ISEKAI? More like I See Crap!-Chapter 207: A Day at the Orphanage ( )

Braham slammed his palm on the counter, his voice echoing through the guild like a thunderclap.

"So where is he!? Did he take the rank-up test yet!? Who’s testing him? Is it you, Gikan!?"

Gikan sighed.

Again.

"No, Guild Master Braham. That human... refused it."

There was a beat of stunned silence.

Then—

"HAH!!?"

Braham roared so loud that a few rookie adventurers near the window dropped their drinks.

He blinked twice.

"Refused!? Who the hell REFUSES a rank-up test!?"

Gikan didn’t even look up from his clipboard.

"I had the same reaction as you. He just... said no."

"No!?"

Braham looked personally offended.

"What did he say exactly?"

Gikan raised his hand, mimicking Hazuki’s bored tone.

"’That’s it? Sounds like a pain in the ass. Not interested.’"

Then he gestured flatly.

"’Also, I have Ellyn. I don’t need more girls.’"

Braham’s mouth opened. Closed. Opened again.

He stared.

"He refused power, status... and women?"

Gikan nodded.

"Correct."

The guild hall fell into a strange silence.

Then Braham tilted his head back and laughed.

A big, wild, unfiltered laugh.

"BAHAHAHAHA!! I like this guy even more now!!"

"Alright then! Where is he going!?"

Braham’s eyes gleamed with excitement.

Gikan rubbed his temples.

"Who knows..."

He exhaled sharply.

"I already have a headache just from you."

But it was too late.

Braham cracked his neck and turned toward the guild’s main doors.

"Fine! I’ll test him personally!"

"Hey! Don’t you—"

Gikan started, stepping forward, but Braham had already burst into motion.

"OI!! You’re going to make a mess again!!"

"THAT’S THE FUN PART!!" Braham cackled as he ran toward the door like a boulder with legs.

Gikan threw up his hands.

"STOP HIM!!"

Every adventurer in the hall went dead silent.

Eyes wide.

One brave rookie near the wall whispered, "S-Stop... Guild Master Braham...?"

Another replied with a pale face, "That’s... suicide."

"You stop him."

"No, you stop him."

"Let’s all agree to pretend we didn’t see anything."

The door slammed open.

Braham vanished outside, laughing like a madman.

Gikan just stared blankly at the now-swinging door.

"Ugh! YOU!"

Gikan snapped, pointing at the head receptionist.

She blinked mid-sip of her calming tea.

"Y-Yes, Deputy Guild Master?"

"You manage things here! I’m going after that battle freak!"

"Understood, sir!"

He turned to the nearest two guild staff members.

"You and you! Follow me! We’re stopping him together!"

One whispered, "Stop... the Guild Master...?"

The other immediately turned and bolted out the side door.

"EHHH!!! NO THANKS!!" the second one shouted over his shoulder.

"WE’RE BUSY!! REALLY BUSY!!"

The rest of the staff quickly found reasons to dive behind desks, restock the back room, or disappear entirely.

Gikan gritted his teeth.

"Damn it! Cowards!"

He stormed out after Braham alone, mumbling under his breath.

Meanwhile...

Ridan floated lazily in circles above Hazuki’s head, his misty form twisting like a gleeful child.

"Yummy yum yum...~" he sang.

"Meat secured... mission complete."

Hazuki hoisted a large leather bag, the straps bulging slightly from the drake meat packed inside—rich, marbled, thick cuts that could feed a noble banquet for a week.

He wore the biggest grin imaginable.

"Already got three bottles of liquor, too." he said proudly, patting his shoulder bag.

"Time for the perfect meal."

"Where we grilling it?" Ridan asked, already drooling like a ghost who forgot he was dead.

Hazuki pointed with a thumb over his shoulder.

"Back of the orphanage. There’s a small stream there. Quiet, peaceful, clean water."

He smirked.

"Perfect spot for grilling."

"Heheh~ let’s goooooo!!" Ridan spun like a misty tornado in delight.

As they walked, the townspeople watched the human with wide eyes—some still whispering, others just stepping aside.

Hazuki didn’t care.

"But this meat is heavy!" Hazuki grunted, adjusting the weight of the bag on his back.

"Of course it is!" Ridan did a little flip mid-air, eyes gleaming with ghostly hunger. frёewebηovel.cѳm

"It’s drake meat, baby!!"

Hazuki blinked.

"Is it really that good?"

"Of course, man!" Ridan nodded confidently.

"Imagine... premium wagyu beef back in your world—but juicier, richer, infused with natural mana! Yummy~"

Hazuki’s eyes widened.

"For real!?"

"If you had to buy this stuff? A tiny slice would cost a lot of coins!" Ridan smirked.

"And you got a whole bag!"

Hazuki stared down at the hefty leather sack, a rare look of awe spreading on his face.

"Wow..."

Then he paused.

"...Maybe we share some with the kids."

Ridan floated up beside him, expression softening for just a second.

"Heh~ I don’t mind." he said, spinning once.

"As long as you grill it, I touch it, and we eat it... I’m happy. Ehehehe~"

Hazuki raised an eyebrow.

"You still can’t eat properly, huh?"

Ridan shrugged mid-air.

"Who knows? Maybe once you level up more... or if I unlock more of my sealed abilities."

"Oho~? You have unlocked abilities too?" Hazuki smirked, nudging him with a shoulder.

Ridan grinned.

"Ancient Spirit, remember?"

"What kind of ability?" Hazuki asked, glancing at him.

Ridan puffed out proudly, floating just a little higher.

"Spirit Possession, like before!!"

He spun in place.

"I can enter your body and let you use my ancient magic. Big flashy stuff. AOE spells. The works."

He placed one misty hand on his chest.

"Thanks to me, the great Ridan-sama!"

Hazuki blinked.

"Oh."

"...That’s it? ’Oh’?" Ridan deflated slightly.

Then he smirked again.

"Heheheh~ how about I possess you... while you’re eating?"

Hazuki narrowed his eyes.

"What?"

"Imagine—you’re mid-bite, steak in your mouth—suddenly POOF, I take over, and I get to taste it!"

He twirled midair, wicked glee on his face.

"You chew, I savor. Tag-team style."

Hazuki stopped walking.

Stared at him.

"You possess me just to eat meat?"

"Yes."

"...You’re a damn freeloader."

Once Hazuki arrived back at the orphanage, he spotted someone sitting quietly near the front steps.

Elvia.

She was perched on the edge of the porch, hands in her lap, ears slightly perked.

Like she’d been waiting.

"Ah... Mister Hazuki."

Hazuki raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, Elvia. Why’re you sitting out here?"

She blinked.

"Umm... nothing."

He didn’t press.

With the big leather sack still on his back, Hazuki stepped inside and headed toward the kitchen.

Elvia followed, her steps quiet but close—gentle smile never leaving her face.

Inside Hazuki’s mind...

Wow... this new kitchen looks real now.

The counters were new. The floor smooth. The smell of fresh wood and clean air replaced what used to be mildew and broken tiles.

"Where’s Miss Kisha?" Hazuki asked, casually setting the sack on the counter.

Elvia, still just a few steps behind him, replied softly.

"She’s not back yet..."

Hazuki shrugged.

"Whatever."

He untied the wrap on the bag and opened it.

Elvia leaned in.

"What is this meat...?"

Hazuki grinned.

"Drake meat~ Can’t wait to grill it."

"D-Drake!?" Elvia gasped.

Her voice wasn’t loud, but it carried, enough to echo down the hallway.

Within seconds—

Thump! Thump! Thump!

A stampede of tiny feet rushed in.

Chasia burst into the kitchen with the other kids trailing behind her.

"Drake meat!?? Uncle Hazuki’s got drake meat!?"

"Where!? Where’s the dragon meat!?"

"Can we eat it!? Is it safe!? Is it spicy!?"

Hazuki scratched his head and stared at the now-crowded kitchen.

( End Of Chapter )

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