I'm an Infinite Regressor, But I've Got Stories to Tell-Chapter 418

Tick—

The time had come.

Finally, the moment had ripened to entertain you all with a question—one single question that I’ve been endlessly hiding throughout this entire tale.

Who is the “I” in this story?

You have continued to regard “me” as the Undertaker. Naturally so, since the protagonist had always been the Undertaker.

But at the same time, you know. The one who polished the Undertaker’s story into sentences and released it to the world was none other than Oh Dok Seo.

Script: Undertaker (葬儀師)

Editing: Oh Dok Seo (吳讀書)

If the agreement made between me and Oh Dok Seo had truly been carried out, then the roles we each took would already have been revealed in the novel’s introduction.

In this tale, “I” was the Undertaker.

And at the same time, I was Oh Dok Seo.

All stories are imitations of dreams. The act of dreaming another’s dream through the form of a book.

Just as I am now dreaming Go Yuri’s dream, Oh Dok Seo was peeking into the dream of me, the regressor.

“Dok Seo.”

“…? What’s with the sudden tone?”

“There’s something I must tell you now.”

I firmly grasped Oh Dok Seo’s hands.

She flinched, startled. Living through Go Yuri’s reincarnation, I was now the daughter of a noble European house.

But I cast aside this life’s tone. I cast aside its expression. For the first time, I completely ignored the rule that I had so strictly followed—to live faithfully as Go Yuri’s reincarnation.

“H-huh?”

“You won’t understand now. But someday, you will surely read my diary—written in the form of a novel.”

“I already read tha—”

“No.”

I shook my head.

“My time living as your sibling was, from my perspective, a brief flicker—barely a spark in eternity. I will share hundreds of lives with you, and spend billions more without you.”

“……”

“I am living now to comfort one lonely person.”

I told her a story.

It was a long one. But I knew Oh Dok Seo well, and I knew how to prepare a story in the form she could consume.

Weeks passed before Oh Dok Seo devoured every word, suffered a kind of indigestion, and barely opened her lips.

“What… is it you want from me?”

“I am dissecting Go Yuri, carving away only her humanity from the vast monstrosity she has become.”

Separation. Isolation.

It was, fundamentally, the same tactic Go Yuri herself once used against the Outer Gods.

“I’m sorry, but I think I must entrust you with the same task.”

“……”

“There is no longer any need for a monster called the Undertaker to exist in this world.”

I said,

“He has grown too vast. Even before, with every step he took, hundreds of regressions coexisted within him. Now, billions of reincarnations have mixed in. Humanity has come too far to treat him as a mere human any longer.”

“So then?”

“Leave behind only the traces of the Undertaker’s life as a human in this world.”

That was my end.

“Go Yuri gave herself to me. I, too, will give myself to you.”

“……”

“Remember the Undertaker simply as a human being. A slightly strong-willed man with a sharp memory, who liked old classics like The Romance of the Three Kingdoms. Remember me as that strange old man.”

Yes.

The act of dictating each part of the story, stamping human (者) into every subtitle, was itself the process of sealing the Undertaker—a regressor—within the frame of humanity.

A desperate effort for someone who could at any moment fall into monstrosity to be remembered as a man.

“How you choose to describe me… your evaluation of me… I leave entirely to you.”

“To me…?”

“Yes.”

Go Yuri once said—

For beings like us, what matters is how much of ourselves we’re willing to cast away.

Monsters abandon nothing.

They impose themselves upon the world. They crush even the laws of the universe under their own decrees. Monsters are beings that forever cry, I, I, I.

Therefore, the way not to become a monster is simple.

It is to hand over the understanding of oneself to others, not to monopolize it alone.

The Mastermind ceased being a monster the moment it began to be called Cheon Hwa. Go Yuri transcended her own name and entrusted her entire life to me.

“It might sound strange right now… but you are actually my priestess.”

I smiled and patted Oh Dok Seo’s shoulder.

“Gods exist to lose—to their priestesses.”

“……”

And thus, the outline of the plan for how to seal myself after isolating Go Yuri took form.

Of course, there was a preliminary condition—

The Night Goddes Nut, Hecate.

The ultimate kill-stealer, always lurking to snatch the meal after everything was prepared.

“That one must be subdued and forced into surrender. Only then can I ensure she won’t meddle with your sealing process.”

Fortunately, subduing Man-sang Yu-hee was something “the future Undertaker” and “the past me” had already done.

A time repeating itself endlessly.

Everything was inevitable.

“This route we’ve reached—Go Yuri must have planned it even before my first regression began.”

A two-person, three-legged walk.

“And now… I must ensure that the prologue of the novel Oh Dok Seo will one day read starts not with Go Yuri—but with the Undertaker’s story.”

It was easy.

“As long as Man-sang Yu-hee perceives the Undertaker as a more dangerous variable than Go Yuri, that’s enough.”

In other words,

“Once all the schedules are adjusted and the main route begins—Go Yuri will refrain from directly interfering with the world’s destruction.”

A kind of camouflage.

See? I’m not really dangerous—.

Well, I am dangerous, but as long as you don’t touch me, I won’t act rashly—.

But if you do touch me, I’ll scold you! Got it?

Naturally, Man-sang Yu-hee’s attention would turn from the reincarnator to the regressor.

It was smarter to eliminate the immediate thorn—the regressor—than to deal with a reincarnator with no intention of moving.

“Heh.”

A laugh escaped me.

“That’s exactly the position Go Yuri always had, isn’t it.”

The reason Go Yuri reacted so sharply to the Leviathan’s landing, too, became clear when I considered her grand strategy.

“I, the Undertaker, must someday abandon my aura and find my own method of survival.”

“But the 664th regression is too soon. At that point, the Undertaker still lacks the experience to make that decision.”

“Until enough experience is gained, depending on aura is inevitable.”

This was Go Yuri’s ‘Regressor Maker.’

Regressor cultivation needed to proceed step by step.

Realizing the truth of the Leviathan too early would be troublesome; realizing it too late would also be disastrous.

“For the sake of one person—”

I met my next lives.

“To come this far with sincerity.”

I lived all lives, and I watched all lives.

I kept silent as a throat moaning from the deepest pits, and I spoke with command from the highest spires.

I lived as a beggar, leaning against a roadside ditch, surviving on a single bowl. For one without legs, the ditch’s depth was a valley.

I stretched out my hand toward tourists on dust-choked streets.

All lives were pitiful before destruction.

“The reincarnator was not merely someone who wept.”

In every life, I held the hands that rose like prayers.

“Humanity is strong.”

I saw flowers blooming from the ditch. Their petals remained red even beneath dust.

“Look. Even when Outer Gods mock the world and wreak havoc, among humans, one reincarnator and one regressor have walked this far.”

Let’s go.

“Dok Seo. You’ll think it’s sad.”

Let’s keep walking.

“It saddens me too—to think I’m passing all these stories and regrets onto you.”

The Cheon Hwa twins were born.

I was their mother’s childhood friend. Their mother died young, asking me before she passed to take care of her daughters.

Those girls would later fall prey to Outer Gods and slaughter countless people.

Yet, the children smiling before me now would one day love a man—and eventually accept the world that man existed in.

“But you, my dear, are strong.”

Dang Seo Rin was born.

The human who once possessed her body had died. Yet the alien god inheriting her memories accepted her humanity—without even realizing she was a god.

She would one day sing lullabies to soothe other monsters, walking beside a man.

“Do not crumble in sorrow.”

Yu Ji-won did not die.

Originally, on a summer day of torrential rain, Yu Ji-won murdered her parents and her senile grandmother before ending her own life.

She had courage. The courage to treat all beings as insects—and the courage to treat herself as one too.

I had once been born as Yu Ji-won’s younger sibling, and back then, she secretly strangled the infant me while her parents looked away.

Because there was no need to add one more to this hell.

“It’s okay to forget everything. That can be an ending too. But if you cannot forget—if you cannot forgive—then become strong.”

To prevent Yu Ji-won’s suicide, someone else’s breath was needed beneath the rainy night sky.

“Become rich enough in spirit to remain yourself, even after giving yourself away.”

I saw the path.

Along this route lay Dang Seo Rin, the lives that perished so she could exist, Jung Ye-ji, the souls sacrificed so Ye-ji could form, Noh Doha, Cheon Hwa, Yu Ji-won, Lee Ha-yul, Shim Ah-ryun, Yu Ji-won again—and countless others.

“……”

Go Yuri turned back as she walked.

She smiled brightly.

And so did I.

“What I wish to leave you with isn’t sorrow—but the strength to keep walking, even after reading all these wounds.”

Go Yuri believed in me.

I believed in Oh Dok Seo.

And then—

“Bbb—Bbb-bbb-bbb—Blehh—”

Now, it was time for me to believe in myself.

“Huh? Huh? You smiled! You smiled!”

Tick.

Looking up at “me,” who gazed down at “me,” newly born as my own younger brother—

I parted my soft lips.

Hình dạng

8

Yes, Undertaker.

Welcome. We meet again.

Though “nice to meet you” will always remain a possible greeting for you now.

I will soon be erased from this world.

It’s what you once wished for most dearly, so please, be happy.

Ah—no, I’m joking! Just joking.

I lived a strange life.

I lived.

Before you entered my dream—well, no, before I tripped you into it. It was my way of hiding embarrassment, so please forgive me.

Anyway—

Before you entered, you asked me.

Why didn’t I save Schopenhauer?

I’m sorry.

It was intentional.

Of course, everything that happened was the result of my choice.

You were the perfect candidate, Undertaker.

I was certain I had finally found my priestess, made solely for me.

…But humans cannot always be strong.

Even your beloved Kafka said—Alexander could march forward only because there stood before him a wall of India, something for his sword to point toward.

When unseen, one does not aim.

One gives up.

Humans have that sad nature—if the goal isn’t vivid before their eyes, they often won’t even try.

So I created a signpost for you, named “Schopenhauer.”

From now on—from billions of years ago—you, Undertaker, from this moment of meeting me, were destined to walk the long path of the regressor.

It will be hard.

It will be sad.

But if the goal stands before you—then you have the strength not to give up.

Yes.

The corpse of Schopenhauer, who just took his own life because you couldn’t save him—

that is the signpost I gifted you.

A mark you can never ignore—

a reminder of why you began this path, and what must await at its end.

Emmet Schopenhauer.

Please, someday, save my father.

You’ll probably call it cruel, unfair. I’ll accept that.

In return, I will be destroyed by your hand.

Dyed in the red bloom of the Udumbara.

If needed, through the seal of time I made for you.

I will vanish. Leaving behind billions of family members here, and disappearing with the deleted souls from billions of routes.

Only you, in this world, will remember me.

And to walk this path, to pierce through the emptiness left in your heart—only one condition is required.

Love me—

desperately.

And then, forget me.

Love others besides me.

Forget that you ever loved me. Forget that I ever loved you.

Forget the wounds I gave you, and those you gave me. Forget that you forgot.

And live on.

…There will be side effects, of course.

The world spared from destruction will find it a little harder… to remember what is precious.

Memories will grow unstable.

It will become harder to truly see someone.

Of course—because the “I” that once was has left holes in people’s hearts.

But if that is the only price to pay—

If this is all it takes to avert such an absurd apocalypse—

then I will gladly bear it.

I have been terribly rude.

Please understand—this was the best I could do,

for a child who one day died, then awoke only to find herself living another life.

I love you.

Mother. Father. Everyone.

Did I do well?

Did I choose the right person?

I loved you.

I gave up much. I lived a life that forced me to give up much. Yet, to the very end, there was one thing I refused to abandon.

That even in a world like this,

I am glad to have been born.

And from the depths of my heart—

I am truly grateful.

Farewell.

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Tick—

June 24th, 12:00.

The regressor encounters “Hecate” Dang Seo Rin at the Busan crossroads.

Mass refugee flow toward Busan nationwide.

Worldwide daily death toll: 51,956,792.

June 22nd, 14:20.

The regressor reunites with Yu Ji-won at a Seoul rest stop.

Korean army’s main force annihilated by the Decapods.

Worldwide daily death toll: 124,956,792.

June 21st, 13:00.

The regressor meets prosthetics technician Noh Doha at the National Rehabilitation Hospital while evacuating patients from attackers.

Worldwide daily death toll: 319,956,792.

June 18th, 20:00.

The regressor enters Baekhwa Girls’ High School tutorial dungeon. Encounters Cheon Hwa amid the distorted timeline of the Infinite Void.

Worldwide daily death toll: 771,221,328.

June 17th, 16:00.

The regressor makes contact with the one known as “Saintess.” The Regressor Alliance is formed.

June 17th, 14:10.

Emmet Schopenhauer dies in a Busan café.

June 17th, 14:00.

A massive White Night of the Void occurs south of the Han River, Seoul.

June 17th, 14:00.

Simultaneous global appearance of small-scale Voids—so-called “Tutorial Dungeons.”

Worldwide daily death toll: 1,649,857,026.

June 17th, 13:59.

Regressor, regression.

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April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

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Tick—

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April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 07th, 17:11. Oh Dok Seo, death.

April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 07th, 19:20. Oh Dok Seo, death.

April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 08th, 04:44. Oh Dok Seo, death.

April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 08th, 04:44. Oh Dok Seo, death.

April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 08th, 04:44. Oh Dok Seo, death.

April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 08th, 13:10. Oh Dok Seo, death.

April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

May 09th, 08:36. Oh Dok Seo, death.

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April 29th, 16:00.

Oh Dok Seo, awakening.

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June 17th, 13:59.

Regressor, regression.

-Regressor. End.