The Return of the Crazy Demon-Chapter 277: Save the Bullshit for the Martial Alliance

The air turned heavy the moment the Demonic Cult was mentioned. Not because of me, though.

The All-Encompassing Gate Master immediately ordered one of his officers out.

“Prepare the message and send the runner.”

“Yes, Gate Master.”

He turned to me.

“The distance isn’t far, but we’ll have to wait for replies.”

“Obviously.”

“Thunderclap Gate is closer, so their response will likely come first.”

He gestured toward the Du River Wine.

“Again, I don’t use poison. The only reason Fort Mak hasn't descended into all-out chaos is that we agreed not to use poison. If any side crossed that line, the other two would unite and strike them down. But who knows how long that balance will last. Honestly, we don’t even know much about poison. All we’ve ever known is war.”

That military background was definitely showing.

I looked around at the Gate Master and his officers.

“Do you know how All-Encompassing Gate could unite the underworld of Fort Mak and survive without collecting tribute?”

I didn’t expect an answer. These were underworld thugs, not men of vision. The officers glanced at one another before all looking at their master.

He replied.

“No, I don’t.”

I gave him a simple answer.

“Work.”

“Hmm.”

“But I’m guessing you’d rather die than work. I get it. You’re descendants of generals who once received government rations. Staying up all night drinking and dragging your ass out of bed at dawn isn’t easy. If you were someone harvesting herbs on a mountain to sell at the market, you’d be up before sunrise, taking a last glance at your sleeping wife and kid before heading out. But an underworld thug waking up early to work? Impossible.”

“......”

“Sure, you all probably find the idea of labor repulsive. But do you think anyone works because they like it? Gate Master, people who don’t know martial arts aren’t idiots. They all have reasons for rising before dawn—just like you have reasons for avoiding work. If you’re going to keep leeching off others and living in luxury, shouldn’t you at least consider where that money comes from? You’re old enough to ask yourself that.”

The Gate Master stared at me without flinching.

“Even the term ‘underworld’ has the word ‘Way’ in it. But how do you attach that word to people who just steal other people’s money? That’s not the essence of the underworld. I don’t care if you’re idle by nature. But if All-Encompassing Gate turned its mission to solving unfairness in Fort Mak and helping merchants do their business with less hardship... would those merchants really let you starve to death? Like I said—people aren’t stupid. Just because they don’t know martial arts doesn’t mean they don’t know decency.”

I picked up the Du River Wine cup.

“...If this turns out to be poisoned, I plan to kill every one of you before the poison spreads through my body. So don’t look too pleased about me drinking it. Anyone want to stop me? No?”

I downed the drink.

Of course, there was no poison.

In truth, all the officers here, including the Gate Master, were older than me. But age means nothing. We all live with death on our shoulders.

There’s no pecking order in ascension.

Amid the heavy mood, one of the officers asked me,

“I heard you fought the Demonic Cult quite some time ago. What’s the current status?”

“What kind of question is that? Are you wondering why I’m still alive?”

“That’s not what I meant. It’s just... since the Cult Leader is one of the Three Calamities...”

“The only reason I’m still alive is because he’s one of the Three Calamities. He’s got two rivals just like him. If he were the only Calamity, I’d already be dead. He’s probably trying to figure out how to overcome the other two. And he knows sending a few skilled subordinates won’t kill me either. I’m well past that level. I’m a pain in the ass to everyone. But Gate Master.”

“Yes?”

“While I’m busy figuring out how to eventually fight the Cult Leader, you’re busy emptying the pockets of merchants. Impressive underworld career. Your ancestors must be proud—turning in their graves. Is that the extent of Sun Woo-jin's martial ability and character? Your ancestor died a defeated general, but living like this—you might as well have lost without ever going to war.”

His officers looked down at the ground.

They seemed pissed that their leader was being insulted, but since Sun Woo-jin remained calm, no one dared to speak.

He simply nodded.

“There’s much I lack.”

“So do I. I came to Jianghu because I hated being robbed. I had no money, wasn’t from a noble family. But I knew I wasn’t an idiot. Even when I was working as a tavern boy, I survived every day with the mindset of ‘Just wait, you bastards.’ And that’s how I got here.”

As I kept grilling them, the runner sent to Thunderclap Gate returned. We heard his sprinting footsteps from outside, and then the stairs creaked as he came up—steam rising from his whole body.

Even before he spoke, I could tell from his face what the message was.

“Gate Master, I’ve returned.”

“What did they say?”

The runner cleared his throat and replied.

“I apologize for what I’m about to say...”

“......”

“I delivered the letter and relayed the warning. But the Thunderclap Gate Master said...”

“Just say it. We all know they’ve got no manners.”

“Yes, sir. He said he didn’t believe that the Haomun Master was actually here... and told me to take that nighttime bullshit to the Martial Alliance. I’m sorry.”

“You’ve got nothing to apologize for. Understood. Take a rest.”

“Yes, sir.”

Sun Woo-jin, who had been restraining his emotions well so far, now had a twisted expression on his face.

I snorted.

“Nighttime bullshit, huh... The Alliance Leader’s not some village chief. I’m a Gate Master of an allied sect—his comrade who helped strike down the Southern Forest Bandits. I’m adding ‘insulting the Alliance Leader’ to their list of crimes.”

A horse neighed loudly outside—someone must’ve yanked its reins hard. Then we heard someone sprinting up the stairs like a battlefield messenger. The runner from Sky Hawk Gang had returned.

His report was similar.

He had a bright red handprint on his cheek. But he reported in a composed tone.

“Gate Master, the Sky Hawk Gang Leader said...”

“Yes. What did he say?”

“He told me to go to sleep early if I’m drunk. And if I have something to say, he’ll call for us himself at Moonwater Pavilion.”

Sun Woo-jin’s eye twitched violently.

“I see. Why the slap?”

The runner answered confidently.

“He just said, ‘Come here for a sec,’ and then hit me.”

Sun Woo-jin nodded.

“You held it in well. Go rest.”

“Yes, sir.”

He looked at me.

“I hope you won’t misunderstand. We’ve never had a good relationship. They probably thought saying you were here was just a ruse to lure them to Moonwater Pavilion. Or they think someone like you would never bother coming here. Since you’re close to the Martial Alliance Leader, they assumed you wouldn’t associate with us, and dismissed it all as nonsense.”

I nodded.

“You keep saying ‘bullshit’ and I’m starting to feel like a dog. Guess I’ll show them what a real dog looks like. Those bastards...”

One officer made a strange face, so I asked,

“You laughing?”

“No, sir.”

I glanced around at the officers.

“Even better. As of today, the Thunderclap and Sky Hawk leaders are retired. This is why a sect’s leader is important. Caution. Decency. If they’d had «N.o.v.e.l.i.g.h.t» even one of the two, their sects wouldn’t be falling apart.”

On the other hand, the All-Encompassing Gate Master had both—caution and decency.

I stood up and took off my tattered floral robe, then looked at the officers wearing black robes with the character for ‘All-Encompassing’ on the shoulder.

“Give me one of your uniforms. I look like a bum.”

One officer handed over a uniform, and I draped it over myself.

“Which one’s closer?”

“Thunderclap Gate is.”

“Here’s what we’ll do. Just the officers, the Gate Master, and me—we’re the only ones going.”

Sun Woo-jin looked startled.

“Thunderclap Gate has over a hundred men.”

“Don’t care. This underworld crap means nothing in the face of overwhelming force.”

Distrust was practically spilling from their eyes. One officer voiced it aloud.

“Master, your hand is still injured—will you be okay?”

“I got it from herb-picking, not combat. Enough bullshit. Just get me the hardest, meanest club you’ve got. And a bandage. My palm stings.”

“Ah, understood.”

***

Even counting the officers, there were only twelve of us. Some of the All-Encompassing Gate’s subordinates tried to join, but the officers stopped them. I wrapped the bandage around my hand, gripped the club, then wrapped the bandage around it again. The club and I became one.

I looked at the officers and spoke plainly.

“Let’s go.”

I mingled with the underworld and marched toward Thunderclap Gate. The moonlight was perfect for a night raid—shining down like it was rooting for us. I walked briskly and asked an officer,

“What’s the Thunderclap Gate Master look like?”

“He’s got a mustache that drops straight down from the corners of his lips. Yellowish face. Uses a greatsword.”

“Hard to miss, then.”

“Correct.”

“Some sects have leaders way stronger than their subordinates. Others are filled with similarly skilled fighters. Which type is Thunderclap Gate?”

“Their leader is significantly stronger.”

“Not bad. That means I just need to beat the hell out of one guy. Leave the rest to me. Even within a sect, there’s a huge difference between members. If someone’s always acted like a piece of shit—kill him. If someone’s generally behaved decently—just break his limbs.”

“Understood.”

A voice behind me asked,

“Wouldn’t it be better to run? They might be preparing.”

“We walk. No point wearing myself out before the fight. And if that bastard could prepare, he would've come out politely in the first place. What’s his name?”

“Jeon In-pyeong.”

“What’s In-pyeong usually doing at this hour?”

“Almost certainly drinking.”

“Figures...”

I like drinking too, so I didn’t insult him for it.

As we walked, a mansion appeared that put All-Encompassing Gate to shame.

“Wait, that’s the place?”

“Yes.”

“Wow. Rich bastard.”

It looked like a castle rose from the center of that estate. The walls around it were so short in comparison they looked useless. I glanced at Sun Woo-jin.

“Gate Master, come in with your officers. Watch your people.”

“Got it.”

Suddenly, I sprinted forward, leapt to the wall, bounded off it into the air, and landed on the roof of the grand three-story building. From there, I launched myself again—higher—to the third floor. As the gate crashed open behind me, I smashed a window with my club and entered.

No one was on the third floor. I called for my friend.

“...In-pyeong! You bastard, where are you?”

Thunderclap Gate’s guards charged down the hallway. I unleashed crescent-shaped cold energy from the club, filling the corridor. The incoming guards froze in mid-step.

I passed the half-frozen men and went down the stairs.

“Thunderclap Gate Master, I told you I was coming. I even sent a letter. You said to take the bullshit to the Martial Alliance? Let’s see that pretty face of yours.”

On the second floor, surrounded by guards, the Thunderclap Gate Master stared at me, bewildered.

“Who the hell are you?”

His face made me think of a mustached boar. The table was a mess of alcohol and snacks. I stepped up onto it, stomping on the food as I walked.

“It’s your retirement day.”

I fended off the incoming guards with simple downward swings of the club—just enough cold energy infused to make contact unavoidable. Bones cracked, screams echoed, a massive sword dropped from above.

As I broke their arms and legs, the Gate Master—who had been watching—finally drew his weapon and jumped in.

Even though I blocked with the cold-infused club, the greatsword cut halfway in. A powerful kick followed, filled with internal energy. I met it with my own palm strike.

BOOM!

The explosion of my energy pushed even me back. My ears rang as more blade winds poured in.

Based on his skill and depth of energy, he wasn’t someone Sun Woo-jin could handle easily.

I vaulted up, twisted midair, and launched a palm strike. As his blade wind passed beneath me, I crashed my club into his sword.

BOOM!

He stumbled, slammed into a wall, and bounced off—still swinging that huge sword with technique.

A proper, vicious underworld thug.

I blocked his strikes one by one, then tore off the cloth binding the club to my hand. At close range, I threw the club.

SHWIP!

As he batted it aside, I drew my wooden sword and slashed diagonally. Blood burst from his shoulder.

I stood my ground and swung the wooden sword slowly.

An X slash of cold energy.

Then a T slash with heat-infused energy.

Then a deceptive barrage of wind slashes, one after another. He was soon a bloodied mess, swinging wildly.

“Enough! I didn’t realize it was really you, Haomun Master! Let’s talk!”

I kept slashing. He fell back with every block. When his back hit the wall, he slumped down, covered in blood, face pale, coughing up blackened blood.

I sheathed the sword and approached, meeting his gaze.

“I sent a messenger to talk. This is how you respond, Thunderclap Gate Master?”

“......”

I grabbed his collar and threw him outside. The man’s large frame crashed through the window.

I stood at the shattered hole and looked down.

The fighters from Thunderclap and All-Encompassing Gate had stopped their clash and were now staring up at me.

“...Gate Master Jeon In-pyeong apparently has something to say to me, so all of you—shut your mouths.”

Jeon In-pyeong twitched on the ground, eventually sitting up. His hair was a mess, his body drenched in blood—the most pathetic sight in the area.

He glared up at me with resentment but said nothing.

But I had something to say.

“What the hell are you staring at? Isn’t this how underworld business works? Did I come to the wrong place? If you’re with the orthodox side, I’ll apologize for today’s rudeness.”

“......”

“No answer, huh? So you are underworld.”

Jeon In-pyeong opened his mouth in a drained voice.

“Haomun Master... what the hell...”

I cut him off.

“Shut it. Save the bullshit for the Martial Alliance.”

Suddenly, he dropped to all fours and sobbed. A seasoned underworld boss that old—crying?

Unbelievable.

“Too late, idiot.”

I turned to Sun Woo-jin.

“Tie him up.”

He looked at me and gave a slight nod.

“Yes, sir.”