Heart of Darkness-Chapter 176 - Black And White

Skender went home, cursing himself over and over again. He was letting go of himself and letting the destroyer lead him. He wasn't fighting hard enough.

'I did very little. That was mostly you. Or shall I say us?'

Skender shook his head in denial. It wasn't him. It couldn't be him who want to kiss her on that beach, push them down on the sand, have them naked while he entered, and retreat from her body like the waves washed over the sand and flowed back into the ocean.

It was all just lust. It meant nothing.

'We have sensed her. You know it means something.'

Alright. He knew it. He sensed her as the one. What then? That didn't change that she was human. That she, just like everybody else could leave him. And even if he could hear her thoughts then what? Clearly, humans could fall in and out of love. One day, he could end up alone and grieve again for hundreds of years.

Did you forget that pain, Skender? All the self-blame and guilt you went through not knowing the woman you loved had already moved on. You make mistakes to learn from them not make them again for god's sake.

"Someone is in turmoil. Can I help?" Lucrezia visited him. It must be difficult and confusing for her now that she didn't know what he was thinking. She would have to work harder.

"I am assuming you already know." He said.

"About Roxana?" She smiled.

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"Tell me I shouldn't…" he sighed.

"Shouldn't make her yours? Why not?"

"Give me a good reason why?"

She became thoughtful. "You want her. You will be less miserable."

"Will I? Would you accept a human as your mate?"

She turned around and walked to the chair to sit down, but he knew she was hiding her face for a moment.

"You are also punished. Doomed to have a human as your mate. Is that not right?"

Her eyebrows furrowed and her face hardened in dislike. Right. She didn't want it either.

"Perhaps it is right." She said trying to hide her emotions. "I won't deny my mate."

Was she convincing him or herself?

"But he could deny you? They can deny us? Isn't that also part of the punishment?"

She sighed. "It is but also part of the reward. If they were demons we wouldn't have to fight for them. Try our best to appeal to them. To change to be someone worthy of them." She chuckled as if she found it to be absurd. "If they are good people of course. Also when you fight for something, once you get it you appreciate it more."

Why did he feel like she was excluding herself? What was her plan for when she redeemed herself or would she not?

"What if I don't want to fight for it?"

"It won't be easy. That would mean denying the part of you that is demon. You will need a lot of strength and very good reasons to deny otherwise your demon will not listen and it will be an eternal fight between you two. Also being a demon is new to you. You don't know how to control it and make it submit to you, not to speak of having one that is destructive. It could turn into an ugly fight."

So he needed good reasons? He needed to show the destroyer that Roxana wasn't good for them. That was it. That she would hurt them. Leave them.

It wouldn't be that difficult with her plan to steal and leave him behind. She was mission focused.

With that thought in mind, he went to bed that night. But the bed had become his enemy since Roxana came into his life. It was in bed when his mind and body were tortured by the thoughts of her. She was such a conflicting person. One moment sympathizing with him and taking him out, and the other wanting to steal from him.? One moment being very honest and the other one lying. He had so many reasons to dislike her. He just needed to stop being irrational and remember those things and not be distracted by her amusing thoughts, her constant compliments, and charm. It was enough.

Enough until he remembered Henrik. Skender wished he had not seen that image but he did. First, it was her getting spanked as a child, and now this. He knew there was more. Much more which was why he avoided looking into her mind.

No. You are doing it again. Using what she has been through to excuse what she was doing now.

He turned in bed trying to shut those images out, but he was a demon now. He was not good anymore.

Getting out of bed, he got dressed calmly then he went to look for Henrik in the middle of the night. He had seen where he lived in Roxana's memory but he was still impressed by how fast he found him. Being an archdemon was truly useful.

A moment later, he was in the man's room, looming over his sleeping body. Grabbing him by the collar he teleported them to the river. The place where he wanted to die once.

Henrik woke up by the sudden movement and the cold night breeze but Skender didn't give him a chance to process what happened. He pushed him down and then pushed his head into the water. Shock and panic made him writhe to free himself but Skender let him suffocate for a while before pulling his head out.

Henrik gasped for air, still fighting to free himself.

"Who are you?" He choked.

"Just think of this as a long nightmare," Skender said before pushing his head back into the water again.

When he swallowed some he pulled him out. "Please…" he coughed. "Why are you doing this?"

"Do you perhaps remember Roxana?"

"I-I don't know."

Really?

"Well, then you are of no use to me." He pushed his face into the water holding him down for a good while.

Henrik tried to speak under the water.

"I can't hear you."

He was admitting that he knew her.

"Alright." He pulled his hair and let him fall back onto the ground. Skender stood up, looming over him as the man panted.

"Who are you?" He asked him.

"I ask the questions."

Henrik was thinking of running. "Don't try to run. It will end badly."

His eyes widened and he crawled backward.

"Roxana," Skender said, letting him remember her and think of what he did wrong.

"I-I did not mean to hurt her. I was… it was a long time ago. I was foolish. I regret my actions."

He did not. In fact, he was still the same. Seeing women as nothing but objects to pleasure himself.

"Do you know how to swim?" He asked him.

Henrik's eyes widened. He didn't.

Skender took a step forward and Henrik crawled away fast before getting up on his feet to run. Skender let him run away. He should be terrified of death before dying, besides he liked to chase. Demons used to be predators. Some of them still were.

He let Henrik run away until his lungs gave in and then he appeared in front of him. Henrik stared in shock, blinking a few times to make sure it wasn't an illusion. "How…how did you…" He panted.

Skender smirked. "Do you want to run again or do you want to rest in peace?"

Henrik was still shocked contemplating if this was a nightmare and trying to wake himself up. Then he just turned around and tried to get away again.

It was enough of scaring him now. He caught him and took them back to the river.

"You only have a few breaths to learn how to swim or you will die." He told him and then pushed a crying Henrik into the river.

He watched him struggle to swim to the surface for a while before the waves washed him down the road. Now he would know what fighting to survive felt like.

One less bastard in the world.

Now, which bastard was next?

**************

Lucrezia was now more stressed than before. Why did he have to remind her that she would one day find her mate in a human?

A human. As if she wasn't already in enough trouble. Having a human as a mate would end badly for both him and her? Besides, someone else had already claimed her as his. Someone twisted. Someone who wouldn't let her go. Her torturer.

In her visions, her mate would appear soon. If she only knew who he was? She would eliminate him herself. She had trained her demon for a very long time so she was in absolute control of it. She would not let him fall into the hands of her torturer.

"You look sad." A voice spoke.

It was the little boy. This was usually the place where they used to meet before he started avoiding her. A cliff from where they could watch the military camp.

"I do? Then that must make you happy." She said.

He came to sit a distance away from her. He watched her in silence. She already knew he had conflicted feelings about her. Who didn't? Poor boy.

Lucrezia thought he would get over his fascination as he grew up but strangely he held onto it until now. Not typically human. They often moved on. Found something new to be fascinated with. And he was very much human meaning, he was not just fascinated with her.

The mysterious Lucrezia. If they all just knew. There was no mystery. Only tragedy.

"You are here after a long time," she said.

He shrugged.

Silence. It was soothing, but it also annoyed her not to know what he was thinking. He was the real mystery and she was not used to not knowing.

"I am sure you know about Roxana," he said.

"I do."

"Is she the one?"

"It seems."

Unlike Rayven, Lucrezia rarely had visions about Skender and his mate. She knew why. He was an archdemon. She had been very conflicted about what do to with the destroyer. If awaking him would be the right thing to do. She knew how dangerous an untrained demon who also happened to be a destroyer could be.

As much as she knew William was important to Skender, he was only important to the man, not the demon. The real key was the demon's mate. Only a mate could tame the demon.

But she knew with them still being separate and wanting different things, there would a vicious battle of who takes over the other, and things could take a dark turn. And with the destroyer being a mystery, she didn't know what would happen. What was the destroyer planning? She doubted that he was just giving in and letting himself be controlled. He would not just merge with Skender, not when they wanted different things. He was doing something and she had seen a slight change in Skender's eyes despite the fact that he seemed like himself.

"Have you found the one?"

Why did everyone want to talk about her mate, today?

"No."

"Do you want to find him?"

"Yes. I am eager." So she could kill him. Maybe have a taste before that. Drain him to death perhaps.

"I don't understand that. I mean, how can you just know? What if that person is not nice? Should you not get to know the person and like them for who they are?"

Oh, poor boy. He was heartbroken.

"Knowing they are the one doesn't mean you like them. It means you are drawn to them. It is an attraction. Of course, you will have to know them to develop something deeper."

"What if you can't? What if it only ended with attraction?"

Oh boy. Why did he ask such complicated questions?

"I don't know William."

He blinked surprised. "You are annoyed."

She took a deep breath and exhaled before getting up. He stood up as well. "Are you leaving?"

"Yes. You should go home too, little boy. It is late."

"I am not a little boy anymore." Now he was the one annoyed.

Right. She got so used to it and it annoyed him every time. Poor boy. He wanted to be a man for her. But humans had never been her type even if she was cursed to be with one.

"Alright. Little lamb. Does that sound better?"

He looked horrified before she left with a peal of dark laughter.

"Poor little lamb." If he only knew that she was a wolf in disguise and what she would ask him as the real payment would be his blood. Not to drink it. Not yet anyway. She would store it. Lots of it. For the future. For when she would need it.. For that time would come and it would either be a new beginning or her end.