I'm the Villain, But the Heroines Keep Choosing Me-Chapter 66: Why do I feel Like this?

Aldric looked like he wanted to argue further but saw the determination in her face. "I do trust you. I just don’t trust him."

"Then trust that I’m watching him carefully. That I’m not naive. That if he’s manipulating me, I’ll figure it out." She softened slightly. "Please, Aldric. I need you to support my judgment, not fight it."

He left, clearly unhappy, leaving Seria alone with her thoughts.

She sat in her small apartment, surrounded by evidence of guard corruption and memories of her father’s death, and tried to sort through what she actually believed.

Damien was using dark powers. That was undeniable.

But he was fighting demons, exposing corruption, helping her honor her father’s memory. Also undeniable.

He made her feel seen, respected, valued for competence rather than questioned for capability. He let her be human without demanding she be perfect.

Was that manipulation? Or genuine connection?

How did you tell the difference?

She fell asleep still trying to sort through the contradictions, Aldric’s warnings warring with Damien’s vulnerability, head versus heart versus professional judgment all pulling different directions.

---

The next evening, she arrived at the Valcrest estate to find Damien looking worse than usual – exhaustion evident, movements slightly uncoordinated.

"Are you alright?" She set down her investigation notes.

"Fine. Just – the corruption is getting worse. I need to use my abilities less but we keep encountering situations that require them." He poured wine with shaking hands. "Consequences of fighting on multiple fronts."

"Can’t the Saintess help?"

"She’s dealing with Church politics. Emergency council meeting about reform implementation. I don’t want to burden her with my problems on top of that." He sat heavily. "I’ll manage."

Seria studied him, noting the cold efficiency creeping into his expression – the thing he’d warned about. Emotions fading, tactical thinking dominating.

"You need help. Now."

"I’ll manage until – "

"That’s not managing. That’s deteriorating." She moved closer. "What do you need? How do I help?"

[ROLE REVERSAL: SERIA ATTEMPTING TO HELP DAMIEN]

[EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT: SIGNIFICANT]

"You can’t. The corruption requires specific – " He stopped, closing his eyes. "You should go. I’m not good company right now."

"I’m not leaving you like this." The decision surprised her even as she made it. "Tell me what helps. Maybe I can do something."

"You can’t. The anchor bond requires – " He stopped again, clearly struggling. "It requires real emotions. Genuine trust. You don’t – we don’t have that."

"Then what does help? Even temporarily?"

"Honest human connection. Vulnerability. Feeling like a person instead of..." His voice was strained. "But I’m losing the capacity to feel that. Everything becoming strategy and calculation."

Seria made a decision that would probably haunt her later.

She sat beside him, close enough to touch, and spoke quietly. "Then let me help you remember what that’s like. Just this time. Just until the Saintess can help properly."

"Seria – "

"Tell me about your mother. You mentioned she died when you were young. What was she like?"

The question surprised him enough to break through the cold efficiency. "Why do you want to know?"

"Because you asked about my father. Fair is fair. And because I think remembering people who loved you helps remember how to be human." She kept her voice gentle. "So tell me. What was she like?"

He was quiet for a long moment. Then, slowly, he began to speak.

About a gentle woman trapped in marriage to ruthless duke. About gardens she maintained as sanctuary from political cruelty. About teaching her son that power without compassion was just cruelty with crown. About dying slowly while he watched helplessly at twelve years old.

And as he spoke, the cold efficiency in his expression faded slightly. Emotions bleeding back in. Humanity reasserting itself through memory and vulnerability.

Seria listened, occasionally asking questions, creating space for him to be genuinely human rather than tactically efficient.

By the time he finished, some of the worst edge had faded from his eyes.

"Thank you," he said quietly. "That helped more than you know."

"You’re welcome." She realized she was still sitting close to him, their shoulders nearly touching. "We should get back to the investigation."

But neither moved immediately.

[INTIMACY MOMENT: GENUINE EMOTIONAL CONNECTION]

[SERIA: CROSSING PROFESSIONAL BOUNDARIES]

[CORRUPTION PROGRESS: SIGNIFICANT ADVANCEMENT]

The moment stretched, charged with something neither wanted to name.

Then Margaret knocked, breaking the tension. "My lord, the Saintess is here. She finished her council meeting early."

Damien stood immediately. "Send her up. Please."

Seria stood as well, suddenly aware of how the scene might look – her sitting close to him, intimate conversation, obvious emotional connection.

Elara entered, took in the scene with sharp eyes, and something complicated flickered across her face.

"Captain Thornwood." Her voice was carefully neutral. "I didn’t realize you were still here."

"We were working on the corruption investigation." Seria heard the defensive note in her own voice. "I should go. Let you two – " She gestured vaguely.

"You don’t have to leave on my account," Elara said, but her eyes said otherwise.

Seria grabbed her notes and left quickly, feeling like she’d been caught doing something wrong even though nothing had actually happened.

In the hallway, she paused, overhearing through the slightly open door:

"She was helping with the corruption." Damien’s voice.

"She was sitting very close to you." Elara’s voice, trying for lightness but with edge beneath.

"I was losing myself to the corruption. She was helping me stay human until you arrived."

"By sitting close and having intimate conversations?"

"Elara – "

Seria left before she could hear more, her mind churning.

"I don’t see how getting that close– " A pause. " – ah, seems she’s left." Elara noted stopping the act as she heared Seria’s footsteps get distant.

Seria was at the Valcrest estate door now.

She’d helped Damien fight corruption. That was good, right? Professional cooperation extended to humanitarian assistance.

So why did it feel like she’d crossed a line she couldn’t uncross?

Why did Aldric’s warnings suddenly seem more relevant?

And why did the thought of Damien and Elara together – the anchor bond, the intimacy, the connection she’d witnessed – make her chest tight with something that definitely wasn’t professional concern?

She walked home through darkened streets, her investigation notes clutched tight, and wondered if Aldric had been right all along.

Not about Damien being demon collaborator.

But about him being dangerous in ways that had nothing to do with shadow magic.