Craved by the Wrong Volkov-Chapter 177: The truth

Braelyn’s POV

I could feel the water rush into my lungs. It felt like I was in that water again, and she was trying to drown me.

My mother was alive and she attempted to kill me. I didn’t understand how she was alive or why she tried to kill me.

Maybe my head was messing with me. Dad wouldn’t lie to me. I was pulling my hair so hard my skull went numb to the pain

The twisting pain in my heart and the heavy, suffocating pain in my lungs made it hard to breathe.

Tears burst out of my eyes, and the scream turned into a muffled sob. "Was it possible?" I whispered to myself, clinging to a fractured lie.

Suddenly I remembered Gregor’s letter. I didn’t understand what he meant then but his words felt like a warning

No matter what, remember your parents loved you.

But which mother will want to kill her daughter?

The second warning..I shouldn’t leave Raphael. I had a very bad feeling about this.

I wiped my tears with my bloody hand that was cut by the shards. I turned back to the diary. This was the secret they hid from me, and I had a bad feeling this wasn’t the worst.

There were more skeletons to be found, and they were hidden in the diary. My chest was beating fast from the earlier shock. I steeled myself and rose up grabbing the remaining diaries...

My hands were trembling as I continued flipping. The first diary had the same content repeated over and over again.

Did Avelina lose her mind? Was that the reason she tried to kill me? I wondered, but my heart couldn’t help but twist further seeing those words repeat over and over again.

The hatred in each stroke. Who was the monster? I refuse to believe it was me. The first dairy didn’t have any other useful things.

I slowly set it aside and I glanced at the other diaries. My hands were trembling from fear of what I would find in them

I picked up the next one. Using the same hidden key I opened it.

"You can do this.." I assured myself then drew in a very long breath before flipping the page.

The first page held the name Avelina Alderheim. This time, the handwriting seemed organised.

I swallowed a hard lump trying to concentrate on the page and not the blurry tears at the corner of my eyes.

I flipped to the next page, and my eyes widened. The pages were torn. Did mum tear it herself? The beginning pages were torn. I ran my hand on the rough edges. I sighed, then glanced at the first page that wasn’t torn.

Then it started, once I started reading I could not stop.

******

October 8th, 1997

I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. I can’t even look at my own hands without wanting to be sick.

No matter how much I washed, my hands had blood remaining. The scrubbing doesn’t work.

I only went to the east wing that day because I heard shouting and ugly words slicing through the walls. Katerina’s voice, her desperate pleas, I couldn’t ignore and the sharp sounds of broken glass. The mansion was empty because Gregor had given all the staff a day off after his nasty argument with Katerina.

I still can’t believe he brought that witch into their home with her baby. Still can’t believe the fact that he cheated, Gregor loved Katerina. It makes me scared that Dominic might do the same thing to me.

Katerina had called me, she was desperate, slowly spiralling, but I didn’t expect to walk into a fight.

There was another voice, younger and defiant, answering back just as viciously. If I could turn back time, I wouldn’t have opened the door. I would have run in the opposite direction but I didn’t

But I could not leave Katerina like that.

I opened the door and they were in each other’s faces. Katerina’s cheeks were red, her eyes wild, screaming about betrayal, about how dare she show her face here after everything. The younger woman didn’t back down; she laughed, bitter, threw it all back, and called Katerina old and haggard. Spitting out words I didn’t want to recall

I froze in the doorway. I should have left. I should have closed the door and pretended I heard nothing.

But Katerina saw me. Her eyes flicked to me just a second and something passed over her face. The girl turned too, sneered, said something I couldn’t catch, an insult, I think.

Katerina couldn’t keep it in any longer. She slapped the girl and that lit the fuel. Chaos broke, and the girl completely overpowered Katerina. They were trying to strangle each other

I couldn’t watch, I charged inside screaming they should stop. Something glinted under the light. I ran fast then shoved her hard. The blade slit her stomach and fell from Katerina’s hand.

The force of the push had the younger woman stagger back, arms windmilling, and hit the wall with a sound I’ll never forget. She slid down slowly, eyes wide, blood already pooling under her head and her stomach where Katerina cut. Our hands were covered in blood and we both stared.

Katerina whispered her name once, like she couldn’t believe it. Knelt, touched her neck, shook her shoulder. Nothing. She’d just given birth... she was still weak, still bleeding from it. Too weak.

We ran for help. We swore we did. But the house is big, and the night was dark. The doctor arrived, and he said it wasn’t really major and she could survive

Gregor hid it, hid the fact that she was in a coma. We just had to wait for her to wake up. We could fix it, there were not going to be any charges but Katerina called today

She died in a coma. The push had really scrambled her brains.

Katerina keeps saying it was an accident. That we were defending ourselves, defending her and everything she had. That no one will believe a mistress over us. Gregor will handle it. He always does.

But I saw it. I overheard Dominic talking to Gregor earlier. The main course of her death wasn’t the stomach wound but the concussion.

I killed her. I am a monster and she would not let me be.

I see her in my dreams, standing at the foot of the bed, blood in her dark hair, lips moving slowly. Sometimes she looks angry. Sometimes she just stares, pointing at me.

I don’t know how to carry this.

My hands feel dirty. Why did I have to push her so hard?

Forgive me.

I don’t know who I’m asking, but I have committed a sin I can never forget.

Avelina