I was Kidnapped for Revenge by a Ruthless Alpha-Chapter 203: Being Back Hurt

~Ambrose~

I was feeling desperate.

Desperate to hide, to avoid, to run in the completely opposite direction. Alarms rang in my head, screaming to turn around, to not go. 𝙛𝓻𝒆𝒆𝒘𝙚𝓫𝙣𝙤𝒗𝙚𝓵.𝙘𝙤𝙢

Onyx was pacing back and forth in my mind, equally uneased by the idea of going back. Back to the place we lost everything.

I’d been trying to keep an eye on Raven, but her mind was completely absent. She removed herself mentally and was nothing but an empty shell. Hollow and shallow. I watched her, using Raven as a gauge to manage my own pain. Emalea noticed Raven’s demeanor and took her hand, rubbing her thumb over the back of Raven’s hand, grounding her. Tethering her to the moment.

Odette was constantly doing the same it was the only thing holding me together.

When we pulled into the old gate that circled the pack. What once stood tall and proud, was now crumbling. Grime and algae growing on the side of the wall, streaks of orange for the iron in the rain were all over the surface.

There was no resemblance to the glory this pack once held.

I found myself holding my breath as I thought about that night.

When we drove through the gate, the scene changed.

It got worse. Much worse.

I thought I’d prepared myself.

Onyx thought he’d prepared himself.

We’d lied to one another.

The death and pain from that night had left a stain on this place, scars on the land that would never heal. Homes more broken and crumbled than before, some had only the foundation left. The earth still had the scorch marks from dragon fire that eloped the pack grounds.

I was losing my grip. I could feel my confidence wavering and my sense of self fading. Odette was feeding on my pain trying to replace it with feelings of calm and content, but it seemed like my emotional cup would refill the moment it was empty again.

It was heartbreaking for her. I could see the pity in her eyes every single time her eyes rested on me. It pissed me off. I didn’t need anyone’s pity.

But it wasn’t like I was in a position fight or yell. I couldn’t get mad at her, I was a pitiful sight right now.

The minute the pack house rolled into view. We could all see the damage from that night. The shattered windowpanes brought all the memories rushing back. My head filled with flashbacks of that night.

My mothers hand hitting the floor. The shrieks of my friends in the pack. Images of half shifted bodies bloodied and shredded, laying discarded on the ground. The scent of blood and despair assaulted my nose.

Onyx howled in my mind, the pain of losing our mother still as fresh as it was the morning after it happened. The dreadful agonizing empty ache in our chest.

The pain reminded me of why I wanted revenge. Why I planned for years to punish Odette for the sins of her family. Never knowing the whole truth.

Not knowing that my own uncle doomed his pack, how my father cheated on his fated mate directly contributing to the death of his mate, my mother.

I didn’t realize while it was happening, but I was hyperventilating, spiraling, my hands were trembling, and Odette just sat beside me in the car, my rock, my support to lean on as the world around me fell into destruction and ruin all over again.

The screams in my mind echoed, the smell of blood seemed fresh, too fresh it made me gag. The fear it swelled inside me, controlling my mind. I was spinning. My mind waring inside.

It was like I was back in that night. The red eyes filling in the darkness outside.

Odette just whispered "Shhh... Shhh... That time has passed and you are strong enough now." She just repeated that over and over. Grounding me to the present despite the nonstop efforts of the past to drag me back.

Push and pull, it felt like my brain was being ripped at the seams. I wanted to scream. But no sound came from my mouth.

After about an hour into the meltdown we were the only ones in left in the car. Everyone else had left. I was grateful no one was around to see me fall apart. When I found the ground beneath my feet once more. I sucked in a deep breath and then coughed, my chest burned and my throat felt like dry sandpaper with every swallow.

"Welcome back to the present, where you are with me." Odette ran her hand down the back of my head and pulled me down to her level, pressing the side of my face to her chest. I could hear the soothing rhythm of her heartbeat, anchoring me to her, to this moment. It allowed me time to gain some clarity and recover.

Onyx leaned into mind, into the feeling of her touch. Purring. He was in need of her comfort just as much as me.

Now that he was able to connect to her consciousness separately, he was able to find relief of his own.

I pulled back and lifted her chin so her gaze could meet mine. I stared at her holding her attention and focus and smiled, "I don’t deserve you, and I’m so glad my past life earned me this chance."

I meant every single word.

I got you the chance, are you serious? Onyx complained rolling his eyes in my mind.

"Onyx doesn’t agree with your telling of the story, does he?" Odette laughed lightly.

"No, but then again he rarely agrees with anything since he met you, he’s a guardian wolf and for you he rolls on his belly and wiggles his tail like puppy..." I mocked him in my mind. "It’s a shame to call him an alpha wolf."

Screw you. You cheat. You hackjob. You’d be nothing without me. He huffed.

And just like that a sense of normalcy found me again.

Maybe... Just maybe... I’ll survive the horrors this place brought once more.