Help! I Became A Guy In A BL Novel!-Chapter 87: Stupid Wolf

Riven felt his resolve crumbling, and he took an uncertain step forward. Just that small movement had Ronan closing the distance, cupping Riven’s flushed cheeks and leaning down until their foreheads touched.

"I’m sorry," Ronan whispered, his voice trembling with sincerity. "I should have never left you."

Riven’s breath hitched, his hands tentatively reaching up to clutch the front of Ronan’s shirt. A small, pitiful sound escaped his lips, and Ronan pulled him closer, wrapping his arms securely around him.

The embrace made Riven’s heart ache, and his body relaxed, finally letting go of his restraint. He hated that he craved this touch so much, but his instincts were relentless. Riven’s ears flattened against his head, and he buried his face in Ronan’s shoulder, trying to calm his uneven breathing.

Riven’s world was spinning. The warmth from Ronan’s touch seeped into his skin, and despite his instincts screaming at him to relax and submit, his mind remained turbulent and restless.

The surge of comfort from being in Ronan’s arms settled some of the ache in his body. That unbearable tension that made his muscles tighten and his mind cloud over was slowly ebbing away.

As the crushing anxiety of separation faded, Riven forced himself to think clearly, to process why his body had reacted so violently this time. He had been through heat many times before, but none had ever made him physically reject anyone else’s touch—not even Soren’s. It didn’t make sense.

But the more he considered it, the more the answer seemed glaringly obvious. Now, he was not a smart cookie, but this felt like the most logical conclusion.

This wasn’t just a normal heat. It was something else entirely—triggered because Ronan had entered his rut. A special kind of heat, one meant for bonded mates. It was a reaction of his body to Ronan’s presence, heightened because their bond was resonating.

Riven swallowed hard, hating the way his body betrayed him. This was natural—an instinctive bond meant for mates. But that didn’t change how he felt. He hated that he couldn’t control himself, that he still craved Ronan so much despite the pain his mate had caused him. He hated how desperately he wanted to give in.

Still, he needed to make one thing clear. Even as his body relaxed, his heart remained wounded. He forced himself to look up, his lips trembling as he spoke.

"I still... Hate you," he whispered, the words shaky but resolute.

Ronan froze, his eyes widening in shock. Those simple words struck him like a dagger to the chest, piercing through his soul and leaving him breathless. His hands trembled as they cupped Riven’s flushed face, forcing Riven to look at him.

Ronan’s thumb brushed over Riven’s cheek, and his eyes softened, pain swirling in their depths.

He leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss against Riven’s lips. It wasn’t rough or demanding—it was tender and almost desperate, as if he were afraid that Riven would vanish if he let go. Between kisses, he whispered brokenly, "Don’t hate me... I can’t stand it... Please..."

The kisses were slow, almost reverent, and Ronan’s hands cradled Riven’s face with a tenderness that made Riven’s chest ache. He did not want to hate his mate, he did not ask to Ronan to act that way. But what’s done is done, and now he had to deal with it.

Going against ’nature’ and hating his mate just caused him more emotional distress. It was a painful situation to be in.

He wanted to shove Ronan away, to scream at him and demand answers, but his body refused to obey. Instead, he melted into the kiss, his hands clutching Ronan’s sleeves in a weak attempt to ground himself.

Even as Ronan kissed him softly, Riven’s thoughts wouldn’t stop spiraling. He needed to clear this up before things went any further. He couldn’t let his heat and Ronan’s rut dictate their actions without knowing the truth. As much as his instincts screamed at him to submit and let his mate take care of him, his rationality wouldn’t let him fall that easily.

With a shaky breath, he pulled back, breaking the kiss despite the ache that flared from the loss of contact. He stared up at Ronan, trying to ignore how his mate’s gaze was so intense, so full of longing.

"If not for the rut," Riven whispered, his voice fragile but determined, "you wouldn’t have approached me. Will you leave after this? Once your rut ends... will you abandon me again?" frёewebηovel.cѳm

Ronan’s eyes widened, and his heart sank, guilt flooding his chest. He couldn’t bear hearing those words—couldn’t bear the idea that Riven thought he would leave him behind again. His hands moved to Riven’s shoulders, holding him close, almost as if afraid that his mate would vanish if he loosened his grip.

"No... No, Riven, never," he choked out, his voice cracking. "I’ve been looking for you since the moment you left. I thought I’d go mad without you. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t eat. Nothing made sense without you there. I... I’m just a stupid wolf."

Riven stayed still for a second. He called himself a wolf, not an alpha. As if this was his barest self.

He reached up, hesitating for a moment before resting his hand on Ronan’s chest, feeling the frantic heartbeat underneath his palm. "You left me," he whispered. He continued, "And you say you were stupid?"

"Very stupid. I have no excuse." He repeated softly. He had no excuse, what was his excuse? He did everything with a sound mind. He simply regretted it. That was no excuse.

Ronan cupped his cheek, guiding Riven to meet his eyes. "Please," he whispered. "I love you. I’m here now, and I’m not leaving. Not ever again."

Riven’s anger did not waver. He wasn’t ready to forgive, but he couldn’t deny how desperately he needed Ronan right now. His instincts screamed at him to close the gap, to let his mate in, to let go of the hurt just for a moment.