Mesugaki Tank Enters The Academy-Chapter 339: Academy End Party (2)

The last time I received some accessories from the Perverted Apostle, he also gave me a crystal orb to contact him whenever necessary.

He said I could reach out to him at any time, given the favor I had granted him, but I just let those words slide out of my head.

It’s hard enough keeping my sanity with the Lovesick Fox around; did he really expect me to handle the Perverted Apostle too?

So, I almost threw the crystal orb into the trash but decided at the last second to just shove it into my inventory instead.

Despite his questionable personality, his abilities were useful. I figured there might come a time when I’d need his help.

In hindsight, that decision was wise.

It didn’t even take a month before I found myself in need of him.

The plan is simple: enhance my charm to the maximum to mesmerize the crowd, finishing my speech before they snap out of it.

This ridiculous plan, born from the Lovesick Fox’s nonsense, would require the Perverted Apostle’s abilities to become a reality.

Think about it. Just appearing and leaving people in a daze isn’t exactly easy.

If everyone were like the Lovesick Fox or the Perverted Apostle, then maybe. But to truly overwhelm the senses of ordinary, sane people, I’d need to elevate my charm to its absolute peak.

And when it comes to maximizing charm, there’s no one better than the Perverted Apostle.

Regardless of his rotten personality, the guy has an artistic flair—so much so that he was chosen by the Apostle of Beauty and Art.

With his help, I could not only get a fabulous outfit but maybe even receive blessings from the Perverted Crow Goddess herself.

Plus, I have a few other things to ask him while I’m at it.

The moment I used the crystal orb to contact him, the Perverted Apostle’s face appeared, eyes alight with anticipation, and I was immediately filled with regret.

What the hell was he doing that he picked up my call in less than a second?

Don’t tell me he was waiting for my call all this time?

“Seeing your icy gaze makes my heart race, Lady Allen! Could you look at me with even sharper eyes?!”

...Maybe I should just pretend this was a mistake and end the call.

<Hold on, child! Just bear with it a little longer!>

I feel like my molars are about to shatter if I keep this up.

...Damn. If he weren’t such a one-of-a-kind asset, I’d drop him in an instant!

Clenching my fist and resisting the urge to hurl insults, I noticed the Perverted Apostle flash an awkward smile.

“Oh! My apologies! I got carried away. So, what can I help you with today?”

“Well, here’s the thing...”

“Listen carefully, you creepy Apostle. I’m granting you the privilege to style me.”

“...Could you elaborate?”

Without going into details, I simply explained that I’d be giving a speech at the academy’s term-end party and wanted to look my absolute best. The Apostle’s face lit up with pure joy.

“Thank you so much! I’ll come to see you tomorrow!”

...Huh?

The party isn’t for quite some time. Why come tomorrow?

There’s really no need for such urgency.

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You’re going to make it awkward if you start fussing over this too soon. Just show up a day or two before, and that’ll be—

“Apostle! What exactly do you mean by that?!”

As I blinked at the Apostle’s overexcitement, a loud voice erupted from behind him.

“Do you realize how much work has piled up while you’ve been away?!”

“Priest Kesh, this is more important than my own life.”

“Please! Apostle! Remember that you’re the only Apostle of the Church of Art! You’re not in a position to slack off like this!”

“Kesh, Kesh? Could you take a moment?”

“Just a moment? A moment after all the sleepless nights you’ve put me through because of you?”

“Calm down and look at this crystal orb for a second.”

“If this isn’t something important, I swear...”

As I faced the scowling woman on the other side, a pang of dread surged through me.

Um... I’m truly sorry. I didn’t mean to cause trouble. This pervert just latched onto me, so if you’re going to be mad, please aim that fury at him.

“...Is this young lady...?”

As I mentally rambled an apology, the woman’s expression shifted.

Gone was the anger, replaced with pure admiration as she looked at me. It was an expression that eerily reminded me of the Perverted Apostle.

“The Lady of House Allen. I’ve mentioned her often, haven’t I?”

“Yes, but... wow, I didn’t realize she’d look like this.”

“Uh... thank you?”

“Hmph. You should thank me. After all, I’m cleansing your eyes from all the nonsense you’ve probably had to look at in the mirror.”

“And her voice is just as beautiful!”

I’m starting to hate myself for ever thinking this woman was normal.

How could I forget that anyone under the Perverted Crow would be far from ordinary?

I let out an exaggerated sigh, but the two continued chatting, oblivious to my reaction.

“She’s entrusted me with her entire look.”

“...Apostle, I just had a flash of inspiration. I’ll go!”

“Priest Kesh, even you can’t be allowed to do that. This is a task entrusted to me by the Goddess.”

“Hah! If the Goddess herself saw my vision, she’d change her mind!”

From the sounds of it, their bickering could be heard throughout the Church of Art, drawing even more people to the scene.

“What’s going on this time? Oh! Is that...!”

“Please! Apostle! Just let me—”

After a few more people joined the fight over seeing my face, I silently turned off the crystal orb and tossed it in the trash.

‘I am never going anywhere near the Church of Art.’

<...Yes, child. I think that’s a wise decision.>

“Everyone’s made great progress, but in the end, no one can surpass me, the Apostle chosen by the Goddess.”

Seeing the Perverted Apostle’s smug face stirred countless words within me, but I held them back.

Saying anything would just make this pervert even happier, so why waste my breath?

“You said you’d already picked out a dress. Could you show me?”

“Here it is.”

“Here, disgusting pervert, take a look with your filthy eyes.”

I placed the dress Joy had chosen on the table, and the Apostle’s eyebrows raised slightly.

“The design is decent. I’ll need to adjust it to fit you perfectly, but it’ll work as is.”

“You’re wearing my accessories, so I’ll match the makeup accordingly.”

“Borrowing the Goddess’s powers, I’ll grant a few blessings as well. Given the immense divine power within you...”

“Oh, this isn’t enough! Just imagining it in my head doesn’t do it justice! My lady, may I have the honor of seeing you in the dress? Seeing you dressed up would surely inspire me further!”

As the Apostle’s desperate gaze met mine, a mischievous thought crossed my mind.

Given how badly he wants this, wouldn’t it be fair to charge him a fee for the privilege?

“Uh, Apostle...”

“Perverted Apostle, we haven’t discussed the important part yet.”

“The important part?”

“Yes, that is...”

“I’m giving you the chance to dress me with those disgusting hands of yours, to witness my beauty in person. Surely, you’re not expecting this to be free?”

“...Of course. My apologies, Lady Allen. I was being presumptuous.”

Asking what I desired, he said he’d do anything within his power. His sincerity nearly made me laugh.

I expected this, but seeing it in reality is still dizzying.

“It’s nothing too major...”

“The request is simple. I want you to make outfits for my friends.”

Two nights ago.

Half delirious over this speech issue, I’d given up on sleep and sat at my desk, trying to recall my past experiences in character customization.

I didn’t think it would be too hard.

I may not have the best fashion sense, but I remember all those customization fanatics arguing over designs in arenas.

Thinking back on those debates, I started sketching ideas for Joy and Feibi’s outfits but quickly ran into a wall.

<...Child, this isn’t a human, is it?>

‘...It is. Sort of.’

My hands simply couldn’t bring to life the amazing designs I had in my head.

What good is having a fantastic concept if I can’t get it down on paper?

After pulling an all-nighter and listening to Grandpa berate me for plotting revenge on my friends, I finally gave up on designing the outfits myself.

Instead, I jotted down the main features that would suit Joy and Feibi and decided to ask the Perverted Apostle for help.

Yes, he may be a depraved, disgusting pervert, but his aesthetic sense is incredible.

With my notes as a base, he should be able to come up with something that would satisfy them both.

Originally, I planned to compensate him for the work, but...

“It’s no trouble at all. If I get to style you, I’d be more than happy to do this.”

Thanks to this pervert’s extreme enthusiasm, I got it for free.

...This is a win for me, right?

I’m not losing out on anything, so why does seeing his cheerful smile make me feel uneasy?

“May I meet the friends I’ll be creating outfits for? I’d like to see them in person to assess the designs.”

“Of course, but...”

“Of course, but don’t spout anything revolting, alright? If you show even a hint of your perversions, I’ll bash your head in.”

“Haha, don’t worry. I’ve served as the Church’s Apostle for years. I know how to behave.”

Watching him smile politely, I almost snapped at him, asking why he couldn’t act this way with me, but I held my tongue, already guessing what his response would be.

Listening to this degenerate is only going to drain my sanity. Better to just ignore him.

“I’ll go get my friends...”

“Get ready to work those filthy hands.”

“Will you be showcasing the look in front of your friends?”

“Yes.”

“Yes. I can’t trust the opinion of a revolting pervert.”

Their reactions will give me an idea of whether this plan is feasible.

I just hope it works out.

Otherwise, all the time I’ve endured this pervert’s nonsense will be wasted.

“How sad. I’m sure there’s no one more objective than me when it comes to beauty.”

Ignoring the Apostle’s ramblings, I left the room, sighing as I held my forehead.

Ugh, I’m exhausted. So drained.

If dealing with one Perverted Apostle is this bad, what kind of hell must the Church of Art be, filled with people like him?

Never.

No matter what happens.

I am never setting foot in that place.

Getting surrounded by those devotees of the Perverted Crow Goddess would be the death of my sanity.