You Promised to Be an Idle Son-in-Law, How Could You Become a Land Immortal?-Chapter 64: The Inevitable Cannot Be Dodged

When Pei Guanli heard this, she forgot all about dealing with the scoundrels who dared to badmouth her brother-in-law and came running over excitedly.

She was dressed in the unique attire of the Mountain Race: an alternating red and blue dress, adorned with silver accessories.

As she moved, the bell on her necklace swayed gently, like a fluttering butterfly.

JINGLE, JINGLE, JINGLE.

"Brother-in-law, what’s this good stuff you mentioned?"

"Come inside with me and you’ll find out."

Chen Yi finished speaking with a stiff smile and pulled Pei Guanli straight into the main hall.

Not only that, but he also quietly beckoned to Xiao Jinghong, who was busy arranging the head table.

Without a second thought, Xiao Jinghong followed them.

Once Chen Yi whispered in her ear and she understood what Pei Guanli had done, she immediately shut the door.

Pei Guanli, clearly unaware of the gravity of the situation, crossed her fair, delicate feet and asked with a giggle:

"Brother-in-law, where’s this good stuff you were talking about? Does Sister Jinghong get some too... ah?"

"Sister Jinghong, no! Don’t... don’t hit me."

"Sob, sob... Brother-in-law, help me, help..."

While Xiao Jinghong was dealing with Pei Guanli, Chen Yi slipped out of the main hall. Seeing Chen Yunfan still standing by the door, he offered his thanks.

Chen Yunfan smiled. "Brother Yi, your attitude is certainly much better than it was yesterday."

Chen Yi nodded, his eyes on the crowd in the courtyard. "You’re a bit different today too, brother."

"Oh? Tell me, how so?"

"You’re not acting as high and mighty as you were yesterday."

Chen Yunfan’s smile froze. "Brother Yi, are you teasing me?"

"Today is the Old Marquis’s birthday banquet. With so many dignitaries present, no matter how much I like to fool around, even I wouldn’t dare act out of line here."

Chen Yi smiled, noting the gazes of the other guests. He changed the subject, "Brother, you must know about the Holy Emperor’s verbal decree. I wonder what your thoughts are on it?"

Hearing this, Chen Yunfan’s expression turned woeful. "Brother Yi, are you showing off?"

Chen Yi shook his head, momentarily speechless. "You misunderstand, brother. I’m just... surprised. I’ve already married into the Xiao Family, and I’m thousands of miles from the Capital Prefecture."

He looked at Chen Yunfan and asked with a serious expression, "Why would the Holy Emperor show me such special favor?"

Chen Yunfan recalled his meeting with the Hawk the previous night and said evasively, "Well, I suppose he genuinely finds your talents to be exceptional."

"Do you really think so, brother?"

"Of course. I never lie."

’You just hedge with half-truths, don’t you?’

Chen Yi understood. He patted Chen Yunfan’s shoulder, smiled, said, "Excuse me, brother, please make yourself at home," and turned to head back into the main hall.

Chen Yunfan froze. He glanced at the shoulder that had been patted, his eyes following Chen Yi’s retreating figure for a moment.

’Brother Yi... did he discover that I know Martial Arts?’

Chen Yi closed the door to the main hall and thought to himself, ’So, my brother really does know Martial Arts. It seems he’s also deliberately hiding his true abilities.’

’But why?’

Chen Yi had no way of knowing, but he imagined the reason was likely different from his own for hiding his skills.

After all, how could a mere idle, live-in son-in-law possibly compare to the reigning Imperial Top Scholar?

Just then, Xiao Jinghong, having finished disciplining Pei Guanli, was wondering what to do with her. When she saw him come in, she immediately said:

"Husband, you need to make her give those people the antidote."

Chen Yi snapped out of his thoughts. "Me?"

A flash of embarrassed anger crossed Xiao Jinghong’s beautiful eyes, visible beneath her half-armor. "She won’t listen to me."

Chen Yi looked at Pei Guanli, who was sulking with her round cheeks puffed out, and nodded with a smile. "My lady, there are many guests in the courtyard. Why don’t you go attend to them first?"

Xiao Jinghong agreed and left the main hall.

A moment of silence.

Chen Yi and the pouting Pei Guanli stared at each other, and then both inexplicably broke into laughter.

As their laughter died down, Pei Guanli said indignantly, "You rotten brother-in-law! I was getting revenge for you, and you still let Sister Jinghong hit me. Hmph."

Chen Yi sat down beside her, reached out, and pinched her cheek. "You have to pick the right time and place for revenge, you silly girl."

"Bu’ vebenge shoud be taben on ’e spot."

"Today is Elder Master Xiao’s birthday. The guests are all rich and powerful. If they found out you used poison, it would put the Elder Master in a difficult position and bring great shame upon the Xiao Family."

Looking at the still-clueless Pei Guanli, Chen Yi couldn’t help but recall that night when she had knocked out Armored Warriors one after another, crashing her way deep into the Marquis’s Mansion.

Clearly, Pei Guanli didn’t understand social intricacies. She likely only had a vague concept of right and wrong.

Thinking this, Chen Yi let go of her cheek. "In any case, your actions were a bit reckless. If something like this happens again, remember to be discreet."

Pei Guanli blinked, asking blankly, "So, you’re not angry, brother-in-law?"

"You taught those loudmouths a lesson for me, why would I be angry? However... if you don’t go and undo the poisoning, I probably won’t be able to take you out to have fun anymore."

"I’ll go right now!"

Pei Guanli shot to her feet and ran for the door. Just as she opened it, she paused and looked back at Chen Yi, her smile blossoming like a flower. "You’re the best, brother-in-law!"

With that, she left the main hall.

Chen Yi watched her leave in a flurry, smiling and shaking his head.

’She’s not a bad kid.’

’It’s just that in her world, everything is simply black or white.’

’A person like that is rare indeed.’

...

Despite its many twists and turns, Old Marquis Xiao’s birthday banquet did not miss the auspicious hour.

The ancestral rites were performed in the early morning, guests were welcomed at mid-morning, and by noon, everyone was seated for the presentation of gifts.

First came the birthday respects.

The guests paid their respects in order of rank: first the officials, then the noble families, and finally the commoners. For the most part, Civil Servants bowed with clasped hands, while Military Generals knelt.

Next was the presentation of birthday gifts.

Following the traditions of the Wei Dynasty, most guests presented the Old Marquis with gifts such as jade-carved Military Tokens or famous swords.

Though not necessarily extravagant, these gifts were appropriate and followed etiquette, avoiding any transgression that might set tongues wagging.

Interestingly, the calligraphy scrolls presented by Chen Yunfan and Pei Guanli were identical, right down to the signature at the end.

How could Chen Yi not realize that Pei Guanli must have run into Chen Yunfan last night?

Before the Tiger Girl could fly into a temper, he deflated her with a single question. "So, tell me, what exactly were you up to last night?"

Pei Guanli grinned sheepishly. With a quick glance at Xiao Jinghong beside her, she instantly forgot all about Chen Yunfan.

She had already gotten a beating for poisoning the guests. If Sister Jinghong found out what she’d done last night, she’d surely get another one.

She wasn’t that foolish.

Finally, it was the turn of the Xiao family.

After some polite deference to one another, Elder Master Xiao finally spoke with a smile, letting the distant relatives from the Xiao Family Branches begin.

A member of a branch family, now residing in Jing State, stood up. He took out a prepared ancient painting and recited a blessing.

Elder Master Xiao chuckled and nodded, then had a servant take the gift.

The second and third members followed, until it was the turn of the Second House.

Xiao Qiuyun, who was married to the distant Duke Qian, rose with a smile. "First Uncle, your niece originally came for Jinghong’s wedding, so this birthday gift was prepared in a hurry. It’s just a pair of Oily Yellow Stones from Shou Mountain. Please don’t look down on it."

Of course, Elder Master Xiao wouldn’t look down on it. "We’re family; there’s no need for such ceremony. Oily Yellow Stone is a prized material for seals. Later, I’ll find a master carver, and Old Zhang and I can each have one made."

The Old Duke, Zhang Xuan, laughed and chided, "You’re quite good at regifting, aren’t you?"

Elder Master Xiao retorted, "And are you a Buddha?"

"If you’re the one offering, then I am..."

After Xiao Qiuyun came Xiao Dongchen, who, as was his custom, presented a piece of calligraphy. It was neither exceptional nor cliché.

After the Second House, it was the First House’s turn.

Xiao Xuanshuo presented a Jade Sword.

Xiao Jinghong presented her tortoiseshell carving, which drew much admiration from the crowd.

Xiao Wan’er had prepared several large, hundred-year-old ginseng roots. No wonder she had made a special trip to Jing State.

By the time it was Chen Yi’s turn, the guests were already starving.

He took out the calligraphy scroll he had prepared, offered a few simple words of blessing, and prepared to sit down.

Elder Master Xiao smiled and nodded, offered a few words of encouragement, and had a servant take the scroll away, preparing to start the feast.

But just then, Mr. Yue Ming, who had been silent until now, spoke up. "Marquis Xiao, a moment, please."

"Hm?" Old Marquis Xiao frowned at him. "Yue Ming, what is it?"

He had been muttering to himself earlier when he saw the masters from Guiyun Academy, wondering what their purpose for coming was.

Especially Mr. Yue Ming. The two of them had been at odds since they were young.

For him to show up now to celebrate his birthday inevitably made Old Marquis Xiao think, ’A fox guarding the henhouse.’

Mr. Yue Ming ignored him, his eyes fixed on the scroll in the Household Servant’s hands. "Why not open that scroll and let us all have a look?"

Chen Yi and Xiao Jinghong exchanged a glance, both thinking, ’What’s coming can’t be avoided.’

Old Marquis Xiao was puzzled, but seeing the look they exchanged, he guessed something was afoot.

But he was a veteran of the battlefield for decades, a shrewd and seasoned man. He certainly wasn’t going to pass up a chance to mess with his "old rival."

"In my opinion, let’s just forget it."

"Yue Ming, while I am delighted you came to celebrate my birthday, you have neither presented a gift nor offered a blessing. You put me in a very difficult position."

As soon as he finished speaking, Mr. Yue Ming understood his intent, and his face darkened.

"Marquis Xiao, you are two years my junior."

"And this is *my* birthday banquet."

"..."

The other guests didn’t know the full story, but watching the two sixty-year-old men bicker didn’t stop them from enjoying the show.

Those few who knew about their rivalry, in particular, couldn’t stop laughing.

Duke Qian, Zhang Xuan, and Sun Fu, for example, were just short of waving flags and cheering from the sidelines.

But clearly, Mr. Yue Ming had come prepared. Eager to get a look at the new style of calligraphy, he silenced the other masters with a gesture and forced a smile:

"I wish you, Marquis Xiao, fortunes as vast as the East Sea, and a life as long as... Wumeng Mountain!"

"Hahaha, excellent..."

Old Marquis Xiao was overjoyed and ordered the servant to open the scroll immediately.

The brocade box was opened, and the string binding the scroll was untied. The Household Servant took one end of the scroll and gave it a flick.

The scroll unfurled in an instant.

On the brocade backing, the surface of the Yunsong Paper was pristine. One by one, characters drawn with bold, unrestrained strokes were revealed.

Under the bright daylight, a gentle, jade-like radiance began to emanate from the scroll.

Immediately, someone cried out in astonishment, "The characters... they’re glowing with brilliance?!"