TRANSMIGRATED WITH A HYPERMARKET SYSTEM-Chapter 148 - 3: HIS HEART

Secrets can be deadly and keeping one for far too long can make one do crazy things that in most cases will make one regret it in the end.

His greatest crime was that he was spineless and a great coward. Instead of protecting the one person that he loved, he ruthlessly watched hidden in a corner as his beloved, his secret crush got handled.

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Like a coward, he could only secretly cry while in hiding and buried the love that never blossomed in his heart.

He still remembered the first time that he saw her, her smile was so bright that he completely fell at first sight. Her aptitude was very low and bad but she was very hard working and everyone saw that.

Maybe that was the reason why the elders didn’t kick her out but let her serve in the sect even when she failed to break through the threshold.

When she was struggling to be an outer sect disciple, he had already managed to be one of the inner disciples. And the time he spent cultivating made it so that he couldn’t be able to see his beloved as much as he wanted.

His reason for not confessing when he should have was that, ’I want to get stronger first before I do that. There are so many powerful people out there in the world and if one day something happens, I may not be able to protect her.’

However, deep down in his heart he knew that he was shamed to confess to her. His family and clan were all looking up to him and if it was known that he fancies a nobody with poor cultivation aptitude, he will be looked down upon and he didn’t want that at all.

He didn’t want people to laugh at him and look down on him. He wouldn’t let that happen, at least his woman should be someone that brings honor not just to him but to the family as well.

So as cowardly as he was, he never confessed and he witnessed the whole process of his beloved being tortured and left for dead.

If he had been courageous enough, he could have saved her life. He could have done something but he didn’t do anything. He turned a blind eye and simply erased all his traces and acted as if he didn’t see anything.

And for years, this daunted him so much that even when his clan forced him to marry some girl, he just accepted but he wasn’t happy.

The nightmares were simply too horrific for him that he knew that if he wanted to get rid of all this, he needed to find some news regarding her. And for years, filled with so much guilt, he searched for her and after so many years, he finally found her.

But when he did find her, it was already too late. She had become an existence that he can only look at from afar. In this life, he will never get another chance to look at her openly as he did before.

It was even impossible to find her and even ask for forgiveness or confess his cowardly feelings. He felt like a joke.

To think that the person who was left for dead had become an existence that dined with kings and queens, everywhere one goes, there will be news of her and what made things worse was how not one organization wanted to fight against her.

How could they even dare fight with her when so many powerful people failed and even suffered immensely?

As if to torture himself, he stayed around Dark Forest to watch the person who haunted his heart. Her great achievements were all there out in the open for everyone to see. So how could he even dare to try to approach her?

He saw several influential figures who were just fighting for a chance to sit down with her for a few minutes, royalty, merchants, and so on and yet no one entered her heart.

He didn’t know whether she has someone or not but one thing was for sure, she was surely happy and her life was much better than any of theirs.

Alayna and her group of kids were a beautiful sight to see and it really hurt because he knew that there was no place for him there.

After feeding himself with so many aching memories, he was forced to accept reality and went back home.

Since he couldn’t be with the person he failed to protect, because he was a coward before then he may as well cherish what he has now.

He knew that he didn’t deserve his wife and concubines, he was a failure of a husband and a father but now that his heart had finally seen things through, he was going to spend his entire life making it up to those that were by his side.

As for Alayna, he will continually pray for forgiveness without meeting the other. Even if the darkness devours him and nightmares continue to haunt him, he will grit his teeth and accept it all.

Of course, Alayna had no idea that on the day when she thought that she lost it all, someone was there, watching like a spectator, and just like a coward, the person fled.

If the person had been there and lend a hand, maybe things would have been different but it no longer mattered now anymore.

Everyone’s fate is already decided from birth, some love to defy fate and spend their life fighting against it but somehow, fate has ways to bring back everything in order.

He didn’t know what happened to her after she was saved but he was glad that she didn’t die but survived otherwise his guilt would have swallowed him up, not that it was too much considering how he still willingly took in more concubines during this period.

The man lived with darkness for his entire life but who cares? He brought this on himself and he only has himself to blame for this.