The Return of the Crazy Demon-Chapter 259: A Man Like a Side Dish at Dinner

The rice was so good that I ate seriously.

Deok-soo hyung’s seasoning was sometimes intense enough to forget your worries, but the cook here was more composed with the seasoning. Maybe it was because there were so many side dishes and dishes served.

New dishes kept coming out over half a shichen. The food was so delicious, I thought this might be the reason they became one of the Great Clans.

On the other hand, I thought that if someone ate food like this every day, it’d be hard to adjust to food outside. Not all food out there tastes like this. Then again, the ones enjoying it right now—are they the sons and daughters of the Wi Clan, or just the three of us?

Probably us.

Because it was such a rare and luxurious feast, I overate.

I didn’t even know the names of the dishes, but the cuts were always clean, the slices thread-thin and evenly matched.

Stir-fried, grilled, fried, steamed, pan-fried, and boiled dishes came out in turn.

The meats included pork, fish, chicken, duck, beef, and lamb. There were even fruits I’d never seen before.

I could tell this was a special meal meant for honored guests. It seemed like the Wi Clan had a tradition of treating martial artists well.

Toward the end of the meal, Wi So-seon, who had been eating with us, asked me,

“Lord of the Sect, may I ask some questions about martial arts?”

“Go ahead.”

I had no idea what she’d ask. Coincidentally—or not—plum tea was served at the end. I spoke to the servant who brought it.

“...Tell the cook the meal was excellent.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Tell them it was Yi Zaha, Lord of Haomun, who said that.”

When I suddenly introduced myself, the servant replied with a surprised expression.

“Ah, yes, Lord of the Sect. I’ll pass that along to the kitchen.”

Only then did I pick up the teacup.

“Plum tea, huh? How delightful.”

Wi So-seon asked,

“Do you like plum tea?”

“I have a sworn brother, a young physician, who once said plum tea is good for fire sickness.”

Come to think of it, I think he told me to just drown it in alcohol instead.

Wi Tae-san asked,

“How did you come down with fire sickness?”

“Well, my grandfather left me an inn. It burned down for various reasons. I think it happened then. It’s rebuilt now, but... if it hadn’t burned, I probably would’ve just stayed there. That was my home. Once something’s wrapped in flame, it can’t be undone. The Wi Clan should be careful of arsonists too.” 𝐟𝕣𝕖𝐞𝐰𝕖𝚋𝐧𝗼𝚟𝐞𝕝.𝗰𝐨𝐦

“Yes, sir.”

I pointed at the Lecher.

“Be careful of people like this guy too.”

The young men of the Wi Clan and Wi So-seon all turned to look at the Lecher. He sighed.

“What? What did I do? What about me?”

I tattled in a serious tone.

“He didn’t come to fight, actually...”

“That’s enough.”

“Shall I stop?”

They probably understood. With three older brothers around, there shouldn't be any big problems. That was how I officially introduced the Lecher to the Wi Clan. He’s the bastard who came to peek at the beauties from the One Phoenix Two Immortals.

Wi So-seon asked me,

“What was the thunder energy you used earlier? I heard the Seomun Clan has experts in thunder energy, but this one seems different?”

“It is different. I can’t tell you the name of the technique. It’s a secret.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

“......”

There’s no need for them to get involved with the Scholar Faction. Knowing the name alone won’t link them to it, but still, spreading martial arts gifted by a scholar makes me uneasy.

“Did the Thunder Dragon Ascension leave a strong impression?”

“Yes.”

“Curious about how to counter it?”

Wi So-seon nodded.

“I am.”

Looking at the sons of the Wi Clan, I said,

“There’s no real counter to thunder energy. Same with Mongrang’s ice arts. They’re not techniques one can easily deal with. The martial arts we’ve learned are considered top-tier in Jianghu.”

Now that I think about it, I’ve learned three of these kinds of techniques. Wi Mu-gyeol, Wi Jung-cheon, Wi Tae-san, and Wi So-seon all looked at me with astonished expressions.

Wi Tae-san asked,

“Are you saying you’re invincible?”

I shook my head.

“Not at all. If your internal energy is deep enough, you can still respond.”

I’m not one of those internal energy supremacists, but in truth, the only way to counter ice arts or thunder energy is with overwhelming internal power. If your internal power is monstrous enough, even mastering just the Three Calamities Sword Arts could make you the best in the world—assuming you’re also strong as a person.

Wi So-seon asked the Drunk,

“Do you also train in such rare divine techniques, sir?”

The Drunk replied bluntly,

“No such technique for me. I’m too busy training swordsmanship.”

“You’re not envious?”

He shook his head.

“Not envious.”

“Why not?”

The Drunk gave her the correct answer.

“Miss Wi, both you and I have swords. Whether someone uses ice arts or thunder energy, if we can cut with our swords, that’s all that matters. It’s simply a matter of whether we’re skilled enough to do it or not.”

I chimed in,

“Well said.”

That was truly the answer of a swordsman—and, in fact, it was the correct answer. The brothers of the Wi Clan also smiled. Being swordsmen themselves, it seemed the Drunk’s words resonated with them most.

Wi So-seon looked at me.

“Do you agree, Lord of the Sect?”

Now that I noticed it, every time Wi So-seon asked a question, her brothers all looked at me with sparkling eyes. It was a time where the youngest was asking on behalf of the older brothers who were too prideful to ask directly.

It would’ve been funny to act like I knew too much in front of youths my age, but the Wi Clan’s children were too serious, so I couldn’t brush off the questions.

“Each martial art has its own characteristics. Once you reach the peak, their power probably levels out.”

Wi So-seon turned to the Lecher.

“Do you think the same, Lord Mong?”

A very diligent girl, this one.

The Lecher replied,

“My master trains in swordsmanship. I’m currently training in ice arts. My master once said that mastering ice arts alone could make one the best in the world. But that doesn’t mean my master looks down on swords. We just walk different paths. The destination is the same—for both me and my master.”

Now that I’ve set the stage, the Lecher wasn’t flirting with her.

The Drunk, after a good meal, acted dignified like the head of a clan.

Maybe it means that with proper respect and treatment, even those called demons can live like humans. At least while I’m watching, the two won’t stray too far. Of course, that doesn’t mean it’s easy for me either.

I explained the characteristics of ice arts to the Wi Clan children.

“If Lord Mong strikes your sword sheath with a chi-infused move before you can draw your sword, the ice energy may freeze the mechanism, stopping your draw altogether.”

“Ah.”

“Since your main technique is swordsmanship, a surprise strike from ice arts could leave you defeated before your sword is even drawn. That’s the unique power of ice arts. Defending your sheath with another chi move wouldn’t block the draw like ice does. Fully utilizing your learned martial arts is fundamental, but preparing counters to your opponent’s techniques is the true purpose of Biwu.”

Wi So-seon nodded.

“I understand.”

“Also, at Lord Mong’s level, just infusing ice chi into a wooden sword would block most longswords. So from the start, he likely chose the forged sword from Yongdu Cheolbang with the plan of using that advantage. There’s a psychological element too—if he breaks your sword, he likely figured the opponent’s mind would falter...”

Everyone, including the eldest, turned to look at the Lecher.

He replied with a grimace.

“...Why are you revealing every little detail about the duel?”

I nodded.

“Gotta earn your meal, you bandit.”

Wi So-seon asked us,

“Then should we also learn a distinctive divine technique?”

I shook my head.

“That’s a choice I can’t make for you. But techniques like thunder energy or ice arts can really only be mastered by one person. Without deep internal energy, it’s easy to fall into deviation, so they’re usually reserved for successors. Say you get a rare elixir—if you split it four ways, the effect drops. Worse, if you argue over who gets it, your internal unity breaks. It’s not easy. Besides, isn’t the sword enough? Lord Im of the Alliance is also a monstrously strong swordsman.”

Wi Jung-cheon suddenly chimed in.

“But doesn’t the Alliance Leader get the best elixirs from the Martial Alliance?”

“The Martial Alliance isn’t a pharmacy. I doubt it.”

I said to the Wi Clan children,

“The sword itself is already an ultimate form of martial arts. You should’ve attacked me with your sword before I used that technique. Draw quicker than my chi and cut my hand off. Each martial art has its quirks, but in the end, it’s about skill. Even you, Miss Wi—you just stared blankly while I performed the Thunder Dragon Ascension, didn’t you?”

“Yes.”

“If you’re fighting an Outer Demon, you don’t need to be polite.”

“Are you an Outer Demon, Lord?”

“Not exactly.”

That’s a new one. Truth is, I’m nothing.

“Miss Wi, gentlemen—don’t regret choosing the sword. It’s not for nothing they call it the King of Close Combat.”

Wi Tae-san said,

“They say the King of Close Combat is the spear.”

I shook my head.

“That’s only in the military. Jianghu is different. When soldiers fight in formation, sure, spears are more effective. But we’re martial artists. Unless someone has a torso that no sword can cut and a spear tip forged from ten-thousand-year-old steel... that’s another matter. But how many such weapons exist?”

Wi Jung-cheon added,

“I heard the spear used by Senior Divine Halberd is incredibly durable.”

“I see. But at that level, I think he could fight with a pair of chopsticks.”

“Well, that’s true.”

Is the Wi Clan going through an identity crisis? Really, it’s the master or the clan head’s job to address this. But somehow, I’m the one doing it, so I feel a bit awkward.

“So, where is your clan head?”

Wi Mu-gyeol replied,

“He’s visiting the Martial Alliance with other clan leaders. I’m not sure if he’s arrived yet.”

“Why?”

“It’s a sensitive matter, but I’ll tell you. There’s talk among the southern clans of forming a separate alliance, so he went to discuss it with the Alliance Leader.”

“Ah.”

I nodded.

So these bastards went to harass Alliance Leader Im. If the clans break away to form a separate power bloc, it weakens the meaning of the Martial Alliance. Of course he’ll reject it.

‘So that was it.’

When unity weakens, even Lord Im will have a hard time defending the clans. Maybe that’s why the enemy picked them off one by one. He might’ve clashed with the Scholar Faction while trying to deal with them alone. That’s why he chose seclusion and prepared to consume the Heavenly Pearl.

I asked the eldest son,

“Is there any other reason your belief in the sword is shaken?”

The Wi brothers looked at each other. Then Wi Mu-gyeol said,

“Probably because we’re being outclassed by the Baekri, Seomun, and Nangong clans.”

I nodded.

“I see. Don’t accept any Biwu matches for a while.”

Wi So-seon asked,

“Even if they challenge us?”

“Refuse. Giving up fame to build skill is a good strategy. If some unknown master shows up challenging you to a duel, say no. If they won’t leave, have the entire Wi Clan come out to face them. Guards, disciples, young lords, Miss Wi, even the clan head. Drive the intruder out. Maybe for ten years?”

Was that too random a suggestion? Everyone just stared at me. Guess they didn’t think it was a normal solution.

Wi So-seon asked me,

“Is it really necessary to go that far?”

I looked at her.

“Is there any reason not to? Miss Wi, do you think there are no stronger dark-path experts or Outer Demons than me?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Didn’t you all train in martial arts to protect your clan? If you duel today out of pride and lose, you gain nothing. We’ll just finish our meal and leave with some small talk.”

Wi Mu-gyeol nodded.

“Lord of the Sect, we’ll do that.”

“As you know, even Alliance Leader Im doesn’t accept random challenges. His role is to lead and protect the Alliance. If masters came every day to challenge him, could he run the Alliance?”

Wi So-seon nodded.

“Of course not.”

“That’s why it's forbidden. No challenges. Maybe once when retiring or picking the next leader, he might demonstrate his strength. Even someone like Lord Im takes care of himself. So should the Wi Clan.”

Of course, I’m saying this because I know skirmishes will soon erupt across Jianghu.

Wi Tae-san asked,

“Is there a particular reason you’re warning us like this?”

Turns out Wi Tae-san was the most perceptive. I nodded.

“If the Demonic Cult rises and attacks the Martial Alliance, what will you do?”

“We’ll rush to help.”

“What if they split their forces and attack the Baekri Clan and your Wi Clan?”

The Wi brothers looked at each other again.

Wi Jung-cheon replied,

“We’d have to hold out together as best we can.”

“...But what if that’s just a feint, and in truth, the Cult Leader and his elite strike the Martial Alliance directly? Would you keep some troops at home and send others to the Alliance? Or ignore the Alliance’s crisis?”

After thinking, Wi Mu-gyeol answered.

“It’s better to secure our home first, then join the Martial Alliance.”

“Why?”

“If the Alliance falls to the Demonic Cult, our clans fall too.”

Indeed, the eldest son was worthy of the title.

“Exactly. And yet your clan heads went to Alliance Leader Im asking to form a separate alliance. I imagine he sighed. That’s not what he wanted to talk about.”

At last, Wi Mu-gyeol’s expression changed.

I said to him,

“Young Master, forming a new alliance may bring fame, power, and profit through trade unions—but it’s not easy. One day, it could all burn to the ground, like my inn did.”

I lifted my teacup.

“And when that happens, even if you down ten cups of plum tea a day, your chest will still feel tight.”

Wi Mu-gyeol asked me,

“If the Demonic Cult appears, what will you do?”

“I’m not formally part of the Alliance. I’ll /N_o_v_e_l_i_g_h_t/ move like an independent unit. If the Cult harasses the Alliance, I’ll harass the Cult.”

Wi So-seon asked,

“So you’ll hit and run?”

“Exactly. Gotta be good at running.”

“You’re not afraid of the Cult?”

“I am. I’ve already killed many cultists. Yet they keep me alive. That unsettles me. I feel like I’m being watched. Maybe they know how to absorb my internal energy through dark arts. And I have a yin-yang body, so the Cult Leader might just see me as a side dish for dinner. Hahaha...”

I laughed—and realized I was the only one laughing.

“......”

I wiped the smile from my face and poured another cup of plum tea. For the first time in a while, the Cult Leader’s face vividly came to mind.

‘That son of a bitch...’