Modern Family: New Life-Chapter 111: The kiss II

As Claire left the living room trying to stifle her laughter, Gloria walked over to Cam and helped him back onto the couch.

"Oh, Cameron, what happened? One moment you were standing there, and the next all we could see were your shoes," said Gloria as she started pulling chips out of his hair.

Andrew, Pippa, and the others bent down to pick up the scattered snacks from the floor.

From his seat, still slightly disheveled, Cam took a deep breath and declared, "Do you want to know what happened?"

He raised his hand dramatically, pointing at Mitchell.

"Mitchell is embarrassed to kiss me in front of other people."

"That's not exactly true! You ambushed me!" Mitchell defended himself.

Just then, Claire returned with a cloth and a small bucket, "It's not personal, Cam. In high school, Mitchell dated Robin Schiller and never kissed her either."

"That was because I was gay!" protested Mitchell, turning toward his sister.

"And what's your excuse now?" asked Cam, without missing a beat.

An awkward silence fell for a second, until Gloria spoke up again.

"It's not Mitch's fault, Cam. He learned it from his father," she said, pointing directly at Jay, who stood in the corner of the living room, a string of shoes hanging around his neck, staring at the floor like it was the most fascinating thing in the world.

"Jay isn't affectionate in public either," Gloria added, shrugging.

Jay looked up, offended. fɾēewebnσveℓ.com

"I can't believe you're attacking me," Jay replied, spreading his arms.

"I've got shoes hanging around my neck. And for nearly half an hour I yelled at your meat to scare off death. What more do you want from me?"

With that, he ceremoniously took off the shoes and dropped them on the floor.

"Don't you see? It's your fault your son can't kiss his lover in public!" said Gloria, raising her voice.

"Don't say lover."

"We don't like the word lover."

Cam and Mitch said almost in unison.

Jay, raising one hand as if calling for a ceasefire, said, "Can we just end this now and keep eating our ice cream in silence?"

"No! Tell Mitch it's okay to kiss Cam in front of you. Just say it," Claire insisted.

"Why do we have to do that?" asked Jay, exasperated and confused.

Meanwhile, on the couches, Andrew, Pippa, Manny, Alex, Haley, and Luke watched the scene as if it were a play.

Their eyes followed each adult in turn, hanging on every line as they enjoyed their ice cream along with the free show.

"We don't have to," said Mitch, arms crossed, shaking his head. In this situation, he was on his father's side.

"Of course we don't," said Cam from his seat, clearly sarcastic.

"Sorry for not wanting to make out with you in front of the whole family," said Mitch, his patience wearing thin.

"Don't apologize," said Jay, as if giving him his blessing and confirming it wasn't necessary to do any of this.

"No. Gloria's right," said Claire, still meddling and staring straight at Jay.

"Dad, the fact that you're emotionally closed off makes it harder for your kids to show affection."

"Really?" Jay asked, locking eyes with Claire.

"Yes," Claire replied, confidently.

"Has it been hard for you to show affection in public places?" Jay pressed.

"Yes," Claire repeated, trying to sound just as confident.

"You?" Jay asked again, like he needed to be absolutely sure.

"Yes..." Claire answered, her voice dropping slightly.

Jay paused for a beat, then fired back, "Was that before or after the police brought you to my doorstep wearing nothing but underwear and a blanket they gave you?"

Claire's eyes widened.

"Oh my God!" Haley exclaimed, jumping up from the couch, "I knew it! I knew you weren't some saint," she added with a victorious tone.

She'd always been suspicious of her mom's supposedly spotless high school record.

"You got arrested?" Alex asked, sounding scandalized and glaring critically.

"Amazing," Luke muttered, clearly impressed.

"It's not amazing! And no, I wasn't arrested! Your grandfather is joking," Claire shot back immediately.

"Yeah, of course. Just a joke," Jay said with a fake smile... that didn't convince anyone.

Then, under his breath, he whispered to Claire, "I've got a million of those."

Claire glared at him.

But before the topic could die, Gloria jumped back in, refusing to give up on the Mitch and Cam situation.

"You are emotionally closed, Jay. Admit it. Phil spent four hours helping you with that printer, working like a little ant. Four hours! And what did you say to him when he finally got it working? Thank you. A plain, dry thank you."

Everyone looked at Phil, who shrugged with a shy smile.

Even if he didn't say it, his expression had a subtle, dulled undertone that Andrew noticed right away.

It was subtle... but definitely there.

Jay scoffed, raising his hands, "Oh please! I've given all of you twice as much as my father ever gave me. You should be grateful."

Then Jay looked at Andrew, "Right, kid? You get it. You've never complained about anything."

Andrew, still sitting with Pippa, looked at him and nodded naturally, "Yes, Grandpa. I'm used to it. One adapts," Andrew said without any drama.

Claire turned toward him, not entirely convinced, "You adapted to not getting affection from your grandfather?"

"It's not the traditional kind of affection. I got guidance, clear rules. But I know it's there. The affection, I mean. It's in the gestures. I don't need him to hug me every time I walk in to know he cares," Andrew replied with a shrug, not quite sure how to explain it.

Jay pointed at him with a mix of pride and satisfaction, "There you go! A young man with common sense."

"That might work for you men in this family... but it can cause problems in a relationship, like with Mitch and Cam," said Gloria, and Claire nodded in agreement.

'Aren't we men to you?' Mitchell thought, slightly offended, but said nothing.

Andrew frowned slightly, not quite understanding where this was going.

Gloria looked straight at him, "I'm saying this because when I told you Pippa was a gold and not to lose her, you just said 'Yeah, I know' and kept eating. That wasn't very... expressive."

"Are you saying I'm not affectionate or something with Pippa?" Andrew asked, raising an eyebrow, clearly annoyed.

"I'm just saying you didn't show much affection in that moment," Gloria replied, raising her hands in a peace gesture.

"Seriously?! I asked her to be my girlfriend in front of the whole school and kissed her right there. I have no problem showing affection in public. I even have a profile picture with her and Lily," said Andrew, half-indignant as he pulled his phone from his pocket.

And he showed everyone: a photo of him with Pippa and Lily.

Not long ago, he had even asked the whole family for advice on how to fix a small fight he'd had with Pippa. Open to suggestions and all, being more verbally expressive than he had ever been.

Andrew was about to go on, but Pippa placed her hand on his knee to let her speak.

"Gloria, believe me, Andrew is very affectionate. He hugs me when I least expect it, and he has no problem showing how he feels. He just... doesn't always do it with long, grand speeches. But it's clear," Pippa explained calmly.

Gloria nodded, her expression softening, "Alright. I'm glad to hear that. You know how I am... I worry."

Andrew exhaled, his shoulders relaxing.

"Well, you may have a point. It didn't really affect me that Grandpa's like that, because he's my grandpa, not my dad. And besides, I have my dad, who's super affectionate," said Andrew, looking at Cam.

Jay looked at him, somewhere between confused and betrayed, "Are you throwing me under the bus now?"

"Want me to tell the story about the one and only kiss your dad gave you?" Andrew asked, looking at Jay, who couldn't help but grimace.

Once, while watching an old football game and after having more whiskey than usual, Jay had opened up and told Andrew about the only kiss he ever got from his father.

"Tell it!" said Gloria.

"Well, it's not much. Basically, Grandpa's dad kissed him once because he mistook him for his sister when saying goodnight," Andrew replied.

"That's so sad! I'm really sorry, Jay," said Cam, dramatically, as usual.

"One minute, when was the last time you kissed Mitch?" Gloria asked, turning to Jay.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Jay replied, frowning.

"Everything! Mitch, when was the last time Jay kissed you?" Gloria asked, now looking at Mitch.

"Honestly... I don't remember," Mitch said with a shrug.

"It can't have been that long ago," said Jay.

"I was twelve," Mitch answered.

"Twelve?" Gloria repeated, scandalized, "That's the problem! Jay's dad never kissed Jay. Jay doesn't kiss Mitch. And now Mitch can't show affection to his lover."

"We don't call each other lovers..." Cam muttered again.

"Kiss him," said Gloria, staring at Jay.

Jay groaned in frustration, "Oh, come on..."

"You have to do it!" Gloria insisted, already pulling Mitch closer with one hand, "Now!"

Claire joined the attack, "Come on, Dad. Do it. In front of your grandchildren! Show them you're a loving grandfather."

She grabbed Jay by the arm and started pushing him forward. Meanwhile, everyone else, Andrew, Pippa, Phil, Cameron, and the rest, started clapping in rhythm and chanting in unison, "Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!"

Jay raised his hands, exasperated, "Alright, alright! Shut up!"

The room fell silent immediately.

"Come here," said Jay, looking at Mitch.

"Now? I feel uncomfortable," Mitch said, blinking. He didn't like being the center of attention, especially not for something like this.

Jay huffed, "Don't be shy. Want a box of chocolates too? Come on, let's do it!"

Mitch walked over stiffly.

Jay went for Mitch's right cheek, Mitch turned to the left, they bumped slightly, and after a quick readjustment...

Muah!

Jay gave him a dry kiss on the cheek.

There was a moment of silence, then everyone in the room began to applaud softly.

"That's the most heartwarming thing I've seen," said Cam, wiping away an invisible tear.

"Alright, and now, so none of you complain again, come here," Jay said, looking at Claire.

"Oh..." said Phil, who was hugging Claire and thought Jay was finally going to thank him properly, but his illusion was short-lived.

"Not you."

Then Jay and Claire hugged and exchanged a kiss on the cheek.

"Love you, Daddy," said Claire as she held him tight.

"Well," said Andrew, taking one last bite of his ice cream, "in the end, everything worked out and we actually got to eat dessert without shouting or fighting."

"That's already a win for your family," said Pippa with a smile.

Andrew chuckled softly, "Honestly... I didn't think a Colombian dinner would bring this much drama."

Later that night, with the dishes done and the living room empty, Cam, Mitchell, Lily, Andrew, and Pippa said their goodbyes to everyone. They would walk Pippa back to her house.

Jay just raised a hand in farewell, this time, without any shoes hanging around his neck.

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