Nexus Awakened (An Isekai LitRPG Gender Bender Story)-Chapter 960. Missing The Sweet Taste of Mortality

“Mathematical equations were the Starchild’s way of finding a method to bring peace to Lailah.”

Nav solemnly spoke, biting into a cookie.

It had been freshly baked by the Healers on the Floor of Amalgamation. They weren’t the stored batches that were tens of days old. The sweet treats were contained in a small plate beside a steaming cup of tea.

Their shapes and cuts were crude, like they were made by inexperienced hands.

They were tasteless.

Anna was staring at Nav from across a rectangular coffee table, expecting her eyes to bulge with delight. Nav was a connoisseur of sweets, to where she could accurately tell the exact measurements of the ingredients used by taste alone.

This batch followed a recipe Anna’s Bookkeepers had discovered during their free time. Since time moved differently in the Eternal Library due to a variety of reasons such as location or the influence of an Isolation Sphere, most Bookkeepers had ample time to pursue their own passions or assist members of the Nexus.

Ber and her ensemble of cooks were a large client of the Eternal Library.

While there were no limits to the number of dishes Elysia championed, Ber was curious about cuisine from other worlds.

That aside, Anna wore a disheartened look when she found that the effects of the Taste of Mortality had ran out for Nav.

“I’ll go call Kissaria now! Don’t you have a backup too? Or did you eat through all of it already? You need to space them out. Eating them all in a few days will start to me us think you have an addiction.”

Addiction. Is that how they see it?

Nav didn’t believe that to be the case. She vehemently denied it in her mind, but she remained still on the outside, as though Anna’s words were entirely disregarded.

“I can wait. Kissaria is not currently inside of the Nexus. Of the T-4 Artificers, she and Enoch are freely allowed to stay in the Nexus. It’d be beneficial if she could remain here. From what I hear, ImpulseWorks is experiencing issues with their Sites.”

Can craving the ability to understand emotion be called an addiction, when I have yet to understand them in the first place? I picture it like an ill-fated serf hacking away at a stone in hopes of striking gold. Whether I’m on the right track to understand these sensations or not will not be known until I strike gold.

In truth, Nav’s heart whirled. The gears that operated what was supposed to mimic a human heart churned with displeasure.

A part of her despised that yearing for a fundamental piece of existence was an addiction.

Although, Nav knew that Anna did not mean it like this. The cupcake only provided Nav the ability to taste. True emotion came when her emotions Heightened…

Still not enough to experience those bends…

Nav sipped from the tasteless cup of tea. It may as well have been filled with dirty water. She wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference.

Still, she savored it and wore a look that thanked Anna for always providing these for her.

“No different from giving cheese to a full rat.”

“Not really.” Anna assured her, leaning over the table to stretch as she beamed a smile at her. “You don’t make friends that way. Am I really the person to make every interaction a transaction? I just wanna take care of you too. I owe it you guys.”

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“Finding my one perfect book would be a start to repay your debt.”

“We’re still working on it. Besides, I feel like you’ve been getting liver each day. But today’s you feels out of the norm.”

“Today’s me, hm. Implying that the me yesterday isn’t the me from today? I fail to see the logic in that statement.”

“It means you’re constantly changing is all.” Anna giggled.

She reached out from across the table, wiggling in her chair. She wore a face that said: “Take my hand~”

Nav slowly slid hers onto the girl’s. At once, Anna cupped hers and softly said:

“It might not seem that way to you right now, but trust me, it does for the rest of us. It’s not so bad to ask others what they think of you. I think if I tried that then I wouldn’t have lost sight of what I needed to do to change myself...”

She trailed off, hugging the coat that Sinder had left behind for her.

“It does not change that I lack a real body.” Nav said impassively. “Although, being told that I am human does tend to give me some peace of mind. Touch is an important sense. Can you imagine an existence without touch?”

“Impossible. But honestly… if it meant that I could stay with any one person I loved, then I’d give it away.” Anna slipped back into her chair. “There’s a lot of components to it huh?”

“And I thought machines were complex.” Nav smiled. “Other than the cupcake born from the aspirations of my heart, I am indeed aware of the facets that are easing my transition to shed this steel shell. Frost, right now, has received an Ability that will allow her to grant non-Light entities Light.”

“Ooh! Wait, that’s incredibly useful! The Bookkeepers don’t have much Light themselves! Nor do the Puritas!”

Anna practically jumped from her seat but quickly nursed her foot when it banged against a stray book lying beneath the table.

Impuritas that became Puritas were granted a small spark of Light by the Arbiter. This process was not limited to those affected by her initial transformation. Instead, she could perform this transformation on demand, but it required an Impuritas to fulfil her own criteria to become elevated.

But that Light was so insignificant that at best, it was what allowed them to transform in the first place.

However, in Frost’s case, her sparks of Light carried significant power, enough to invoke Corruptions on entities that were previously immune to them. There were different kinds of Light as a result.

The Arbiter’s was what Anna called a diluted form of Light.

The biggest takeaway from this was that Anna and Nav wondered if Frost’s power could be extrapolated to permanently granting Light.

If that could be done…

“The Impuritas ended up following the wrong Star~ My Bookkeepers would be able to use the Library’s resources to help fight if they had their own Light.”

“That responsibility falls onto the shoulders of the Archetypes. And strangely myself.”

Nav sipped from her tea.

“That makes you just as special~”

“If you believe I am, then who am I to tell you otherwise? It does feel nice to be complemented, because there is truth to it.”

“Yup.”

Her conversation with Anna brought her much needed relief. As she nibbled on a cookie and took another sip of tea, she listened to the sounds that played behind Frost’s voice.

It was a buzz in the background. A static feedback that constantly played whenever she engaged with her telepathic abilities.

Her golden eyes fell into her reflection in the cup of tea as the sounds grew louder.

“Even in my mind there are murmurs of others. Thoughts I cannot fathom.”

Ripples formed on the surface of the milky tea.

It distorted her reflection.

The peaks intensified as she tuned into those sounds, as though taking a dive into the void.

Those sounds of static gradually became clearer.

Until Nav began to hear voices.

Laughter. Cheers. Sounds of happiness.

“Hundreds relay their experiences to me. They give me a picture of the world I cannot experience myself.”

But amongst those voices were screams of terror.

The scramble that persisted in the back of her mind were caused by the hundreds of people who had received the Blessing of the Amalgam. Every thought, every emotion, and every sensation was relayed back to her.

Yet even with all this data, she could not come to understand what it all meant.

Why it was so important.

But a part of me craves it.

“Nav. The Archetype of Ego is calling for you. It seems urgent.” Res suddenly appeared by her side, tapping her on the shoulder.

“This is the first time she’s calling me directly. Couldn’t she have asked me telepathically?”

“She sent me because you weren’t replying. It went to Frost, then straight to me. Everything alright? Anna?”

“Good as yesterday~!” Anna exclaimed. “Nav’s just missing her cupcakes.”

“I will stay off them until Kissaria’s next visit.” Nav said.

She then picked up a napkin and patted her face. Her face wasn’t dirty, but she had learned that it was good table manners.

However, much to her surprise, the napkin had something on it.

It was damp.

It came from her mouth.

Nav then realized something.

I was salivating…?