Reborn: The Return of the Villainous Mr. Liu-Chapter 1042: What truly is happy future?

Zhan Yahui…

Zhan Yahui…

Jin tried to make sense of the reality but only a pitch black darkness enveloped his gaze. Zhan Yahui was an existence he could never forget, yet he failed to understand how could that same evilness dwell within Ren Alix?

He stared at her with a clear gaze and felt it then. She was just like Zhan Yahui yet not like Zhan Yahui at the same time.

Alix smiled. "You want to ask how could a vile woman like me be back? Your brother deserved every right to get a second chance but not me. It's complicated, just like how it must have been for you to turn time back."

He said nothing.

"Nevertheless, I am here. I understand your feelings, that is why I want to assure you that I didn't return to ruin your family again. But an assurance from me…" she chuckled sardonically, "would hardly be of any use to you, isn't it?"

He said nothing.

A steep silence fell where nobody uttered a single word further. Alix wasn't sure what else she should say. She waited to see if Jin would respond but as she expected, his quietness was his answer in itself.

"I am not here to harm your family," she said again as if that would make any difference.

She looked into his vacant gaze. From the greatest joy of his life, she had made him fall into the deepest hell of misery. It pricked her chest. She had no intentions to hurt anybody anymore, yet somehow she had become the cause of Jin's pain again.

She wryly smiled to herself.

I guess that's how it always will be. I am not meant to give happiness to anybody…

She said in a low whisper, "I am sorry. If I had even remotely known that you…would start to feel something for me, I would have never shown my face to you."

Sensing that he had nothing to say - not at this moment when his hopes and love had shattered into a million pieces, she thought it was best for her to leave. She held no doubts that he would come again to confront her and punish her for her crimes.

It is to be expected. It's not enough no matter how many times I am made to pay for my sins, she thought expressionlessly.

I guess I shouldn't have promised Alix so soon…

The click of her heels tapped as she slowly walked past him. As the distance between them kept widening, she slightly tilted her head. Until an hour ago, Jin couldn't bear to leave her out of his sight, yet now his tall frame blocking her view was nowhere to be seen again.

She blinked twice and then smiled to herself.

That's how it should be-

She stopped but not on her own. A hand held her arm, bringing her steps to a halt. She took a deep breath.

I guess a little delay of my payback was a far-fetched notion…

Alix turned, her heart steeled to see the viciousness and hatred in his eyes. Contrary to her expectations, Jin held a strange gaze she couldn't decipher the meaning of.

"...I was told that the cost of turning back time will be my future."

She stared at him.

"It was the sacrifice of my happy future I made in exchange for those ten years. I accepted it. After what I did to hurt Shui, I admitted that I deserved it too."

Alix's eyes slightly widened. She knew that for something like turning back time, Jin must have paid a cost but it was now that she learned the true answer. A thought then occurred to her.

"That's some shitty game the Gods have played with you then."

What else could be a joke than to fall in love with your past life's enemy after already giving up on your childhood love?

A love failed twice…She bitterly thought.

"I-Is it really a game?" He asked, his gaze glassy. "Just now..I kept thinking and thinking and thinking if the Gods…do They really hate me so much that They want to see me suffer like this? I didn't wish for time to turn back because I selfishly wanted something for myself. I only w-wanted Bro to be happy…So why did the God of Fate write a destiny like this for me?"

Alix didn't answer, neither did she have one.

"Then I began to wonder…" he continued, his voice distant, "Was my understanding of my sacrifice flawed since the beginning?"

Her brows slightly knitted.

"Was the meaning of happy future in itself something different than I had imagined? I stubbornly thought that my happiness was in Shui and that I will never be able to move past my feelings for her, but…I fell in love with you. Now you tell me the truth of who you are and I am supposed to feel that yet again, I will never be able to move past your real identity, but…I still keep seeing Ren Alix in front of my eyes."

Jin slowly looked up at the sky, trying to search the shadow of that annoying God of Fate with quivering eyelashes.

His lips parted in a daze. "I get it now…He…wants to challenge my definition of happy future. What I always assumed my happiness would lie in might not necessarily be my reality. It was easy to ignore my mistakes and marry Shui, but what if that attachment would have only ended up in a tragedy because of my unresolved guilt?"

He gradually lowered his gaze, peering into her eyes - Alix's eyes.

"It is easy for me to consume myself in hatred and let go of you, but is it…what I should really do?"

He let out a small peal of wry chuckle. "You know it's like…a-at times Ailun doesn't really understand what he wants. He thinks he knows what he wants but it is not until Zhou Ai brings the right thing before him that he realizes that that was what he wanted all along. Parents understand what their children don't. Are the Gods and I like Zhou Ai and Ailun? Maybe They didn't steal my happiness but stole the illusion I clung to."

"Be-Because..." his voice cracked with a lump in his throat, "Right now as you stand before me, I am not able to give up on you at all."