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Become a Star-Chapter 149
“So, are you saying that everything in the article is true? Are you saying that we did have that conversation?”
When Woo-Jin asked Kim Seok-Hyung in disbelief, a cocky smile appeared on the latter’s face.
— Of course! The contents of our conversation and the reason behind your departure from TM were written in the article. Are you trying to deny everything now? I was so surprised when I read the article because the journalist knew exactly what happened.
“In that case, are you saying that the whistle-blower took the phone from your desk and reported everything as is without making any modifications?
— Does it need to be rectified at all?
Kim Seok-Hyung’s answer had already been determined — everything that had been written in the article was an undeniable fact. The moment he answered ‘no,’ he would be proving Chae Woo-Jin’s innocence.
“You’re truly too much. You know the truth.”
Chae Woo-Jin pleaded and sounded as though he was close to tears; the more desperate his voice sounded, the more excited Kim Seok-Hyung got. Even though Chae Woo-Jin was holding a press conference, Kim Seok-Hyung concluded that ultimately, he had no evidence or information to present.
— No matter what you say, the truth remains unchanged.
“In that case, are you saying you will not be raising any objections regarding this article? And that the contents of the article are true and match the information and materials you have?”
— That’s right!
“That means you’re saying you were the one who fabricated them.”
— …
Only after Woo-Jin pointed that out, did Kim Seok-Hyung realize he had made a mistake, but it was too late to change his words. So instead, he chose to respond with silence.
“You and I are the only people who know the truth. But if the information and materials were fabricated by you, isn’t the intention behind the act too obvious?”
When Woo-Jin made a solid argument, Kim Seok-Hyung briefly agonized over how to respond. He felt that it would give him the upper hand to end the call here, so he moved his finger to the ‘end call’ button. However, he stopped moving when he heard a faintly audible cry coming from the other end of the line.
“You’re really too much.”
Chae Woo-Jin was crying; even when he was bullied by the Blue Fit members or threatened by TM because of the sponsorship issue back then, Chae Woo-Jin had remained strong. That same Chae Woo-Jin was crying right now. It was clear to Kim Seok-Hyung that he had truly cornered Chae Woo-Jin this time around. As expected, Kim Seok-Hyung thought he had made the right choice, so his body quivered with joy.
— I didn’t do anything wrong. Who would've known it would blow up because of an article? It can’t be helped if I were to be blamed for not keeping the evidence safe, but I’m also a victim of theft.
Convinced he had the upper hand, Kim Seok-Hyung relaxed his tensed back muscles and leaned back comfortably against his chair as he answered. He kept swiveling his chair as he loosened up. The more he slouched, the more he lowered his guard.
As Woo-Jin struggled and appeared vulnerable, Kim Seok-Hyung felt momentarily conflicted. He was busy thinking whether or not it would be better for him to give Woo-Jin some room for negotiation before the press conference.
— I’m only saying this because I feel bad for you, but if Jang Soo-Hwan abandons you and you have nowhere to go, come to me. I’ve known you since you were a child. I'll be magnanimous with you because of my affection for you during all those years.
Kim Seok-Hyung intentionally spoke to him in a kind voice, but Woo-Jin had to bite his tongue to hold himself back from laughing after hearing it. Putting aside how Kim Seok-Hyung interpreted his slight groan, Woo-Jin kept failing to fully get into the character he was acting this time around. Had he been shooting an actual scene right now, he would have gotten a lot of bad takes, so he sighed. Fortunately, however, there was sorrow in his voice, just like he intended.
“All I can hear is you telling me that you’ll put out the fire after starting it[1].”
After hearing Chae Woo-Jin’s weak voice and sigh, Kim Seok-Hyung tried to comfort Woo-Jin with an unusually cheerful voice.
— Think about it carefully — do you think a neat freak like Jang Soo-Hwan will just let this scandal slide? No, he won’t! But, I will accept you because of who I am as a person.
“But according to the article, you’re not magnanimous at all, though?”
The article stated that Kim Seok-Hyung had released Woo-Jin from TM because he couldn’t tolerate the idea of his own artiste getting a sponsor. Judging from the contents of the article alone, Kim Seok-Hyung was the neat freak here. However, it didn’t make sense for him to tell Woo-Jin to go back to TM.
— Well, about that….
“In fact, I heard Lee Yeon hyung accepted the sponsorship you wanted me to take. You put up with him, so there's no reason for you to kick me out since I didn't do anything.”
As soon as Woo-Jin said that in a scornful voice, sounding completely different than before, Kim Seok-Hyung jumped from his seat and yelled.
— How did you! No, I mean, I don’t know what you’re talking about right now.
“Yeah, I have no idea what you’re talking about either. But don’t you want to know how I found out the truth about Lee Yeon hyung?”
Woo-Jin quietly asked Kim Seok-Hyung a question, which the latter couldn’t readily answer. Even though his sorrowful, pleading voice sounded completely different, the flustered Kim Seok-Hyung was unaware of the difference.
“You’ll find out soon.”
Woo-Jin hung up immediately without waiting for Kim Seok-Hyung’s response. Kim Seok-Hyung called him back in a hurry, but Woo-Jin didn’t answer and turned his phone off.
“Woo-Jin, it’s time.”
Side Story. I had a dream.
Kim Tae-Hwa agonized over what to do as she fiddled with the advance tickets for Red Enemy she had gotten from her senior, Jung Hyun-Min. Woo-Jin had given her two tickets to watch it with a friend. They were free passes that could be exchanged for the actual tickets for her preferred time slot at the theater whenever she wanted.
She was at a loss because she didn’t have any friends to watch the movie with. After entering college, she had always been busy with either her part-time job or preparing for exams. She didn’t really enjoy watching movies, so she placed the tickets between the pages of her book after contemplating for a while.
Kim Tae-Hwa had no opinions about the movie. She had only watched Red Enemy because of one film critic’s review she had read.
<I’m not unhappy because I’m not loved. It hurts because I can’t give up.>
It was strangely a heart-wrenching phrase. It was the feeling she experienced after finding out the unexplained pain in her neck was due to a fishbone stuck in her throat. So she took the movie ticket from her book and went to the theater. It was very spontaneous.
For some reason, she had gotten quite curious about the movie after reading the review. What kind of movie would make a critic write such a review?
She was worried as she heard the tickets had been getting sold out every day, but even though it wasn’t a good seat, it was still a weekday morning, so she could watch the movie at her desired time.
In truth, Kim Tae-Hwa didn’t quite like Chae Woo-Jin. To be precise, she didn’t hate him, but she didn’t understand the feelings of those people who blindly loved him. Even though she had more conversations and spent more time with him than his fans, she had never been attracted to him. When she looked at him, she felt some sort of chill in her heart. Perhaps, that was why she didn’t want to watch the movie. She would be in a tough spot if she were to constantly feel those emotions throughout the film.
However, Chae Woo-Jin was nowhere to be found in Red Enemy. No, she couldn’t sense his presence. She wondered if it was because he was an actor. All she could see was Prince Myeong-Hwan, not Chae Woo-Jin. But that didn’t necessarily mean it was a good thing.
— My heart has found its way here.
Prince Myeong-Hwan said to the eunuch. However, the eunuch grabbed him and tried to stop him till the very end. The prince then proceeded to tell him to leave, saying he should live at the very least.
— My heart is here too.
Both of them faced their enemies with a sword in one hand and a calm and peaceful look on their faces. Following their hearts, they were here to either save their lover or be by their master’s side and protect them till the very end.
“He’s such a selfish person….”
After watching the movie, the first thought that came to Kim Tae-Hwa’s mind was that Prince Myeong-Hwan was too much. However, after mulling over it for a bit, she realized Queen Moon-Jin and Queen Yoon were ultimately the ones who were selfish. Prince Myeong-Hwan was merely an individualist who remained true to his feelings. Nevertheless, she found him selfish because everyone might have been happy if he had given up.
“A person who can die for his lover but cannot give her what she wants.”
How great would it have been if Prince Myeong-Hwan had coveted the throne just like his mother and lover wanted? If that were the case, Yoon Hwa-Eun wouldn’t have become the queen, and Prince Myeong-Hwan wouldn’t have had to marry his wife, Lady Park.
“What did his wife even do to deserve this?”
In Kim Tae-Hwa’s opinion, it didn’t seem as though Lady Park had truly loved Prince Myeong-Hwan. At that time, the fate of women from noble families was to marry whoever they were matched with and spend their entire lives thinking they were destined to be together. Since Lady Park tied the knot with the prince, she must have tried her best to be faithful to him. But that didn’t mean it was okay for her to be neglected, unloved, and spend the rest of her life all by herself.
“Why do people have to sacrifice the innocent because they want to play with emotions?” Kim Tae-Hwa grumbled as she took the remaining ticket out of her wallet. She was still experiencing lingering feelings from the movie, but she wasn’t quite certain what they were. Kim Tae-Hwa had always hated such ambiguous feelings and decided to watch the movie again as she had time.
Unlike the first time, she booked a late afternoon show this time around. By the time she had finished watching the film, it was already evening. As Kim Tae-Hwa walked down the dark street after watching the movie, all she could think about was Prince Myeong-Hwan.
“It must be nice.”
When she first watched the movie, she hated and resented Prince Myeong-Hwan, but after watching it for the second time, for some reason, she felt envious of him and had a newfound respect for him as well. She was jealous of his unwavering ideals, dreams, and love. How could he be so firm? How could he be that fearless of not being loved?
If Prince Myeong-Hwan had been obsessed with being loved, he would’ve definitely become the king. He would’ve given up on his dreams and lived according to the wishes of his mother and lover. He would’ve tried his best to become the king and lead the life they wanted. In other words, just like Kim Tae-Hwa right now.
Kim Tae-Hwa had a dream. She wanted her parents and siblings to be proud of her social success. Her family had been disregarding her and giving her a hard time. If they were proud of her, they would feel sorry and shower her with love. This hope of hers was what made her who she was today. She had that dream only because she wanted love and approval.
Perhaps, that might not be her actual dream. That was the dream of a version of herself she had seen through the lens of her family members, and it was the same for the prince. He was definitely suited to be the king. However, it wasn’t his dream — it was Queen Moon-Jin and Yoon Hwa-Eun’s hope and dream.
Nonetheless, he wasn’t afraid of being hated and remained true to himself until the very end. Life and death were not very important to him. Wherever his heart went, his dreams and love would be found in the same place too.
“Where does my heart lie?”
As Kim Tae-Hwa walked, she suddenly found herself getting lost. With nowhere to go, she stood there blankly and kept asking herself what her dream was. Did her dream exist only because she wanted to be loved, or was it truly for herself?
And then, she finally came to a realization.
“I wanted to be loved by others…but I didn’t love myself.”
If she had loved herself, she wouldn’t have lived like this just to be acknowledged and loved by her family. If she loved herself, she wouldn't be afraid of not being loved by others. However, she wasn’t like this because she had done something wrong — it was only natural as nobody had properly showered her with love since she was born. Her family members were to be blamed for not teaching her how to love; it wasn’t her fault. There was no reason for her to blame herself because she was innocent. And there was no need for her to hate them for not loving her. Like Prince Myeong-Hwan, they were merely living their own lives.
A person had the right to love the person they wanted to love, regardless of whether they were happy or unhappy being with them. There was no need to be sad because they didn’t love you back. Naturally, as a family member and a human being, it was inevitable to feel resentful toward those who failed to do what was right. But it would be too unfair to destroy one’s life because of them.
“If I love myself, I can go wherever my heart goes….” Then perhaps, she wouldn’t be afraid of anything.
Kim Tae-Hwa had a dream. But the dream shattered and scattered everywhere like broken pieces of porcelain in an instant. They quickly spread through the air in the dark night, leaving not a single trace behind.
“Ha~!”
Strangely enough, it became easier to breathe.
1. The original Korean idiom is 병 주고 약 준다, which directly translates to ‘giving someone sickness and then giving them the medicine.’ The English equivalent is ‘carry fire in one hand and water in the other.’ ☜