Classless Ascension-Chapter 322: That Goddamn Song!

A group could be heard rushing through the foggy castle corridors. Their heavy footsteps resounded along with low shouts.

"Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!" the old lady encouraged the group.

They had completely given up on being discrete. It was only a question of time before the enemies regrouped. Honestly, the whole situation was quite ironic as an event for Climbers had been shut down with none able to resist.

This was all because of that damn new poison that countered the general antidote pills that most carried with them at all times. Josh couldn't help but feel that there was something profoundly wrong with how they were able just to rush unimpeded.

"Where the heck are the enemies?"

"I'm not sure, but this doesn't bode well."

"Maybe they're just scared of that chain-breaking guy?"

This nickname sure was a mouthful. Chain-breaking guy? Was that all Josh was to them? He began mumbling to himself in a voice almost as deep as Greece's debt.

"Call me John, John Doe. I am the chain exorcist, the nightmare of all BDSM enthusiasts, the worst enemy of slave owners…."

"You, what the fuck are you saying?" A Climber nearby uttered in shock.

"Oh, I'm just getting into character." Josh replied nonchalantly before resuming his mumbling: "…The destroyer of restraints, the freedom warrior, the…."

As they listened to his whispers, they couldn't believe how quirky (dumb) he was. Still, they couldn't help but unconsciously move a bit away from him. They didn't want anything to do with his nonsense.

Regrettably for them, the long corridors were exceptionally peaceful and the mumblings would continue. It was as if nothing bad would ever happen. Where were the unimaginable hardships? What about the mighty enemies? At least they would fight, right? Nope!

It was only corridor after corridor, always looking the same, always sounding the same, always smelling the same. It was so freaking similar every time that they risked dying of boredom!

But, it soon became worse. Why? Josh began to sing…and they would soon learn how terrifying it could be!

It transcended being a bad singer. It was downright discordant and harmful…

♫♩

This sure is a lovely castle

Perhaps one day I'll own one

Then again, when all is said and done

It could very quickly become a big hassle

♫♩

The Gemini members' voices resounded in the background:

"What the heck is this?! Is that singing?!"

"This is the most horrendous thing I've ever heard."

♫♩

Do I really want a castle?

Could I settle for a mansion?

After all, the first requires vassals

It'd definitely be a hard transition.

♫♩

They all complained except Lana:

"Please stop! This is torture."

"Yeah, please stop, chain-breaking John Doe!"

"Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!"

♫♩

Could you picture me here?

In something so damn colossal

It would be as if coming out of a novel

Plus, I kinda still consider the sewers dear

♫♩

"Oh god almighty, please give me the strength to resist the temptation. I know murdering this bastard is a sin, but it's so hard!"

"Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!"

♫♩

This is such a hard decision.

Is this really the life I envision?

I am so plagued by indecision.

But it's fine, for ━━

♫♩

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut the hell up!"

"Make it stop! Make it stop already!"

"Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!"

The Climbers held their heads with both arms, trying to filter the sound. But, they were unsuccessful. It was as if the magical (?) melody could pierce straight through all their defenses.

They begged, squirmed, cried, and even howled in despair. "I beg you. Please stop singing. I'd prefer physical torture to this!"

But all that Josh did was radiantly smile at them, somehow chilling them to their very core. That's when he shook his head happily: "No can do. Since I've been interrupted, I'll have to restart the song. Here we go…."

They couldn't take it anymore. With a shout, the nearest Climber rushed at Josh, drawing a huge hammer, one that was as big as any braggarts dick! (Self-measured)

The enraged Climber's muscles bulged as he swung his weapon with the force of a thousand men. It landed straight on Josh's face, crushing his skull, pulverizing his torso, and it kept going until there only remained a bloody red stain on the floor.

"I did it. I freaking did it! We're free! Freeeee!" The Climber celebrated. Hell, he felt happier now than the day he had lost his virginity.

"You did it, brother. I'm so proud of you!" his colleague patted his back joyfully.

"Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!" The old lady still encouraged the group.

They were so happy that they ignored her completely. Yet, she just gave them a slightly disapproving glance but remained quiet.

That's when a ghastly sound resonated, one that they could never forget, one that sent their thoughts into disarray.

The stain on the floor began to sing. It was a sound so discordant and straight-up harmful. It was a silly castle song they recognized, one that they dreaded….

♫♩

Do I really want a castle?

Could I settle for a mansion?

♫♩

It was restarting all over again.

That one Climber once more grabbed his hammer. He began trashing the floor. He had to make it stop! The rocky castle tiles exploded all over the place. The shrapnels dug into his skin, but he didn't care.

He was going to kill him at all costs!

"Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!"

He kept ignoring her. He lived only for one thing right now: to make the damn singing stop! Why didn't it stop!

His friend even joined him as the both of them attacked the floor relentlessly.

At first, they were baffled by the impossible situation. Then they began sobbing uncontrollably. Afterward, they resumed screaming in anger.

Since nothing seemed to work, they ran away. They left the place entirely, but the stain moved with them, it followed them, and worst of all, it kept singing.

They screamed, despaired, cried. They lived every single negative emotion humankind could fathom.

Then they felt empty, they wanted to scream and cry, but all they could do was swing their weapons.

"This will never end. This is our life now."

"We're stuck here forever. I hate castles."

Their voices couldn't be more despondent.

"Say, should we kill each other?"

"Ah, that's a good idea."

That's when Lana's voice resounded yet another time. "Go, go, go! Quickly, before another group shows up!"

They shared a look. This was a usual occurrence by now, one they hadn't paid much attention to at the beginning.

"Poor thing, she already went crazy. We're not even moving."

"Alright, let's die at 1. Are you ready?"

They nodded at one another, ready to end it all.

"…3!"

"…2!"

That's when one of them had a flash of insight and jolted violently. He began observing his surroundings, confused. It was as if he had just woken up from a nightmare.

"Wait a minute!" He interrupted the countdown.

"What is it?" The friend answered groggily.

He couldn't help but shiver as he saw the look of his friend. They had both been about to commit suicide. Had he looked as dead a few seconds ago? Oh god, this had been a close one.

"There's something strange about all this." He remarked.

"About what?"

"All this! Everything around us!" He shouted excitedly.

"What do you mean?"

"We keep seeing the same corridor, Lana keeps repeating the same thing like a broken record, and that damn singing won't stop no matter what!"

The groggy Climber seemed to take a while to process the information, but then he also jolted in shock. He could only stare at the weapon in his hands with fright.

"What the fuck were we thinking?!"

"Don't worry about it. Can you hear this?"

"All I can hear is that fucking singing!"

"Exactly! Does it sound different to you now?"

"Yeah, it's still the same, but I can tolerate it now. I can't believe that guy is a fucking traitor!"

"That's not it. Listen carefully. It doesn't seem to be coming from this place!"

"What?! … You're right! But, where is it coming from then?"

"Outside, I think we're under an illusion skill right now."

"I see… That's one crazy ability then."

"Alright, let's go."

"Go where?"

"Follow the singing."

"Fuck no! I wanna go as far away from it as possible!"

"Think, we gotta find him to kill him."

"Ah, you're right!"

Thus, the two Climbers followed the grating sound. They simply walked in the corridor as they had always done, but this time it was different. After walking 27 meters, they found a glowing purple barrier.

There went nothing….

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Gemini's group was assembled around two guys that were standing in a deep slumber. In the background, Josh was singing— if it deserved that appelation.

"They sure are taking their time."

"Yes, hopefully, they'll awaken soon. I really can't wait."

"Yes, I really can't take much more of this discordant song."

That's when suddenly, the victims' eyes began fluttering open. The first thing they did as they regained true consciousness was to charge at Josh with incredible killing intent.

"I'll kill you!"

"Die, you monster!"

But, they were instantly restrained by their colleagues who had been ready for this. The two guys on the ground kept thrashing around but couldn't move one bit.

"Why is it that they always want to kill me? I just helped them find their way back!" Josh sighed, his heart heavy.

They had all been the same. Their desire to murder him had carried them out of the illusion. He really didn't know how to feel about that. His singing wasn't that bad, right?

Well, all had been the same except Lana. She had managed to extirpate herself from the spell from the beginning, and they had collaborated to bring back the others.

After a few seconds, the furious Climbers finally regained control of their emotions and felt very awkward. They had tried to kill their savior. Talk about ungratefulness!

But, luckily for them, Josh didn't press the matter. Instead, he turned toward them all.

"Now, let's run for real. Try not to fall for an illusion this time around."

They all nodded heavily, slightly shivering. This trip turned out to be even more dangerous than they initially thought.

They resumed their pace, as they had before. From start to finish, they hadn't seen who had placed the spell or for what purpose. They were going completely blind and hoping that they'd somehow make it out alive.

Every step they took rendered them warier than the last. Every single second of peace irritated their nerves. Every breath had them wonder if they were still awake.

All until they reached a solid old-school metallic door.

"Behind this door is our destination." The recruiter uttered solemnly.

As they pushed it open, some green light blinded them. There was a giant chain in their way...

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[A/N] Anyone got mind-fucked at the beginning? xD

Creator's Thought

To this day I still don't know who cast this illusion. I swear, those guys had come prepared. They had plenty of abilities, all odder than the previous ones. It's a shame that Lana was awake and watching me. Otherwise, I could have accomplished my assassination.