Coldsnap: The Billionaire Alpha's Fated Pregnant Princess (GL)-Chapter 424 - Cleansing Thoughts Can Leave Unclean Reality

Chapter 424: Chapter 424 - Cleansing Thoughts Can Leave Unclean Reality

A/N: No active sex, so I might not title tag R18 - but a few NSFW terms and descriptions. Warning levied!

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***[POV: Common Consequence Citra]***

"Give me... give me your hand."

Brief moment of sense, sort of. She’s going to be so confused.

Vrika is not here and can’t modulate this world’s mystical arts for me. Like I’d been letting it do, lazily, without thinking.

...

"Keep going. Ah, mmm - don’t let me bite you!"

Another sudden clarity - without only my own willing whimpers and manic moans filling my mindscape. Double? She thought this pull would be *just* double?

> I’d *welcome* double! The Fated thing isn’t nothing - I shouldn’t have ever thought that! <

Apologizing to a Goddess who isn’t likely to be listening, if she has any sort of propriety, isn’t going to get me anywhere. I just have to-

...

"Kyrie... please... I’m begging. Hold me down tighter. Be rough if you have to."

Oh, I know it. I know, I know. She would have instantly snapped and marked me back if this was given to her. I made the right choice. No regrets.

Maybe a little, small, miniscule regret. That my companion was left out of enjoying this with us. The bond and... well also...

> Feels weird to think. It’s weird, right? After all the times I told it to stop paying attention... <

Maybe I should pray for my soul. Cleanse. Cleanse, you deviated thoughts!

...

"Shānti... Shānti. Tṛptāsmi, Pyārī. Thank you. It was wonderful."

Honestly? I wouldn’t have blamed her if she marked me back. Somehow I managed to channel the bond desire into mere sexual release. That is to say, it was pretty good.

’Mere’ sounds rude. But still that was one of the worst, most uncontrolled experiences of my life. At least being depressed when I was young simply made me stop functioning.

That? That was...

> Actually kind of fun in hindsight, because of how dangerous. How she could have done anything and everything if she also lost her mind. <

I really shouldn’t be thinking that. Not when she is looking at me with *that* much concern... so I rally myself and roll to my feet. Before she can start asking the sort of questions I don’t want to answer.

My legs are steady. Perfectly fine. In control. Not wobbly at all. Just have to... stretch this way a bit. Pretend that I don’t want to return the favor to her.

That we are moving on from this and its details, like the unusual mess on the floor by the window. That there isn’t a physical feeling, thanks to the tantric positioning I took to grow accustomed to her bond, very similar to dried honey encasing my nipples and smeared across my breasts.

> My wolf would have hated that promiscuous memory, but I can’t help it popping in.<

The fact that I am now a milk making entity known as a mother and that orgasms... release the same hormone that leads to let-down? I guess there was a truly good reason those books highly suggested keeping towels nearby, if engaging in sex during the nursing period...

"We should clean up."

Her eyes stay on me as I walk with tiny winces. Entirely from the extra tacky substance that pulls at my skin. Over to the various wipes and sanitizers.

Certainly not what she bought them for, directly. But it’s still going to be used for keeping this room nice and tidy overall - so I think it counts? I can also get the rest scrubbed off in a shower.

> Oh, this isn’t good. I can feel my face doing that thing. It’s making that smug, *satisfied* smile. Shouldn’t turn back around. Shouldn’t, shouldn’t... <

But I do, after using some pure water wipes to get as much congealed milk off me as I can. Turning partially to the playpen gives me an excuse not to look directly at her, but still lets her see me.

As pleased as if I’d just hunted a chicken on my own.

"Still sleeping. Remarkable, really. I thought we might have woken him."

Laying roughly where I put him down at, I can also see his breathing motion. Absolutely fine. It’s perfectly fine that I sat him down in there so we could do *that*.

I shouldn’t feel guilty at all. Mhm. Yep. It started as one thing and then ended up another. Nothing to be ashamed about.

Just wasted some of his food source.

> Look at that, now I feel extra good and extra bad all at once. I’m a miracle worker. <

I can feel my stance growing defensive, even while smiling. She hasn’t said anything for a minute to me now, this woman. Starting to get scared that I’ll look over and see an Alpha extremely pissed for making her do this.

She also might have reasoned out my hidden plan already. Or just was very much not okay with the things I just asked her to do. I doubt both of those, on some level.

It wasn’t really that bad, after all. If I remember everything. Sincerely hope I do. Because it will be a good memory if she decides to withhold sex to get me to cave-in later. And I could use every bit of detail to meditate on and control myself.

"So..."

When I raise my eyes again and angle openly toward her, I see that very *still* look. Distant. But familiar in the way that eases my heart and likely means Claire is speaking into her skull.

I know what I said before was a joke. To make her wield some new perspective on her choice. But I’m starting to think it might not be bad to have one of those in me.

If it means we could speak to each other at a distance...

Maybe I shouldn’t make drastic decisions when I could still be being affected by the Fated Bond. I’m at least twice certain that I did not possess *this* much desire to have her voice in my head, constantly speaking sweet nothings. 𝕗𝕣𝐞𝐞𝘄𝐞𝚋𝚗𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗹.𝚌𝕠𝚖

> Unlike my soul, which has clearly craved it. <

My mindscape was now weirder than ever. The entire vast field of flowers was now one big solarium. In the distance, I can see the great smoky quartz panels that look like office building windows and massive white metal framing.

I guess it’s meant to be a subconscious show of the cage I’ve found myself in by binding with her. Yet, looking in every direction I can only feel a sense of tranquil, immeasurable distance.

Like the unrestrictive walls would move right along with me. Up into the clouds, down into the ground, or just right where we are.

> She would stay. At whatever distance I request. That’s why- <

"We have some problems."

Blinking away the almost intentional timing of her interruption, I refocus on the set of brown eyes and their interesting new glow. Still orange, but if I thought they looked like the fire of a candle before?

Now they feel much more like a full on sunset. With unflickering flakes of salmon-coral and vermillion-umber. My candlelight has become a stable fire-opal.

And I don’t entirely understand why, but have strong suspicions based on the reason *my* eyes changed.

> Maybe I should have studied more ahead of time, about what could happen if I gave into this... inevitable choice. <

Who knows what might have occurred when she marked me, of all people. Not a soul from this world. Blessed by their Goddess. The system even lists my species as *something* different from a normal Werewolf, with that silly | ⚝ | next to my species.

A little research into taboo history could have made things safer. Instead of just avoiding it because I felt there was no possibility to bond. Thanks to the very child that she’s now been nothing but receptive and caring to...

> That she always would have been just as nice to. She’s not the one changing a bunch. I am. <

The ’extra bad’ is starting to win, here. Pulling ahead of the *good* left by this afterglow.

And I don’t think that hearing about the ’problems’ will make it better.