Harem Streamer System: Every Crime I Broadcast Wins Me a Superheroine-Chapter 183: The Harem Game Show Begins!

Scott sat frozen.

The most uptodat𝓮 n𝒐vels are published on freёnovelkiss.com.

His mind spun as he stared at the screen.

The blue-skinned woman was still talking with the kind of absurdity that made him wonder if he was trapped in some elaborate prank.

At first, he'd dismissed it as nonsense, but the System's confirmation made it all too real.

And then — because the universe apparently wasn't done messing with him — holographic blue screens sparked into existence before him and Jake, filled with live images of bizarre aliens from across the galaxy.

Thousands of extraterrestrials, each more alienated than the last, were tuned into this… whatever this was.

A cosmic broadcast? An intergalactic livestream?

The screens flooded with scrolling comments, moving too fast for Scott to process all at once, but the bits he caught only added to his growing headache.

[Yo, Gwandorian here, what star system is this? Never seen this planet before.]

[Oh snap, I've heard of these guys! They gotta be from the Dairy Path Galaxy or something…]

[Wait, you mean the Milky Way Galaxy? Yeah, yeah, I know these guys. They're called 'humans' or something. Totally shitty race if you ask me… bunch of FOINE intergalactic introverts if I'm being totally honest. 🙄]

[Ugh, not these guys. Bunch of clueless weirdos who call everyone but themselves aliens. I swear, they act like if their planet is in danger, the whole damn universe should care.]

[For real. Never seen a more self-absorbed species. Not even current with intergalactic trends, barely on SpaceGram, but wanna be at the center of everything. Tch. Reminds me of my ex-wife—shitty woman.]

Scott's eye twitched.

On the other hand, Jake looked like a kid who had just been told Santa Claus was real and handing out free gaming consoles to everyone.

His eyes sparkled.

In fact, his grin was wide enough to split his face.

"No way… are these comments actually from real aliens?! This is—this is—THE coolest thing I've ever seen in my entire eighteen years of living!"

His hands trembled from excitement, as if the sheer overwhelming nerd dream of talking to aliens might actually kill him on the spot.

Scott, however, wasn't so thrilled.

His expression remained blank, though the slight furrow in his brow betrayed his thoughts. He slowly turned back to the TV screen as his eyes locked onto the blue-skinned alien woman with suspicion.

As if sensing his skepticism, the woman gasped dramatically, then put on a mock-scared expression.

"Woah, woah, woah, bro! Why the scary face? I was just messing around, c'mon! Chill out, will ya?"

She chuckled as her voice lilted in that maddeningly amused way that made Scott's patience run even thinner.

Scott's jaw clenched.

This was the second time she'd spoken directly to him through the TV screen.

That wasn't normal. Not even remotely normal.

His eyes darted around the room as he searched for hidden cameras or drones—anything that could explain how she was doing this. But deep down, he knew. If she didn't want him to find whatever trick she was using, he wouldn't.

That only made him more frustrated.

"Damn it… how the fuck is she doing that—?!"

He muttered under his breath.

The System responded immediately.

[It is because she is a Thalorian.]

Scott lifted a brow. "A Thalorian?"

[Preparing additional information…]

[The Thalorians are an ancient, pan-dimensional race of blue-skinned, white-haired entities known for their unparalleled reality-warping abilities, boundless mischief, and tragic downfall. Though physically weak, they possess the power to reshape existence at will—turning planets into playgrounds, rewriting the laws of physics as a joke, and playing tricks on entire civilizations.]

Scott inhaled deeply. Exhaled slowly.

Then ran a hand down his face.

"… Okay. That's a lot to take in."

And the worst part? He knew—he just knew—that he'd be the one dealing with this mess. Because if there was one thing Scott McQueen understood about his own luck, it was that if an intergalactic trickster goddess found him interesting, there was no getting rid of her.

As if to confirm his growing sense of doom, the blue woman—this Thalorian—suddenly vanished into a puff of pink dust… and reappeared on Scott's shoulder.

Jake jerked back with a startled yelp.

"WOAH! WHEN'D SHE—"

But the Thalorian ignored him completely, instead looking at Scott with huge, sparkly eyes, like a child who'd just found a new toy.

"Wooooah…"

She breathed excitedly.

"You have a cosmic computer voice in your head! That's so cool! How'd you do that?! Humans definitely don't have special entities like THAT in their heads… well, not the boring ones, at least."

She clasped her hands together, practically begging him for an answer.

Scott didn't respond. Not because he didn't want to—but because he was too stunned.

『She… noticed the System?』

Even the System itself sounded surprised.

[The Thalorian woman has detected my presence. How does the Host wish to respond?]

Scott groaned, dragging a hand down his face.

"Nothing. Literally nothing."

He was too exhausted for this.

He turned a tired, exasperated glare at the blue woman.

"What do you want?"

The Thalorian giggled, then poofed into pink dust again—reappearing behind the couch, this time at her full height of 5'2. She tapped her microphone against her head, then stuck her tongue out playfully.

"Hrrmm… at least ask my name first, sheesh! It's Luminyss! But you can just call me Lumin!"

Silence.

Scott stared. Jake stared.

Neither said a word.

Most of this still didn't make sense.

『This has to be a dream…』

Scott blinked. Then he blinked again.

Nope, still there.

And entire galaxies of extraterrestrial weirdos was currently watching his life like it was the season finale of Intergalactic Bachelor: Earth Edition.

The holo-screens continued flooding his vision to display an overwhelming number of live comments from aliens across the universe.

[Wait, wait, wait, this guy doesn't know what a Thalorian is? Lmao, primitive much?]

[Omg Lumin is back?! It's been literally thousands of years! We missed you, girl!]

[Bro, this guy really just asked "what does she want" instead of freaking the fuck out. What's wrong with him??]

[Not impressed. No tentacles, no bioluminescent features, and he's only got two arms? Mid-tier species at best.]

This gotta be Gleeborp from Gax-9. 💀]

Duuuuude, how'd you know?]

He's friends with some perverted Terran whose account name is SleazyPen… I think? They both touch themselves to nude pictures of Octopussies. 😐]

Damn, reminds me of Intergarm! After that recent post of his new ride on SpaceGram 😩 all the Octopussies wanted him so BAD! I heard he even had them thothies shaking ass on his mega ship and shit…]

[Nah, I actually respect humans for one thing. Their internet toxicity is almost as good as ours. Almost.]

･･･

Scott's left eye twitched. He was being flamed by an entire civilization of space trolls.

『Fucking fantastic…』

Meanwhile, Jake was still staring at Luminyss with his watering mouth slightly agape.

"Holy shit! First contact with an advanced alien species, and it's a blue elf chick hosting a fucking game show?"

His voice practically trembled.

"This is the greatest day of my goddamn life."

Scott slowly turned to glare at him.

"We are not watching the same movie here, bro."

Lumin clapped her hands together as her smile widened and she leaned over the sofa.

"Oh, you two are just adorable!"

She giggled sexily.

"One of you looks like he just got hit by a space truck, and the other looks like he's about to propose to me."

Jake immediately straightened up.

"I mean, I wouldn't not consider it."

Scott smacked the back of his head. "Dude."

Lumin twirled her microphone and grinned.

"But enough idle chitchat! Let's get to the real reason we're all here!"

She pointed dramatically at Scott.

"Congratulations, Scott Evelyn McQueen! You've been randomly selected—well, not that randomly, I totally rigged it—to be the first contestant on…"

She spread her arms, and suddenly, the entire living room morphed into a stadium-sized neon-lit stage with swirling holographic spotlights. A giant logo formed above them in shimmering golden letters—

☆ THE HAREM GAME SHOW ☆

Confetti rained from nowhere.

Scott just sat there, deadpan, completely unmoved.

As for Jake, he whistled in awe.

"Damn, that's some high-tier production value."

Luminyss ignored Scott's lack of reaction and spun on her heel, then raised her mic.

"And for our loyal intergalactic viewers, let's go over the rules! Our contestant—Scott McQueen… as well as his loyal roster of women—will be put through a series of delightfully perverted challenges, all for the entertainment of the entire universe!"

Scott's left eye twitched even harder.

"Excuse me, what?"

Luminyss continued, unfazed.

"And if he performs well, he wins prizes beyond his wildest dreams! Riches, glory, intergalactic fame, a harem of top-tier alien waifus—"

Scott immediately stood up.

"Yeah, no. Absolutely not. Shut it down."

Lumin gasped, looking deeply, dramatically wounded.

"Oh, Scotty, Scotty, Scotty… You wound me."

She clutched her petite chest as if his rejection had physically hurt her.

"Denying an ancient, almighty Thalorian's divine invitation to the greatest show in the universe? How rude! And to think I was going to let you squeeze my nipples, tch—!"

"WHAT DOES NIPPLES HAVE TO DO WITH ANY—!"

Scott hooked at the last moment.

This wasn't worth losing this much composure over.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and inhaled slowly.

"I don't even like reality shows, and I definitely don't like whatever the hell this is supposed to be."

Lumin pouted, then turned to the intergalactic audience.

"Can you believe this guy?"

More live comments flooded in.

[L + Ratio + Imagine rejecting infinite bitches smh.]

[As a Blorpian Elite, this foolish Terran with the brain of a Glorbnorb is actively refusing to become the main character of the universe. Couldn't be me! 😤]

[Wait, but real talk, does he actually get a harem? Asking for… scientific reasons.]

[I feel like this guy is gonna punch a god at some point, and honestly? I'd pay to see it.]

[Damn, Lumin is even sexier than before. I've been rubbing my six penises to her since this went LIVE. 😞]

BRUH, we ain't need to know allat. 💀]

･･･

Scott exhaled through his nose.

"… Are there any friggin' aliens in this universe that aren't terminally online?"

By this time, Jake was losing his mind.

"Scott, bro, you have to do this. Do you even realize how huge this is?!"

He gestured wildly.

"We're talking real aliens. LEGIT ONES! Advanced civilizations! Technology beyond human comprehension! You could win stuff we can't even imagine!"

Scott folded his arms. "Name one thing I'd actually want."

Jake didn't even hesitate.

"A battleship."

Then, he edged closer to Scott's ears like a temptress.

"One exactly like the one in Star Conflicts…"

Scott opened his mouth. Closed it.

『… Fuck. That was actually tempting.』

Lumin grinned.

"Ooooh, someone's interested now, huh~?"

She leaned in closer as her starry eyes shimmered.

"Come on, Scotty~! It'll be fun! Think of it as… a vacation from all the bullshit in your life! No Nightwatch drama, no hero politics, just games and prizes!"

Scott looked at her skeptically.

"And if I say no?"

Lumin tapped her chin, then smirked.

"Well… I could just teleport you onto the stage anyway and start the first round without your consent, but~ I am a woman of culture, so I'd rather you agree to it first."

Scott narrowed his eyes.

"So I either accept willingly or you're just selfishly going to force me into it anyway?"

"Exactly!"

He groaned and dragged a hand down his face.

"Of course."

Jake clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"Bro, come on, just do it. For science."

Scott glared at him.

"How the fuck is this scientific?"

Jake looked him dead in the eyes.

"Because if you reject the chance to get a space harem, I'll literally write a research paper on how you're the most mentally ill human in recorded history."

Scott sighed heavily.

Lumin clasped her hands together.

"Sooooo? What's it gonna be, Scotty~?"

Scott let out the deepest, most exhausted sigh of his life.

Then, with pure resignation, he muttered:

"…Fine."

Lumin's face lit up.

"YES!!"

She jumped into the air, did an unnecessary number of flips, and snapped her fingers—

And in the blink of an eye, Scott, Jake, and their entire living room vanished from Earth.

A second later, they reappeared on an enormous floating stage, surrounded by billions of watching aliens, screaming like they were at the Super Bowl of degeneracy.

Luminyss pointed at Scott with a manic grin.

"LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!"

Scott and Jake glanced around and their eyes widened as they took in the absurdity of it all.

The overwhelming brightness of the holo-screens.

The deafening cheers of the intergalactic audience.

The completely alien atmosphere of it all—it was a lot.

It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say Scott was even more amazed than Jake.

But when Jake noticed this, he immediately turned to Scott with a teasing grin.

Realizing he'd been staring like an awe-struck child on a Christmas night, Scott quickly cleared his throat, looked away, and muttered—

"Ehhh, I mean, it's alright, like…"

Jake gave him the weirdest, most knowing smile ever.

Just then, someone screamed at the top of their lungs—

"SCOOOTT!!"

Scott turned his head so fast he nearly gave himself whiplash.

Both he and Jake shouted in disbelief—

"Wait… isn't that BRIGID?!"

Indeed, Brigid was standing right next to Luminyss, her face lit up like a kid getting picked up from school. She waved both hands wildly with her excitement completely unchecked.

Scott's brain short-circuited for a second.

"What the fuck is she doi—"

And then, realization hit him like a truck.

The sheer dumbness of this entire situation.

This game show nonsense. This reality-warping madness.

It had to be Brigid's fault.

Only she could come up with something as out-of-pocket as a harem game show.

His expression deadened and his eyes got half-lidded as he let out a long, exhausted sigh.

"Oh. Now it makes sense… sigh~"

Presently, the shock value of everything was gone. He didn't even have the mental energy to be surprised anymore.

Luminyss bending reality like Play-Doh? Whatever.

Brigid somehow ending up with her? Of course.

Nothing made sense anymore.

Meanwhile, back at the commentary stand, Luminyss held her microphone close.

Her voice boomed across the mega stadium.

"WHAT'S UP, EVERYBODY?! Welcome to the grand premiere of what's soon to be the number one show in the universe—The Harem Game Show! And today's episode is called… 'TO HAREM OR NOT TO HAREM!' hahaha!"

The moment she finished speaking, the entire alienated crowd erupted in chaos.

Billions of aliens waved their diverse limbs — tentacles, crystalline arms, robotic claws, gooey appendages — anything they had, they threw it into the air in sheer excitement.

Some even started bouncing off the walls, literally.

The whole place looked like a cosmic rave from hell.

Luminyss turned to Brigid and grinned.

"So, sister, what are your thoughts on today's events? How do you think this is gonna play out?!"

Brigid took the mic and, after a brief moment of deep thinking, finally responded.

"Well… well, I can't say for sure, but one thing I do know is that I am absolutely brimming with enthusiasm at this remarkable development."

Silence.

Luminyss stared at her like she'd just witnessed the dumbest moment in history.

Confused, Brigid blinked. What?

She had specifically chosen big, intellectual words so that aliens wouldn't think humans were dumb.

Already reading her mind, Lumin sighed.

"Pssssh, you don't gotta do all that, sister! Most of these aliens are dumb as a rock. I even tweaked the laws of the universe a bit so everyone speaks the same language! Kinda like a universal translator thingy… hahaha!"

Then her face twitched.

"… Oof. Yeah, I should probably fix that later before I get called to the Cosmic Court."

Without warning, she poofed into pink dust and teleported directly onto Scott's head.

Her soft, plush ass landed perfectly on top of his skull.

There was a small satisfaction she felt from pressing her ass cheeks against his head — which was unusual considering Thalorians weren't known to be easily sexually excited.

The entire stadium EXPLODED into deafening screams.

Aliens of all shapes and sizes completely lost their minds.

"HEY, THAT SHOULD BE ME!!"

"LUMIN, SIT ON MY HEAD!!"

"WHY DOES HE GET TO HAVE ALL THE FUN?!"

Tentacles waved wildly. Weird alien appendages flailed.

Even a few robotic drones in the audience were sending out high-pitched "BEEP BOOP, ENVY DETECTED."

Scott, meanwhile, just sat there, dead inside.

Still. Unmoving.

Though… there was one thing.

A faint, sweet scent drifted into his nostrils.

It was so intoxicatingly sweet and arousing that — absolutely unconsciously — he licked his lips.

He froze.

『Wait, why the fuck did I do that?』

Reading his thoughts, Luminyss giggled.

"Oh, that? Yep, that's because Thalorians, in our physical forms, have one of the sweetest-tasting reproductive organs in the universe~"

Then, she leaned forward slightly as her breath warmed against his ear.

"And if I get high ratings on this game show, I'll let you lick it to your heart's content~"

Scott's soul left his body.

On the other hand, Jake saw everything.

His eyes widened in unholy realization.

He immediately grabbed both his hands and shoved them over his crotch.

"HOOOOO, CALM DOWN THERE, LITTLE ONE… I CAN'T JAKE IT HERE…!!"

With the deepest sigh of his life, Scott facepalmed.

"Never. Read. My. Mind. Again."

Grinning, Luminyss kicked her legs playfully as she sat atop his head.

"Oops, did a little too much brain-picking~"

Then, suddenly, her expression changed.

"Ooooooooh… but what's this?"

Scott had no time to react before she snapped her fingers.

In an instant—a blinding burst of light filled the air.

And when the light faded—

They were surrounded.

Beautiful women. A LOT of them.

Miss Mercury. Pulsar. Dog Girl. A Dark Elf (who was supposed to be in critical condition but somehow looked perfectly fine). Gwen. Judy Cho. Rope Girl. Witch. Deathmark. Vixen. Foxgirl.

Even Ezel, the Pontiach female.

Every single woman Scott had ever been involved with — romantically, sexually, or even slightly—

They were all here.

And all of them? Staring right at him.

Scott blinked. "Oh."

Jake whistled. "Ohhhh."

The alien crowd?

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

The excitement only flattered Luminyss.

"Oops. I did a little more, sorry… and other than the tragically sad abuse and trauma he went through as a child, I managed to source out the full list of women you're romantically involved with—or at least had a romantic encounter with. And you know what? I actually like all of them. They're so unstable."

She gave Maya a small stare.

"Especially her. But that's probably because she always gets screwed over. Kinda sucks, you know? I like her."

The Harem Game Show…

Had officially begun.