Am I A God?-Chapter 84: Matcha in Despair

Translator: Sparrow Translations Editor: Sparrow Translations

On the other side of the window, Matcha was posing before the gleaming mirror.

“This doesn’t make sense.”

“Why is this happening?”

“Am I not the perfect balance of cute and handsome?”

“Aren’t my adorable white paws attractive?”

He could not wrap his head around why he was receiving zero attention from the customers.

Matcha turned around to observe them. Apart from the ones playing mobiles games or doing work, most of the other guests were fawning over Elizabeth. A couple of them were playing with Mango. Even Roly Poly was in the loving arms of a little girl.

It was a depressing sight. 𝑓𝚛𝚎ℯ𝘸𝙚𝘣𝚗𝘰νeƖ.c𝒐𝐦

As his mood took another nosedive, he noticed Ms. Mayer.

She was still like a statue, her mind whirling with questions about the cafe’s popularity.

Sensing an opportunity, Matcha pounced forward and placed his paws against the window. He widened his eyes, dilated his pupils and put on an angelic expression for the middle-aged woman.

All Matcha asked for was some attention, but he continued to fail in receiving it.

Ms. Mayer was too consumed with making sense of the cafe’s inexplicable popularity to bother with the LiHua cat staring creepily at her.

She rolled her eyes and stormed off, wondering, “Are there a lot of cat lovers now? Is that why these cafes can command so many customers?”

Her eye roll felt like salt rubbing against Matcha’s emotional wounds. Crestfallen, he watched her retreating figure in defeated silence.

“Maybe...I’m not cute at all?”

In truth, Matcha was cute. However, he did not exist on the same level of cuteness as Mango and Elizabeth. The two cats belonged to pedigree breeds. They were rarer and more beautiful, and this was especially pronounced when they were among a bunch of common tabby cats.

Of course, Matcha did not understand this. He ambled forward, each step slow and heavy, hoping to hide under a table for the rest of time. As He thought that all hope was lost, he heard a voice call out.

“Hmm? This cat is, like, pretty cute if you take a closer look.”

The girl’s voice broke Matcha’s depressive spell. His eyes lit up as he raised his head to see Leigh Zhao bent forward, looking in his direction.

Matcha was ecstatic. He literally jumped for joy as he thundered towards her, ready to give her, or rather, her calf, a huge hug.

“Go away, Ginger,” she demanded before Matcha could reach her, “Don’t block my view.”

With that, Leigh used her leg to push Matcha away.

The cat fell to the ground and watched in despair as Leigh lifted Dust Ball, who had been behind Matcha, into her arms.

“You’re a tiny thing!” she giggled, “Baby animals are truly the cutest ever. You’re, like, the size of my palm.”

Dust Ball was not having any of this fondling. She shot Leigh a cross look, then squeezed out of her grip. She hissed at her and bared her sharp, angular teeth before jumping out of her hands and onto the ground, darting from view.

Leigh laid her hands on her chest in surprise, “This kitty is super fierce.”

“Even stupid Dust Ball is more popular than me,” Matcha wailed, scrambling towards the cat bathroom, “I will never talk to a human ever again! I hate all of you! I hate this superficial world!”

Roly Poly, who was at the other end of the cafe, was having a much better time than Matcha. He remained expressionless as the little girl scratched his tummy. However, he was actually trying his hardest not to burst out laughing from the ticklish touches. He took so much effort that his tummy was contracted into folds.

Matcha, true to his word, remained hidden in the bathroom until the end of the night.

After the cafe was closed for the day, Zhao Yao sat down to calculate the profits and expenses.

In five days, Cat Haven Coffee House had earned close to RMB 4,000. He thought this was a decent amount since the cafe was still new and needed time to cultivate a good reputation.

As he expected, the Celestial Beats were effective in motivating customers to return time and again. The repeat customer rate was already more than 90%. This could only get better and draw more customers over time.

“Maybe one day, we can even time the visits. One drink only buys you one hour at the cafe. If you want to stay longer, you’ll have to buy another,” he thought gleefully.

The only downside of the cafe’s expanding business was the reduced amount of time he could spend on his daily missions.

Recently, he could only patrol his neighborhood with either Matcha or Elizabeth in tow. Training and play for the supercats could only be restricted to the confines of the cafe.

However, today, he had a different plan in mind.

First, he dropped Shi Yu off at the public bus stop. Then, he drove Baiquan and the four supercats home. After some rest, he headed to the zoo with Elizabeth and Matcha.

“Carnivores spotted partying in the zoo?” he laughed, scrolling down the information recorded on his phone, “Jeez, someone even saw a tiger dancing.”

He never once imagined that supercats would appear in the zoo.

Elizabeth was curled up in the shotgun seat of the Panamera, grooming herself religiously. She could still sense the scent of the customers in her fur.

Matcha had flopped down in the leg space beneath the seat, unmoving and expressionless.

Zhao Yao pursed his lips when he spotted Matcha in such low spirits.

“Silly cat, when are you going to stop wallowing in self-pity?” he started, “I know you’ve spent the whole afternoon hidden in the bathroom today. If you do that again tomorrow, I’ll count you as absent. That means no character skins of rewards at the end of the month.”

Matcha turned his head to face his owner, a doleful look on his face.

“It doesn’t matter. No one likes me anyway. None of the guests wanted to hug me or touch me. I’m better off hidden in the bathroom.”

“Tsk,” Elizabeth shot Matcha a side-eye, “I agree, Zhao Yao. Useless cats can just stay at home. No one would want to play with them anyway. The cafe can just rely on me.”

Matcha did not retaliate. Instead, he raised his paws to cover his head, as if trying to hide from view.

“Actually, Matcha,” Zhao Yao said, “There are ways to be more popular.”

The ginger cat did not respond. However, there was a twitch in his ears, so he was listening.

Zhao Yao took this as permission to continue.

“Elizabeth and Mango are so popular because they are pedigree cats. They are meant to take part in championships, so they were bred to be beautiful. They’re also rare.”

“Tabby cats are a lot more commonplace, no? People like rare things, so they’re more excited to see Elizabeth and Mango,” he finished.

Zhao Yao’s words only served to inspire more despair in Matcha. He flipped onto his back like a dead fish and looked at him miserably.

“Just leave me be,” he moaned, “I’m just a useless cat. Just let me rot at home and play Mobile Legends every day.”

“You little rascal! You’re still thinking about slacking at home?” Zhao Yao thought to himself.

He kept these comments to himself. To Matcha, he suggested, “You may not be a pedigree cat, but you can pretend to be one.”

Matcha’s furry ears twitched again.

Even Elizabeth turned to him, swishing her tail. “You can pretend to be one?”

Zhao Yao laughed.

“You’ve seen Scottish Folds, yes? Matcha, that’s what you can pretend to be. I know you can control your ears. They stick flat to your heads like the wings of a plane when you’re scared, excited, or relaxed. Just flatten your ears like Scottish Folds. I think that’ll work.”