(BL) Mafia Love; He who falls the hardest loses-Chapter 132: Six months

Time flew by too fast. Soon he would have to confirm if Haruki was willing to renew the contract with him or not. Even with his arms around Haruki at night, he could not help but think about what would befall him if Haruki decided against renewing the contract.

Haruki moved in his arms. He closed his eyes and remained still even as Haruki rose from the bed and he heard the door of the bathroom door close. They were at his house as usual since it was Wednesday.

He remained still even after Haruki came back to sleep but as though the man knew he was not sleeping, Haruki turned and faced him. His fingers brushed against Hiroshi’s eyelids before sliding down to his lips.

"Go to sleep, you will be busy tomorrow," Haruki told him firmly before turning away.

Hiroshi knew he could not lie that he was sleeping. That would just mean a confession anyway so he wrapped his hands around Haruki’s waist and pulled him closer.

His nose pressed against Haruki’s neck, he took in a deep breath and murmured, "You can’t abandon me."

He was not sure if Haruki heard because all he got as a response was the even breathing of the man he held. He was scared, Haruki was nice to him, accepting all his advances, treating him in a friendly manner.

The sex was good, and the time they spent in each other’s space made him feel like a character in a happy slice-of-life novel. They had become a part of each other’s daily life. They ate dinner together, slept on the same bed and sometimes had sex in the bathroom before going to bed.

It felt like an endless honeymoon period. He was so happy but he could not ignore that troublesome feeling that always threatened to steal his smile. He always thought of what would happen to him when the days were over.

He sensed that if things went on the way they did, Haruki would want him in his life even after the contract ends. His goal of becoming someone Haruki could not live without had turned into him feeling as though the world would end if Haruki didn’t want him anymore.

He was scared but knowing that regardless of the affection in Haruki’s eyes mentioning love would ruin it all. He was not certain if Haruki would truly end it if he confessed his feelings to him but he was too cowardly to take the risk to confirm.

That could be a test of their love but it was a test he was unwilling to take.

"I told you to go to sleep," Haruki’s deep voice warned the man whose tension had been making it almost impossible for him to sleep lately.

Hiroshi was shaken by the sudden statement. "I am sorry."

For the past couple of weeks, the doctor had been so tense, it felt unnerving. He would wake up in the middle of the night and remain that way until dawn. After an hour of nap, he would be up and head to work as though he enjoyed his night’s rest.

Once Haruki tried using sex to tire the man out so he could sleep but the man remained away after it, Haruki never tried it again when he woke hours late.

There was something about the man’s sleeplessness that kept him away against his will. This was not something he could explain even after trying to simply ignore the worrying man, he still found himself begging for sleep whenever the man was awake thinking.

He could guess what the man was so worried about after all, he had Kiyoshi investigate if anything was making him anxious at work.

Haruki with an exasperated sigh, sat up and turned on the lights. He glared at the man who used his hand to cover his face due to the bright light.

"What has you so worried?" Haruki asked reaching to tap Hiroshi.

Hiroshi finally dropped his hands from his face and sat down his eyes downcast as though he was wronged. "I am not worried about anything."

Haruki knew what the man was so worried about. Since it was causing direct damage to his sleep quality, Haruki saw an immediate need to handle it. Two weeks of waiting for the man to sort his thoughts out and return to his usual calm and warm self was enough and he had run out of patience.

"Really?" Haruki asked with a hint of sarcasm as he met Hiroshi’s gaze firmly daring him to lie again.

"The six months are almost over," Hiroshi said, looking away from Haruki’s piercing gaze and reminded him.

"I am very much aware of that after all, I was the one who made you sign it. Why should I lose my sleep over that? If you don’t want to sleep, you can spend the night in the study."

Hiroshi swallowed. The firmness and subdued anger in Haruki’s deep voice as he brushed back his hair, made him shiver slightly. Coupled with the fact that he was at risk of losing the chance to sleep with Haruki.

"I am sorry," he apologised regaining his usual calmness as he met Haruki’s gaze.

Haruki scoffed and shook his head. "Don’t tell me you have feelings for me," Haruki’s voice held a warning. The words warned him to think properly before he responded.

Hiroshi felt his heart race. Yes! He wanted to announce so proudly. It was a privilege to love someone like Haruki. They had shared so much vulnerability, so much warmth, and so much intimacy, at least he deserved to announce to Haruki his feelings, right?

However, like a scared dog with its tail between its legs, he could not let his master know his thoughts. He knew he had to back down.

Hiroshi laughed and shook his head. "I never said that," he didn’t deny his feelings because it would be a lie to himself, something he didn’t want to do even for Haruki’s sake. "I am not worried about the contract either, you said you will renew it anyway. I think I have been drinking excessive coffee. I am sorry."

Haruki rolled his eyes and shook his head before turning the lights off satisfied with everything. As the two of them got under the covers together, their bodies drawn to each other as usual, sharing heat, Haruki stared into the dark.

I love you. Those words had only been curses to him. Anyone who says those words to him will die. It was best that the doctor keep it buried for as long as he wanted because that was the only thing that could save his life.

Hiroshi boldly kissed Haruki’s neck when he noticed the man had not slept yet. It was his fault Haruki woke up and now Haruki hadn’t gone back to sleep. He sucked on the warm skin and rubbed the skin under the silk pyjamas.

When his fingers found their target, they rubbed and pressed until he got a moan from Haruki’s lips. A smile lifted the corners of his lips and pushed the covers away from their body.

The place he touched hardened as though inviting him to do more. He straddled Haruki’s waist and unbuttoned his shirt. With the shirt out of the way, his fingers slid over Haruki’s body.

The smooth skin covering those firm muscles made him go crazy. There was barely any light coming into the room heightening their sense of smell and hearing. Haruki moaned with every kiss mark Hiroshi made on his body.

At that moment, he wanted Haruki to be the canvas where he could paint the love he had for him. He could not say it in words, but he could show it in his actions and he was certain Haruki could feel it in his touch.

Their lips brushed against each other as their breath mingled until Haruki lifted his head to seal their lips. Warm not hot, wet and sweet. He swallowed lifting his hands to hug the man straddling him.

He moaned into the kiss as the man held their hardened members together and rubbed them lubricated by the precum that dripped out. That wet sensual sound filled their ears along with the sound of their tongue against each other moistened by their saliva.

Hiroshi took it slowly and gently ensuring they were both in a relaxed sensual state until his hand was covered in thick white substance. So close to Haruki, he could see the man’s eyes staring into his when he pulled away from the kiss that Haruki had been unwilling to let go of.

Their moans and heavy breaths finally began to calm down. Hiroshi reached for wipes from inside the nightstand and wiped them both clean. He knew Haruki would want to be as neat as he could before going back to bed but he didn’t want Haruki to shower.

By the time he was done ensuring they were both very clean and all the traces of what they had just done were gone, he sighed in relief. Haruki had fallen asleep as he hoped.

He leaned closer and kissed the man before rising to dispose of the used wipes. When he returned to the room, Haruki was glad that Haruki was still sleeping so he got under the covers and pressed his body against Haruki’s back.

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