Becoming a Monster-Chapter 59: Accepting who I am

As mid-day arrived, the sun cast a warm glow through the windows, bathing the room in light. Although Noah’s vision wasn’t hindered by the darkness due to his spider-like characteristics, his new eyes were better suited for detecting movement. The additional sunlight that warmed his skin was a welcome change from the stifling darkness.

"Plea-Please don-don’t kill meee..." The man’s voice trembled, his words barely audible amidst his quivering. Despite his earlier attempts to flee, his struggles had subsided, replaced by the dull ache in his legs and the tightness in his chest. Each movement sent waves of agony through his body, regret gnawed at him for daring to aim his bow towards the bloody maniac. When his finger first "slipped", it was truly an accident. His heart stopped when it happened; he thought he was going to accidentally kill someone.

However, Noah’s creature easily intervened, and Noah continued on as if the threat on his life didn’t matter. In the depths of Ron’s soul, a seed of inferiority took shape in the man’s heart. He couldn’t be completely sure, but when the arrow "slipped" the second time, he couldn’t recall the same sense of anxiousness or regret he held the first time. Honestly, his thoughts were unsettling, anticipating for the arrow to land."

How would he know that an arrow of his that was so easy to block would cause Noah to want to take his life? With time to reflect, he realized the foolishness of his actions and the gravity of his mistake. As he dwelled in his predicament, thoughts of Olivia surfaced, he somewhat recalled Olivia calling out his name, her voice echoing in his mind. Was she safe? Why hadn’t anyone come to his rescue? The unlocked doors offered a glimmer of hope, but no one has yet to appear.

Meanwhile, Noah looked over to the man wrapped in webs, his sword dragging along the ground as he approached. He’s been trying to ignore it, but as time passed, the sword was feeling heavier and heavier with his reduced strength. Noah acknowledged the burden of his weakened state. Only his resilient constitution kept him going, though even his bag felt like a cumbersome weight. However he was determined to deliver the final blow himself.

Removing his bookbag, Noah began to lazily drag his sword again as he arrived above the man’s head. He wasn’t the kind of person who enjoyed torture. The sight of a grown man reduced to tears brought him no satisfaction. The man who now resembled a scared little boy wanted to cry out in forgiveness, yet his words didn’t faze Noah at all before he hovered his sword over the person’s face, eventually letting gravity do the rest.

To Noah’s astonishment, the sword went through the man’s cheek and eye before sinking through the floor. The descent was so smooth, for a moment Noah believed he saw the man’s eyes move to look at him one last time before they lost their luster. There was no outcry, leading Noah to believe the person probably passed without realizing his life was taken.

It was truly unexpected since Noah had yet to use the sword to battle, the sharpness was more than he anticipated. With that thought, he turned around, noticing the clean line trailing behind him where the sword was cutting through the floor.

’Okay....sword is super fucking sharp, keep away from feet noted. But now we can finally find out...’

"Arachne, a little help please? Just like the little spiders before." He pointed to the lifeless body, more specifically, to his chest. While Noah could’ve done it himself, it would be easy for Arachne to get the job done with her current stats.

His decision was proven to be correct, Arachne crawled over, curiously eyeing the corpse’s frame, unaware where the core would be held. The situation was different compared to the spiders where she instinctively was able to point out their cores with perfect efficiency. This realization led Noah to speculate that cores resonated with their respective species, particularly in animals attuned to their instincts.

Noah noticed her behavior before redirecting Arachne towards the chest once more. Without hesitation, she plunged her leg into the chest cavity, eliciting a twitch from the body as her blow forcefully pierced through the rib cage and reached the heart. With Arachne’s task complete, Noah knelt down amidst the blood, determined to retrieve the coveted prize.

Seconds passed and Noah was yet to find what he was looking for. He was beginning to feel disheartened that he wouldn’t find it since he was almost certain that it would be there. In his last attempt to look, Noah extracted the heart from the corpse, using his free hand to sift through the blood in search of anything resembling a circular, hard object.

Sniff sniff*

As Noah continued his search, he was suddenly overwhelmed by an enticing aroma wafting through the air. The scent of fresh blood and flesh intoxicated his senses, causing his mind to wander. His rationality began to wane, his thoughts clouded by an insatiable craving. It was then that he noticed the heart still clutched in his hand.

’It’s just one bite...’ he reasoned, his craving affecting his judgment. He wasn’t fully coherent with what he was doing. Bringing the heart close to his face, he took one last deep sniff before taking a bite.

"Mhm!" Despite the heart being raw, the taste was surprisingly satisfying. In his excitement, Noah applied too much force, causing a burst of blood to splatter across his face. Although he tried to remain composed, the sensation of something hard striking his cheek jolted him back to reality.

The blow helped him regain his thoughts, losing control of his body served as a heavy reminder of the danger the skill budding feeder would bring him if left unchecked. Surprisingly, his body instinctively kept a strong hold on the heart as he glanced around for the object that flung out.

’It’s fine, it’s fine....If it tastes good then it’s not wrong to eat, right? More importantly, was that what I think it was?’

Noah’s gaze shifted towards the ground, his extra pupils allowing him to spot the object immediately. With his free hand, he lifted the pearl to inspect it. Unlike the whitish-gray pearls from the spiders, the one he held now was a dark blue hue. Though he couldn’t explain the difference, it didn’t matter as long as it served the same purpose.

Without a second thought, Noah stuffed the pearl into his mouth, feeling it disperse just like last time. Instantly, he sensed a familiar sensation and received another notification.

[You consumed the mana source of an incompatible species, only magic is affected by the core’s effects. Due to the title, ’The Fallen’ you have acquired an affinity to mana and extracted the full amount of mana to increase your magic source.]

[You have reached the limit of the effectiveness the current zero tier mana stones have on your mana. Mana obtained from current mana stones are reduced by 90 percent of their original effectiveness.]

Initially disheartened by the term ’incompatible,’ Noah prepared himself for disappointment, fearing he wouldn’t gain anything from consuming the pearl. However, as he continued reading, he realized that the outcome exceeded his expectations.

Noah was already certain that the increase to his mana would be insignificant, and as he glanced at his mana pool, his suspicions were confirmed—it hadn’t increased at all. Arachne had been able to gain a lot more mana than he did, but that was only because she had yet to reach her first limit, unlike him. The most significant realization from all of this was that his title entitled him to the core’s mana, regardless of his compatibility with it, a privilege his creatures weren’t able to access.

The penalty was indeed disheartening, but in Noah’s eyes, the greatest benefit of consuming the mana cores wasn’t the increase in mana alone. It was the accelerated progression of his skills, which felt like an outright cheat code. Tasks that would have taken him weeks to master, he now accomplished in a fraction of the time, all within a single day. Armed with this knowledge, Noah grew more convinced that sacrificing his humanity was the most effective path to gaining strength.

Now that he was in a good mood, Noah absentmindedly started to take small bites out of the heart still in his hand as he made his way to the shopkeeper.

"Mm Arachne, make sure you guard the entrance, and yes you can eat him. I have no further need for him."

Meanwhile, as Noah was aiming to get full use of his gold, the people outside the shop still haven’t recovered from the recent events.

"Neal, are we going to sit here and do nothing?" Regina, inches away from Neal’s face, angrily demanded answers. All eyes turned to him, awaiting his response, but Neal found himself at a loss. He continuously processed everything that just happened, thinking about where he went wrong.

His gaze drifted down the steps, settling on Fenrir, who lay on its belly, watching the room with an unsettling intensity. Beside the creature, a pool of blood marked the spot where Olivia had died, not even the rest of her body was spared as it was now in the beast’s belly.

’If it wasn’t for that, then I wouldn’t be nervous about attacking him. How did he do it? Maybe it’s not worth it, he said he was going to leave. I can just hope that he goes off somewhere and dies, but I can’t, now that he openly killed people in front of everyone, I could lose everything if I don’t deal with this appropriately.’ His mind raced quickly, he just needed to find a way to remove himself as the reason for blame like he always did.

"If any of you believe that we can take down that beast before he returns then I’ll stand by you!" Neal declared boldly, pausing to scan the room. He made deliberate eye contact with those who seemed eager for action, silently conveying his question—’do you think you can do it?’ Through this silent exchange, he gauged their resolve, noticing how some quickly looked away when met with his gaze.

Satisfied with his initial assessment, Neal pressed on, "Otherwise we will have to concede for now. However! Don’t think I will let even one of us be killed without retaliation. If you can wait a bit longer, then we will repay this debt tenfold!

The crowd regained their spark of resolve at Neal’s words. Having made them realize their own faults, he then gave them a way out to make them believe that they could make up for their inadequacy, instilling them with a renewed sense of purpose.

A small smirk appeared on Neal’s face before it faded into a frown. There was still a small situation he just couldn’t deal with and that was that they were still stuck up here!

Neal wondered if they could descend halfway down the steps without attracting the wolf’s attention and jump down. Before he could voice his idea, multiple footsteps echoed from the hall where Noah had entered earlier.

Nervous murmurs rippled through the crowd as they speculated whether the newcomers were allies of Noah, further intensifying their sense of unease. The tension reached its peak when they realized the sheer size of the group. However, the apprehension subsided slightly as they observed the visible signs of fatigue and fear among the newcomers.

Mark and their group attempted to backtrack the way Noah came, believing that following in Noah’s footsteps would be a safe path. But their plans were thwarted by a sudden spider ambush. Caught off guard and lacking the stamina or mana to mount a proper defense, they were forced to flee. Regrettably, they were forced to leave behind those ensnared in the crossfire of webs.

The webs proved formidable, absorbing the blows from their weapons and leaving them with few options for defense. Unable to free their comrades without specialized skills, immense strength, or superior weapons, they were left feeling helpless.

Fortunately, the spiders seemed content with capturing a few victims to satisfy their hunger and save some for later. Six bodies were taken, and to the group’s relief, the spiders didn’t pursue them as they passed by.

All the group wanted to do now was to be able to rest. Instead they grew anxious when they found the piles of bodies of zombies and insects outside the building. It wasn’t as much as the numbers they encountered in the gym, still it was a rise for concern. There was nowhere else in the campus that could feed such a large number of students and more importantly, they needed to find a way to get in touch with people of authority.

Upon reaching the lobby, they noticed unfamiliar faces among the survivors, and some of the old ones were conspicuously missing.

"Jas?" From the sudden call of Jasmine’s name, everyone looked up to the voice and noticed it was Neal who called out to her. Jasmine may not have been as pretty as Regina, but because of her intellect, her bearings, and her motherly appeal. Many people had set their sights on her.

"It’s ’Jasmine’ to you, jerk! Where’s Noah? I know he’s here! that son of a bitch led us into an ambush." Mark interjected on Jasmine’s behalf.

It wasn’t that Mark was aware of Neal’s true character that he disliked him. It was Neal’s habit of flirting with his sister while pursuing other women that grated on his nerves.

The latter part of Mark’s statement was more of a muttered grievance, but everyone heard him ask for Noah. Though Noah may not have been well-known during their school days, his name now evoked a sense of dread among those in the building.

Even though Neal was surprised that they were looking for Noah, he could sense the underlying animosity in Mark’s words. He felt that maybe paying Noah back wouldn’t take as long as he thought.

"If you’re looking for Noah, he’s here. Without even trying to listen, he killed two people in cold blood. The blood of one of them is still by that beast!" Neal’s voice shook with emotion, his body trembling with fear as he pointed towards Fenrir. His words rang out loud, on the verge of breaking into tears. "Will you help us get rid of him? I’m afraid of what he will do when he returns."

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