Second Try Idol-Chapter 427: Goodbye and Promise (2)

Why were we doomed to live in a world without Suh Hyun-Woo? After all our sacrifices and struggles, what would we have gained if we returned from this world?

Nothing. It was not enough just knowing that Suh Hyun-Woo was alive somewhere. He could interact with us and share the career he longed for here, but in our original world, he was still dead. How could we possibly find peace with that? Returning meant walking back into a living hell.

Kang Joo-Han sighed, and his voice became heavy with weariness. “Yoo-Joon.”

Goh Yoo-Joon wasn’t wrong. It was just a difference in perspective. In the original world, Suh Hyun-Woo was no longer alive. They would forever mourn him, and the only slight consolation would be a reduced burden of guilt for having robbed him of a happier life.

But was that sacrifice truly worth it? It seemed unbearably cruel to demand Goh Yoo-Joon endure such excruciating separations solely for the sake of Suh Hyun-Woo’s happiness.

“If we stay, we can go back to performing, and Hyun-Woo will be with us.”

They had only just started to connect with Suh Hyun-Woo, who was finally ready to listen to them. To tear that newfound connection apart so soon seemed immensely brutal.

“Why should we leave? Why can't we just stay here comfortably with Hyun-Woo?”

It was like returning to a slightly changed past. Staying didn’t mean losing anything.

Goh Yoo-Joon's voice trembled slightly, betraying his emotional turmoil. As he spoke, Kang Joo-Han’s hands rested heavily on his shoulder. “We still need to go. I can’t just leave you here.”

Hearing this, Goh Yoo-Joon's eyes flashed briefly with resolve before settling into a determined look.

“We need to go.”

“If you’re going, go by yourself. I want to stay.”

“No, you’re coming with me.”

Goh Yoo-Joon was overwhelmed by frustration and feelings, so he grimaced and shrugged off Kang Joo-Han’s hands. But Joo-Han’s gaze remained firm and unwavering. “Let’s not make selfish choices. Remember, we agreed to make decisions for Hyun-Woo’s sake, whatever the sacrifice.”

‘What if we stay here?’

It would mean that Hyun-Woo would once again lose a companion, a friend with whom he had shared his dreams and struggles. The magnitude of Chronos’ Goh Yoo-Joon’s presence to Hyun-Woo was irreplaceable, and a selfish choice on their part would mean ripping that away from him.

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The guilt that would envelop Suh Hyun-Woo could be immense, possibly snatching away the smile they had just begun to see more frequently.

“Do you really want to stay here and watch Hyun-Woo revert to his former self, isolated and withdrawn?”

“That’s not what I want, but you know why I’m reluctant to leave.”

Kang Joo-Han understood but still disagreed. “I get where you’re coming from, but I don’t know if that’s the best option we have.” He shook his head, and his hand slowly slid off Goh Yoo-Joon’s shoulder. “I can’t endorse the choice you want to make because it might not lead to Hyun-Woo’s happiness. Yoo-Joon, it’s going to be hard, but—”

“What are you guys talking about?”

Their conversation was abruptly interrupted. The door swung open, causing both of them to whirl around in surprise.

“Why, what’s all this about? You both look so shocked,” Suh Hyun-Woo remarked, eyes wide as he noticed their flustered expressions.

Until just a moment ago, the two had been grimly tearful. They now awkwardly lifted the corners of their mouths in a forced smile.

“Hey. Why are you here?"

“Huh?"

Suh Hyun-Woo was at a loss for words again, not expecting to hear that question from them. Of course, he hadn’t assumed he’d be welcomed no matter what.

Nevertheless, Suh Hyun-Woo naturally squeezed in between the two. “Nothing much. I just dropped by. Do you know you both look really tense? Were you in the middle of a serious conversation?"

***

Deciding this might be my last chance, I barged into the studio only to find Kang Joo-Han and Goh Yoo-Joon looking unusually flustered. It seemed like they'd been deep in a serious conversation, and though the dim light of the studio might have deceived me, Goh Yoo-Joon’s eyes appeared suspiciously moist.

Had I walked in at the wrong time? My sudden entrance seemed to have caught them off guard, making me feel awkward. I pointed toward the door and said half-jokingly, “Should I leave?"

They quickly waved their hands and pressed down on my shoulders. “Ah! No, no, stay here!"

Their overly panicked reaction seemed unnatural. It was just my guess, but they were probably discussing returning to the original world or talking about Lee Jin-Sung, who had already gone back.

“Phew, it’s hot." Joo-Han fanned himself before finally turning on the light in the previously dim studio. “So, do you have anything you want to talk about?"

“Uh, well, it's not that I don’t have anything to say..." I stammered, finding talking difficult.

“Why? What’s up? Haha.”

“Umm...”

I just needed to speak, but the words wouldn't come out easily. Maybe it was because the two men in front of me were members of Elated, with whom I've had quite a turbulent history. Even though they were familiar faces, I found it strangely hard to speak.

However, both of them looked at me with such intense curiosity, as if saying a bit of hesitation was perfectly fine. They had always waited for me to speak. I hadn’t realized until now just how patient they had been with me.

Feeling overwhelmed, I muttered, “This is too much pressure. Back off a little, would you?"

I wanted to open up over a drink if possible, but tomorrow was the concert rehearsal.

“I’ve got stuff to talk about for tomorrow's concert rehearsal." Truth be told, Tae-Seong had already briefed me on most of it, so there wasn’t much to discuss. I hadn't come here to say anything specific because I just wanted to spend time with them, sensing our time together might be running short.

But did it have to be this hard to talk? Was there really a reason for me to be intimidated by them? It was possibly our last chance to talk things over. If ever there was a time to be frank, it was now. We didn't have the luxury to be hesitant.

“I came here to talk in full honesty and openness," I blurted out.

“...Hmm?" Both looked bewildered by my sudden declaration.

“There’s a lot of things we haven’t talked about yet, right?" I looked directly at Goh Yoo-Joon. "You used to come by often, asking to talk."

“Yeah, I did,” he admitted.

“Now that there's not much time left, let’s lay it all out. I won't dodge you anymore."

But why was Goh Yoo-Joon glancing at Joo-Han as if worried about being scolded? Had I really chosen such a bad time to come?

Before the situation could turn more awkward, Joo-Han broke the ice. “Hyun-Woo, do you like being with the Chronos members here?"

“...Wow.”

That was a heavy topic to start with. Caught off guard, my initial impulse to respond was stifled by the gravity of the question.

“Is it hard to answer?"

“...”

Of course it was. How could I straightforwardly address such a question with them right in front of me?

I stopped myself from answering instinctively, clenched my teeth, and shook my head. “No."

After all, these members, whom I might never see again, had chosen and sacrificed something to give us this opportunity to talk once more. For their sake, and not least for mine, I shouldn’t avoid this conversation. We deserved this much.

“Honestly, it has been easier with them," I confessed.

“...Really?" Joo-Han probed.

“Because I thought of Chronos as just the members of Elated.”

Until recently, I just thought that I had just returned to the past, shrugging it off as some supernatural anomaly that allowed me to come back to life. The members from the past didn’t know my traumas, so interacting with them without any reservations felt comforting.

“Thanks for saving me. It allowed me not only to debut, but also..." I faced them, wary that my words might hurt them and that the old wounds might show on their faces. “...Also, I can now talk heart-to-heart with you and Jin-Sung."

The burdens and misunderstandings, the pain and affection we had... All of them could be resolved here, not to mention the bitterness of a life cut short.

I took a deep breath. “I will speak honestly."

It was a moment that desperately called for a drink. It took me a long time to say this. Because I hesitated, Joo-Han and Goh Yoo-Joon became confused.

"...Hey, hey! What are you doing?"

“Why, Hyun-Woo! What is it?"

I said, “I’m sorry."

“For what..."

“For avoiding all of you. For making you feel guilty when it wasn’t your fault."

“Hey, why would you think..."

“I’m sorry. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see you."

In truth, they had been precious to me. Although I had built walls between us, ultimately turning them into distant figures, they were too precious, and there was a bond between us I could never run away from. They were truly Elated.

But despite that, the reason I avoided them was simple.

“I just didn’t want to show you my marred face.”

The more Elated shone brightly, the more miserable I became. Elated grew and prospered, while I remained stagnant.

While they built happy memories with the love of their fans, I was busy avoiding people’s eyes and hiding my disfigured face.

We had started together, but... There was a time when I shone just as brightly. My damaged face was too much for my pride to bear, and that was why I avoided them. It wasn't their fault.

“I thought I’d rather die than show you my injured face. I hated even the thought of it.”

I did it to protect my fragile pride.