Fuck off, of course they’re on their own planet’s side. You’re seriously pissing me off. What’s wrong with you?”

Jeong Hae-Woon grumbled while Seo Seo-hee smiled vaguely.

“You were making a mess, though.”

“Then why are you taking it out on me?”

“Because you’re the only one who’ll put up with me, Jeong Hae-Woon.”

“That was bone-chillingly gross.”

“Impressive, right?”

“Fuck you.”

As Jeong Hae-Woon recoiled, Seo Seo-hee shrugged.

“Still, it’s good to see your face again.”

“I’m incredibly uncomfortable.”

Jeong Hae-Woon had reverted to his younger face.

“Well, yeah. I made it so people wouldn’t recognize me, so what’s the point of leaving a few wrinkles? My face needs to relax sometimes too.”

That was why such high-profile figures could walk around in public. They were under a magical perception block. Even if they were “Symbols of Eternity,” they needed time off.

Well, actually, it wasn’t that they needed rest—it was that Earth was so unstable, they were always working. So this was a deliberate moment of respite.

“Did we need to come this early, though?”

“Well... Sergio Hunter said he’d be selling in the morning.”

“Fuck this. Can’t I just go home?”

“Nope, you already promised. No backing out.”

“You son of a bitch...”

You couldn’t break a promise with a mystery being. Even if the one who made it wasn’t present. Knowing the danger of such beings, Jeong Hae-Woon grumbled but went along obediently.

And then, they faced Sergio Hunter selling expertly crafted cube steak.

“......”

“......”

Jeong Hae-Woon fell silent for a while.

“...I’m sorry, but what are you selling right now, teacher?”

“Oh, you’re already calling me teacher? I didn’t expect that. I’m touched.”

“No, I don’t mean that teacher. Anyway, what are you selling?”

“I’m selling beef cube steak.”

“I’m sorry, but not all beef is equal, and not all meat is meat, you know?”

This crazy mystery being was selling god-knows-what mystery.

“The Collector allowed this?”

“It’s delicious and hygienic.”

“That’s not the issue!”

“Are you from the FDA?”

“I’m losing my mind here.”

He seriously considered shutting the whole event down.

But Jeong Hae-Woon and Seo Seo-hee were each handed a cube steak and promptly kicked out. There were too many people in line.

Jeong Hae-Woon only acknowledged its safety after stealing Seo Seo-hee’s and eating it.

“...So it is real food.”

“Why’d you eat mine?”

“Royal taster, you bastard.”

“Then eat your own now.”

“You’re rich—don’t tell me you’re stingy?”

Amazingly, it really was food.

‘...Was it too smothered in mystery for me to recognize? Or was it just that close to actual food? Either way, it doesn’t seem harmful...’

There were none of the usual mystery-related side effects. No otherworldly transformations or sudden dimension shifts. It was just food.

Perfectly refined. 𝗳𝚛𝗲𝕖𝚠𝚎𝚋𝗻𝗼𝕧𝗲𝐥.𝚌𝚘𝐦

‘This is the first time I’ve seen a mystery this well-controlled...’

He was surprised—but slightly relieved.

“...It’s good.”

“Seeing it for yourself now?”

“Glad to know your eyeballs haven’t turned into knot-holes.”

“Just because you speak politely doesn’t make your words any kinder, Mr. Jeong Hae-Woon.”

“Guess you’re not a relic just yet...”

“When I retire, who’s going to replace me?”

“Definitely not me.”

“...Seriously.”

Clicking his tongue, Seo Seo-hee asked:

“So, now that you’ve seen it?”

“It’s impressive.”

Jeong Hae-Woon frowned.

“Too skilled.”

That was what shocked him most.

‘How deeply does he understand humans?’

Of course, there was still a strong sense of unease. If he felt it, average people must’ve wondered if this thing was really human.

And yet, despite that, it blended in flawlessly.

A mystery being, selling street food. Words failed.

If it understood humanity that deeply and stayed within harmless limits...

‘...The Collector won’t let it cross the line anyway. Bisa Beul may be eccentric, but he’s not the type to destroy the Earth. They’ll take precautions.’

Then maybe... they could keep watching for a while.

“You were just thinking, ‘Maybe we can watch for a bit,’ weren’t you?”

“Spot on.”

Jeong Hae-Woon nodded.

“Maybe it’s time we ended this friendship.”

“Have you considered who’d suffer more from that?”

“People deserve to see this side of you.”

“Says the pot to the kettle?”

“...Anyway, yeah.”

He clicked his tongue again.

“I get what he’s trying to show us.”

That damn “Sergio Hunter” explained everything with just that silly appearance.

Understanding humans deeply enough to sell food on the street. Blending in his unnatural vibe as hunter’s intimidation. Using a mystery as food without causing harm or panic.

As a gardener, Jeong Hae-Woon had to acknowledge it.

“At the very least, he won’t make a mistake.”

“The problem is when he does something on purpose.”

“And you keep trusting that kind of being.”

They could trust he wouldn’t cause disaster by mistake. But that was only half the trust.

There was no guarantee he wouldn’t intentionally bring disaster.

“Why do you trust him?”

Because of that damned teacher title?

“Teacher, huh. Nice title.”

“You’re doing that annoying thing again.”

“Sure, ‘teacher’ sounds nice, but in the end, he was just a colleague. Not family. Just some guy. That’s why we forgot him. If it was truly precious, why would we make that choice?”

“Maybe because Earth was that precious to him.”

“Bullshit. I never had that kind of chivalry.”

Jeong Hae-Woon knew himself. He wasn’t like Seo Seo-hee, the model student loved by every teacher. He’d started drinking and smoking in middle school. Hated everything. Adults were all liars. Life pissed him off.

“You know it too.”

He frowned.

“You guys are all I had.”

“......”

Seo Seo-hee nodded.

“Sorry, but that’s a bit much.”

“Fuck off.”

“It’s not like I haven’t thought the same.”

“So... what conclusion did you reach?”

“That maybe something justified it?”

Even he had to admit Jeong Hae-Woon was probably right.

Back then, he wasn’t as composed as he was now. It wasn’t just him. They all hated and distrusted the world except for each other.

No way he’d have agreed to forget something precious “to save the world.”

“...Yeah, that couldn’t be it.”

Seo Seo-hee admitted.

But ★ 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ★ that gave them an answer.

“It must’ve been something they couldn’t endure otherwise.”

“Like what, exactly?”

“Maybe someone got seriously hurt. Maybe things got so bad they couldn’t undo it. I don’t think we were ever that altruistic or noble back then.”

“So our selfishness led to that decision?”

Jeong Hae-Woon snorted.

“Then that teacher of ours got used by it, huh?”

“That’s why I always feel guilty.”

“Which makes me trust him even less.”

His face twisted.

“How can we be sure we didn’t do something terrible to him? Hell, maybe we killed him. What if that being’s real goal is revenge?”

“If he brings disaster out of anger, we’ll have to deal with it regardless. Only a handful on Earth could stop a mystery like that. Even if it’s ungrateful, what else can we do?”

Seo Seo-hee stabbed another steak cube with his fork.

“But aren’t you curious?”

“Sounds like bullshit, but go on.”

“What if we had remembered him all the way through?”

“Well...”

“What kind of adults would we have become?”

“......”

Jeong Hae-Woon didn’t answer.

Even after finishing that tiny paper plate—he remained silent for a long time.

***

Jeong Hae-Woon’s favorite food was beef cube steak.

In that worthless beggar family of his, beef wasn’t common. He didn’t have the class to cut and eat it delicately either. So a dish where you could just poke and eat—tasty, pretty, satisfying texture...

“......”

Thick-cut. Strong pepper scent.

“......”

He thought he’d discovered that taste after becoming an adult.

After the world stabilized, when he could finally afford to eat beef as he pleased—he thought that’s when he realized it.

But he couldn’t quite remember when that had been.

“Hm...”

Jeong Hae-Woon stared down at the empty plate.

“...Not bad.”

“All done?”

“Yeah.”

That was all.

But he meant it—it was good.