Surviving the Apocalypse: All I Want Is to Find a Husband-Chapter 196: The Pie Disaster

Just a while ago, Medeia had thought, How hard could baking a pie be?

All she had to do was throw in some flour, butter, salt, sugar, water, and whatever else was needed, mix it all together with her magical mixer, and—BAM! A perfect pie, ready to go.

At least, that what’s she thought. Reality, however, had other plans.

"Uh ... are you sure it’s supposed to look like this?" Medeia asked, staring at the mess in front of her.

The dough was way too runny, almost like pancake batter, and so ridiculously sticky that every time she tried to roll it out, it clung to the rolling pin like an obsessive ex.

[Host, which part of the instructions did you not understand?!]

[The system gave you a detailed recipe, step-by-step instructions, and even a video tutorial, so how in the world does your pie look one hundred percent different from the tutorial?!]

If the system could say harsh words, it would have said hundreds of harsh words to her.

Medeia groaned, throwing the rolling pin onto the table with a loud thunk! "That’s because you’re too noisy! You keep saying ’don’t add this, hurry up and add that’, how am I supposed to focus when you’re nagging in my mind?!"

And to make things worse, her stomach ache still wasn’t going away. If she stood for much longer, she was pretty sure she’d throw up right into the sticky disaster of a dough.

[That’s because you almost poured an entire sack of salt into the dough!]

[Do you want Lucian to get cancer again?!]

"Hey! That’s way too far!" Medeia shot back. "Look, let’s just start over. I can do it again."

[You only have two hours left, Host. Do you really think you can pull this off in time?]

Medeia let out a sharp sigh, clicking her tongue in frustration. She had already wasted an entire hour mixing ingredients, desperately trying to get the dough to the perfect consistency.

And yet, it still turned out horrible.

"Ugh, whatever." She groaned, throwing her hands up. "I give up. I don’t want to do this anymore."

[Host, are you seriously giving up over a pie?!]

[It’s just baking a pie! How can you abandon your entire quest because of this?!]

[Not only will you lose the chance to double your points, but you’ll also be penalized 10,000 C-Points if you fail your romance quest!]

[That’s the equivalent of 500 curse words! 500 curse words, Host!]

Medeia blinked. Was she really that pathetic that the system had to dangle curse words as motivation?

She crossed her arms, tapping her fingers against her elbow. "Fine," she muttered begrudgingly. "Let’s do it again."

[However, due to your utter failure, if you want to start over, you’ll need to repurchase the ingredients, Host.]

[The system, being ever so generous, will grant you a discount. You only need to pay 2,500 gold coins.]

Medeia clicked her tongue again. The system was really out here scamming her while acting like it was doing her a favor.

But it wasn’t like she had another choice. The dough was a complete disaster, and most of the ingredients were either used up or wasted—some because she had poured way too much, others because they had somehow ended up all over the floor.

"Just buy it." She waved her hand dismissively, already regretting this entire decision.

[2,500 gold coins have been deducted from Host’s balance.]

[Purchase complete! Thank you for your patronage, Host!]

Medeia sighed. If she failed again, all the gold coins she had spent would go completely to waste.

Just as she opened the bag of flour, the bedroom door suddenly swung open.

Lucian’s eyes widened as he took in the absolute disaster before him. His immaculate bedroom was now covered in flour on the furniture, the floor, even the bed ... He didn’t even want to think about that.

For a long moment, he just stared. Processing.

"... Medeia," he said slowly, his voice laced with disbelief, but still trying to sound as gentle as possible, "what. The hell. Are you doing?"

"Lucian?! What are you doing here?!" Medeia flinched, startled. She hastily tried to hide the ingredients from his sight but nearly knocked over the premium flour in the process.

Luckily, Lucian reacted in time, using his ability to stop the bag from tipping over. With a sigh, he set it down safely before pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I think I should be the one asking questions," he muttered. "What in the world made you think baking in the bedroom was a good idea?"

Medeia looked him straight in the eye, absolutely shameless. "The kitchen is too far."

Lucian’s expression twitched. He was clearly this close to losing it.

Sensing imminent danger, Medeia immediately switched tactics. She let out a soft, pitiful sigh, clutching her stomach as if she were the most fragile creature in existence.

"My stomach still hurts," she murmured, her voice delicate and weak. "But the system keeps pushing me to finish my quest right away." She let her tone drop into something pitiful, her big eyes glimmering. "If I can complete it in under three hours, I’ll get double points ... but if I fail, the system will reduce 10,000 points from me."

Her round eyes blinked up at him as she mumbled, "Lucian, I don’t have a choice ... Besides, you can clean up this mess later, right?"

Lucian took a deep breath and slowly exhaled before nodding. "Right. Of course I’ll clean up your mess," he said.

Rolling up his sleeves to his elbows, he took a step closer, eyes narrowing. "Now, do you actually want my help, or is the system forbidding me from saving you from whatever catastrophe you’re about to cause next?"

Medeia pouted slightly at Lucian’s blatant insult to her incredible baking skills, but she chose to stay silent.

[From a quick poll, the watchers have decided that Lucian should help you, Host.]

When the hell did they do a quick poll?! Now she felt like everyone was insulting her incredible baking skills!

Medeia averted her gaze. "The system says it’s fine ... but this was supposed to be a surprise. If you help me ... it won’t be a surprise anymore."

Lucian chuckled softly. "It stopped being a surprise the moment you decided to bake in our bedroom."

Medeia huffed. "I thought you’d be gone longer. I mean ... isn’t it hard to, you know, sever all the soldiers’ heads?"

"Not at all," Lucian answered casually. "I just had to rip them off all at once."

Medeia fell silent for a moment, staring at him. Yeah. Sometimes, Lucian was just a little bit... unhinged.

"And what about the young soldiers?" she asked, clearing her throat. "Shouldn’t you have stayed to ... comfort them? You know, since they were probably hysterical?"

"I can take care of that later. I already asked Naomi to put them to sleep with your flute," Lucian said as he wiped the flour off the table. "And Dr. Joy confirmed that they don’t have chips implanted in their heads, so they’ll be fine."

He turned to her then, his gaze soft with concern. "Actually, I’m more worried about you. Is your stomach really still hurting that much?"

Now, Medeia was finally convinced that he had completely forgotten about the disaster she had made of their bedroom.

Medeia didn’t waste the opportunity. She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder with all the dramatics of a dying heroine. "It hurts so much, honey. I thought I was going to die."

She let out a long, suffering sigh. "And to make it even worse, I failed to make the pie after spending an entire hour trying! Why is baking a pie so hard?!"

Lucian pressed his lips together, his shoulders subtly shaking. He was definitely holding back laughter. His gaze flickered to the crime scene on the table—what was supposed to be pie dough but instead looked like a slime.

"My love," he said gently, "you added way too much water. Baking a pie isn’t actually that hard. The recipe is simple. Didn’t the system give you clear instructions?"

Medeia clenched her fists for a moment before stubbornly replying, "No." Then, after a dramatic pause, she added, "The system gave me very unclear instructions. That’s why ... can you help me? I need to finish baking it in under two hours."

[Host, lying is a serious offense!]

[The system provided you with very detailed instructions for baking a pie!]

[Reducing 1,000 C-Points from your balance!]

Medeia internally screamed. That’s equal to 50 curse words!

’Hey, didn’t you want me to show some lovey-dovey moments for your watchers?’

’If I tell him the truth, he’ll probably think I’m incompetent instead of helping me!’

The system went silent for a moment before reluctantly chiming in.

[The system has canceled your penalty because your reasoning is valid.]

Medeia cackled in her heart. The system was still so easy to fool.

"I used to help my mom bake blueberry pie, but that was a long time ago, so I might not be able to recreate it perfectly," Lucian said with a small smile. "But I’ll do my best to help you."

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