Living Only For Myself: Make Those Who Hate Me Regret It-Chapter 131: Hold My Hand, Otherwise I Can’t Bear to Go

Chapter 131: Chapter 131: Hold My Hand, Otherwise I Can’t Bear to Go

They both had top bunks, directly across from each other. The question caught Xu Su by surprise, but she immediately knew who would be calling her at this hour.

She scrambled up onto her bed, shucked off her jacket, and burrowed into her quilt before fishing her phone out from under the pillow.

She had three unread text messages and two missed calls.

She had barely picked up the phone when it started ringing again—a third call from Zhou Mochen.

Xu Su paused for a moment, then pressed the answer button.

The man’s magnetic voice came through the phone. "Susu, why didn’t you reply to my messages?"

He seemed a little surprised that she had actually picked up, and his question came out a beat too late.

Xu Su gripped her phone, her voice low. "I wasn’t in the dorm just now. Is something wrong? It’s almost lights out. If there’s nothing important, I’m going to hang up."

Zhou Mochen glanced at the time and readily agreed. "Alright, then let’s text."

Xu Su ended the call and opened the three messages Zhou Mochen had sent earlier.

The first one asked what time she was going home tomorrow, saying he was planning to pick her up.

Seeing that she hadn’t replied for a while, he had sent the next two to coax a response out of her.

Just then, a new message from Zhou Mochen came in, right after she hung up.

[What time are you heading home tomorrow? I’ll come get you.]

Xu Su stared at it quietly for a moment, then slowly typed out a reply with both hands: [I’ll get home by myself.]

Zhou Mochen’s reply came back quickly: [I want to see you. You only have a five-day break. I want to see you, Xu Su.]

Before Xu Su could figure out how to respond, another one arrived: [Be good. Go home tomorrow morning and let me drive you. I’m heading back to Beijing in the afternoon.]

’He’s going back to Beijing?’

Xu Su realized he was going back to Beijing to spend the New Year with his parents.

A sense of relief washed over her; it seemed her winter break might finally have a bit of freedom after all.

With her thumb, she tapped out a reply: [Okay.]

~~

Early on the morning of the 29th day of the last lunar month, Xu Su washed up, bought two tea eggs and a cup of soy milk from the cafeteria, and walked off campus.

Zhou Mochen’s car was parked in the usual spot. She finished the last of her soy milk before getting in.

Sitting in this car again after three months, Xu Su felt a complex mix of emotions.

Zhou Mochen, on the other hand, seemed to be in a great mood. He reached over, trying to take her hand.

Xu Su pulled her hand away, her expression turning sour as she warned, "Zhou Mochen, you really need to stop being so handsy."

Zhou Mochen’s hand froze mid-air. He slowly pulled it back, then chuckled. "Have you really come to hate me? Are you still angry about me threatening you last time?"

Xu Su shot back sarcastically, "So you do know that threatening people makes them hate you."

’Hate...’

Zhou Mochen fell silent. He turned the steering wheel and started driving in the opposite direction of the Xu Family’s home.

Watching the direction they were heading, Xu Su frowned. "Where are you going?"

"Taking you for a drive. It’s not often I get to see you. Let’s have a proper chat."

’Another one of his unilateral decisions. Who would want to have a ’proper chat’ with him?’

Xu Su was thoroughly annoyed and had no desire to be alone with him.

The car got onto an overpass and drove along its slow, looping ramps. Outside the window were the changes Chang Province had undergone in recent years, and Xu Su found herself getting lost in the view.

She only snapped back to reality when Zhou Mochen took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, causing her to whip her head around.

Zhou Mochen glanced over at her as he drove, his eyes filled with amusement. "My flight is this afternoon. Just let me hold your hand for a bit, or I won’t be able to bear leaving."

’Still as domineering and autocratic as ever.’

The car stopped at Chang Province’s Lakefront Park. The area was far from First High School, and this was the first time Xu Su had been here in the year since her rebirth.

Zhou Mochen opened the passenger-side door and took her hand. "Come on, let’s go for a walk."

In the early morning, the park was full of elderly men and women practicing Tai Chi, with the occasional young person out for a morning run. Last night’s frost had yet to melt, and the cold wind stung her face as it blew past.

Zhou Mochen held Xu Su’s hand tightly. Every time a cold gust of wind hit, she couldn’t help but shrink her shoulders.

Zhou Mochen stopped, let go of her hand, and unwound his own scarf, wrapping it around her neck in a way that brooked no refusal.

"Susu, next time you go out, remember to bring a scarf and gloves."

He looked at the girl’s slightly reddened ears and, after using the scarf to cover them as well, added, "And a hat."

The scarf was still warm. Xu Su’s entire face, ears and all, was bundled inside it. It was saturated with Zhou Mochen’s pine-like scent, which filled her nostrils with every breath she took.

Less than two seconds later, Xu Su pulled her face free and reached up to unwind the scarf.

Zhou Mochen frowned, stopping her. "Aren’t you cold? Don’t be difficult with me right now."

Xu Su’s face flushed red. "Stop trying to find ways to take advantage of me, Zhou Mochen! I don’t want to smell your scent. If you have something to say, say it quickly."

Her words were incredibly blunt. When Zhou Mochen had wrapped the scarf around her, he genuinely hadn’t thought of it that way. Her sudden accusation left him stunned for a moment.

Then, he let out a soft laugh. "I’m perfectly clean, you know. Does it not smell good?"

’Damn pervert...’

In the end, Xu Su kept the scarf on. The two of them walked to the center of the lake in Lakefront Park. The surface of the water had frozen into a thin layer of ice, giving it a unique kind of beauty. 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒆𝙬𝒆𝒃𝓷𝒐𝓿𝙚𝙡.𝒄𝓸𝒎

The sun slowly peeked out, its rays feeling pleasantly warm on Xu Su’s face.

She found a clean spot to sit down, and Zhou Mochen immediately sat down beside her.

This time, he finally didn’t try to hold her hand. Instead, he began to speak in earnest.

Zhou Mochen asked, "Xu Su, you’ll be eighteen after the New Year. You’re not a kid anymore. How about we have a serious talk about us today?"

Xu Su was rendered speechless. ’What does he mean, ’us’? As far as I’m concerned, there is no ’us’ with him.’

’But since we’re already here, and he’s willing to talk calmly, I might as well listen. I have no objection.’

Seeing that Xu Su didn’t object, Zhou Mochen continued, "You know that I like you, right? Nod or shake your head."

Xu Su hesitated, then slowly, reluctantly, nodded.

A smile touched Zhou Mochen’s lips. "Let me lay out the situation for you."

He turned his head and said seriously, "Xu Su, I like you. And don’t laugh, but in my entire life, you’re the only girl I’ve ever liked—the kind I’d give my entire heart to. The long time you spent ignoring me recently taught me the true meaning of ’suffering from the pangs of lovesickness.’ Do you understand what I mean?"

His words were so cheesy they made Xu Su physically cringe. She couldn’t help but rub her arms through her clothes as she shook her head. "What do you mean?"

Zhou Mochen frowned. "If you’re cold, we can talk somewhere else."

"I’m not cold. Your words are just giving me goosebumps." Xu Su’s tone was full of disdain. "Zhou Mochen, you’re being way too cheesy."

Zhou Mochen froze. He pressed his temples as a familiar ache started in his chest. Here he was, baring his sincere, heartfelt feelings, and all she felt were goosebumps...

He paused for a long while before speaking again, his voice carefully controlled and calm. "It means that after a seventy-six-day cooling-off period, I’ve become completely certain that I can’t be without you. Xu Su, whether you believe it or not, I can’t live without you."