Fantasy Assassin in a modern world-Chapter 162 - I want to be stronger

162 I want to be stronger

Michael was on his bed the image of the tragedy a few days ago clear in his mind. The screams of horror, the pleading looks, and the despair, it was like a scene from hell itself. Even though he had gained new abilities he could not save those that were within his reach. He had gained power and was able to protect himself, but he was not like those protagonists in novels who are able to save all they wanted to save.

Michael could still see the face of the boy who begged him for help. Michael told him that everything would be alright, he told him that he would save him, that he would be able to go home but in the end, he watched that little boy die in front of his very eyes. That was the first time in Michael’s life that he felt truly helpless.

‘Damn it! Why, why did this have to happen?!’

Michael hasn’t slept for the past three days, but with a body of a martial artist, it was still alright. Still, no matter how hard he tries he could not sleep, for every time he closes his eyes all he could see is the face of the dying boy. Even in the end, the little boy believed that he could live and that he could go back home to his parents. As Michael was wallowing in his despair somebody knocked on the door of his room.

“Michael, it’s your dad, are you awake?”

Michael did not respond as he lifted up his blanket covering his face. Even though he did not respond Michael’s dad entered his room. When Michael’s dad saw his son pretending to sleep he sighed and sat in the nearby chair.

“Your friend Shin was here again, he gave me this and told me it will help you recover.” Michael’s dad placed a box on the table and looked at his son with a worried expression.

“It has been three days since you came back, but it seems like my son hasn’t truly returned yet. I won’t say I understand what you’re going through since I don’t. I’m not a martial artist nor was I there when you had to face that tragedy, but I am your dad and I worry for you, even your mom keeps on crying for you. I know it might not seem like much but she and I are here for you and I can listen to your worries.”

Michael remained hidden under his blanket not responding at all, seeing him like this Michael’s dad sighed. He then stood up and was about to leave the room.

.....

“Michael any time you feel like you want to talk, you know where to find me. Also, your school called and said classes will resume next week, but you can go whenever you’re ready.”

After saying he wanted to say Michael’s dad once again looked at Michael and left. Once he heard the door close Michael looked at the box on the table. As he was thinking about what his dad said, a voice suddenly spoke in his mind.

‘You see everyone is worried about you. Moping around here won’t change anything. So how about preparing for the next time? Surely you understand if you were stronger, you would’ve been able to do more.’

When Michael heard what the Spirit said he clenched his fist until it bled.

‘You don’t think I don’t know that?! I’m already doing everything I can to become stronger, yet even now I’m still too weak. Is there any way for me to get stronger faster?’

‘You don’t know that kid, you don’t owe him anything, his death is not your fault and you already did your best. So why is this bothering you so much, are you trying to become some sort of hero?’

‘A hero?... I see... I think I might have thought of myself as something like that since I got you and was able to use mana. I thought I was some sort of chosen one. Now I know I’m not a protagonist from a novel, I can’t be a hero that can save everyone... But... I want to at least become someone who is strong enough to save those that are within my reach. I just want my life to continue without someone dying before me. I already failed twice within a week, I don’t want to keep on failing. Please, I know that you must have a way to make me stronger.’

‘...’

‘Please...’

There was an awkward silence between the two, and after a while, the Spirit sighed in Michael’s mind.

‘There are a ton of ways to become stronger immediately but almost all of those ways have a high price. Usually, it would be your eternal soul, your loved ones, or basically, anything precious to you will be taken away. Sometimes those ways give you what you want but in a way that messes with you, like giving you ultimate power but you’re unable to use it in battle. The only surefire way to get stronger without paying such a price is training.’

‘I-‘ Michael was about to say something but was interrupted by the Spirit.

‘I know what you want to say. You were going to say that you would give anything just to become stronger, that you can take it no matter the price, but I assure you, you cannot handle such deals. What you want is to protect people with your power, gaining power with those kinds of shortcuts, will only lead to failure... It will not be able to fulfill your wish.’

‘Then how, what can I do?’

‘Only that guy can help you now.’

‘That guy?’

‘The irritating guy who’s teaching you how to expand your mana supply.’

‘Sir Loki?’

‘Yeah him, I already told you before that guy has been hiding his power and skill. I don’t know how he does it, but every time we meet him his aura keeps on changing. The pace at which he grows is different from everyone else. So surely he must know a better way to get stronger. So if you want to get stronger faster, you better find a way for that guy to train you.’