Captured By The Cold Detective (BL)-Chapter 558: Limit of Selfishness

As soon as He Juan looked into those familiar eyes, his head spun for a split second as a flood of images surged to the forefront of his mind. The hazy memories gradually cleared like an invisible hand had wiped the dust away, allowing him to visit the day of their bitter parting seven years ago.

"XIU, I’m leaving. I still have no idea where to go, but... I can’t stay here any longer. None of us can."

"But what... what about Marius?"

"He will not return, XIU. Until when are you going to deceive yourself? Think about it. How slim are the chances of him surviving in that kind of—"

"Shut up."

"—accident? It’s been almost two months, XIU. It’s time for you to—"

"SHUT UP!"

"Hiss—!" A sharp pain seared through his head and he clutched it with a wince, sending a wave of alarm and panic rippling through the others.

"Boss!"

"What’s wrong? Is your head hurting again?!"

"Are you okay, Boss? Should we call the doctor?!"

He Juan hurriedly told them, "I’m fine, there’s no need to trouble the doctor. It’s just the usual discomfort." Perhaps it was because of the lingering effects of the Golden Sand, everytime the memories of the past resurfaced, his headache would intensify. However, it was nothing he couldn’t endure. He put on a reassuring smile on his face and glanced at Ye Qiu, who looked visibly alarmed. "I would like to have a talk with... Miss Ye. Can you leave us alone for a while?"

The men scrutinized him for a moment before turning away with a disgruntled look on their faces. "Press the button beside your bed if you need the doctor," Huang Zhiyan cautioned, to which He Juan responded with a helpless nod.

"Are you okay?" Ye Qiu asked with a concerned furrow between her brow. "I chose to visit today because I heard your condition has improved, but I can always come back another time."

"I’m fine, really," He Juan affirmed helplessly. He had no idea how many times he had said this sentence over the past few days as everyone would be thrown into panic whenever he showed the slightest bit of discomfort on his face. "On the other hand, you..." he paused for a beat, unable to think of the right words to say. In the end, he could only settle with a lame question, "How have you been?"

Stupid question, he knew. He did not need to ask to know that Ye Qiu must have struggled a lot to reach where she was today. He Juan took in her appearance for the second time, feeling a brief sense of disorientation whenever he was struck with the reminder of how much the world had changed around him.

Ye Qiu was now twenty five, just one year younger than him when the accident occurred.

Time had eroded the sharp defensive thorns around the teenager, molding her into a poised, grounded and charismatic woman. Her well-fitted suit only served to accentuate her mature and confident aura. There was a quiet yet unwavering intensity in her eyes that spoke of thousands untold words, enabling her to suppress others with just a glance.

The anxious and helpless teenager in He Juan’s memory was no more. Standing before him was a full-fledged adult Alpha, a leader, and a drug lord who was both revered and feared.

And He Juan... He Juan truly had no idea how to feel. Of course, he was happy that Ye Qiu finally managed to carve a place for herself in this vast world. But at the same time, when he thought of how her position used to belong to Marius...

It was then that He Juan came to an important realization. Whether she had given up or not, it was not his place to pass judgment. Each person had their own unique way to mourn and cope with their losses. And perhaps for Ye Qiu, this was her way of grieving for the man she loved.

The curvature of Ye Qiu’s lips deepened as she replied, "I’m doing well, as you can see. On the contrary, it’s you who is not in the best shape."

He Juan cleared his throat, feeling a bit awkward about the way things had turned out. Once, he had been the one who offered her a helping hand and shelter, but now it was her turn to do the same for him.

Oh how the wheel of fate had turned...

She approached him and sat down on the chair by his bedside, and He Juan’s eyes were inexorably drawn to the familiar bracelet around her wrist. "That..." he snapped his gaze to her in shock before he could stop himself.

Ye Qiu followed his line of sight and a melancholic look flashed through her eyes. "Ah, this?" She caressed the Buddhist bracelet that had once belonged to Marius with such gentleness that it sent a pang of hurt through He Juan’s heart. He became more certain that it was the very same bracelet that had been found in the sea during the search for the missing man. "Sirius gave it to me. He said that... this was his brother’s protective charm, and now that I have assumed his position, it’s only right for me to keep it on me."

"Sirius..." He Juan murmured the name under his breath. Yet another person he had failed. Swallowing the lump on his throat, he couldn’t help asking, "How is he now?"

"Of course, he’s fine. What could have happened to him?" Ye Qiu snorted in disdain. "That brat is so unlike his brother. Prickly, sensitive, arrogant, he’s just like a little hedgehog." Despite her words, He Juan could detect the underlying amusement and fondness in her tone, and it drew a smile on his face as well.

Good, He Juan thought. Everyone seemed to be doing well even without him. It made him feel relieved and also a little... lonely. Yet as soon as that notion crossed his mind, He Juan immediately stomped it down before it could take root in his heart.

Lonely? Why should he? Wasn’t it great that everyone had moved on from the past and strived to become a better version of themselves? He was already thirty three, for God’s sake. It was utterly ridiculous for him to act this childish! He Juan shook his head and told himself not to dwell on these useless matters.

He only needed to feel happy for them. That’s right, it was the limit of how selfish he could be.

A question had been hanging on the tip of He Juan’s tongue, one that he could not bring himself to ask the men. Unable to contain it any longer, the query slipped from his lips, laced with a glimmer of hope and anticipation that maybe he himself was not aware of. "...Has there been any updates about Marius in the past seven years?"

Ye Qiu shook her head, and He Juan fought not to show the disappointment on his face. "We still haven’t received any news, but..." she caressed the bracelet again, gently and affectionately, almost like a subconscious movement. Raising her head, she quirked her lips into a tiny smile, "...I want to believe that he is happy, no matter where he is now." 𝓯𝙧𝙚𝒆𝙬𝙚𝒃𝙣𝙤𝒗𝓮𝓵.𝙘𝙤𝙢

He Juan’s nose turned sour as he nodded. "Mn," he returned with a small smile of his own. "I agree."