The Crippled Bigshot's Little Ancestor Is Too Cool - Chapter 36

After being fired from his job due to a baseless accusation and dying while trying to save a girl from a robber, Maximilian is reincarnated into a world where caped heroes and superpowered villains clash in the streets.Disillusioned by a life of injustice and unrewarded good deeds, he vows to live for his own satisfaction. Armed with the Greatest Villain System—a golden finger that promises to make him the most feared villain in history—Maximilian sets out to embrace his dark side.First Mission: Beat up innocents.An old, retired hero thanks him for preventing a terrorist attack.Second Mission: Destroy a hero monument.Maximilian ruined an unlucky villain career.Third Mission: Beat up a famous hero.A detective hero praises him for exposing a criminal’s crimes.System: “Maximilian, are you messing with me?”Maximilian: “I’m innocent!”Several heroes who think they’re privy to the truth: “Maximilian, you are the most selfless hero we’ve ever met!”Maximilian: “I’m a villain, you idiots!”As Maximilian struggles with his new life as a villain and tries to prove his villainy, he uncovers numerous conspiracies within the new world’s government.Will Maximilian be able to prove his villainy? Or will he be remembered as the greatest hero of all time!?

Bro!

You wouldn’t believe this!

Everything was normal. Me and my bros doing some mining for mana gems for that old sockethole, Somanda like we always do all day, everyday.

Me, Fractures, Bonet, Mono-socket, Broadbone and the gang.

Then from nowhere, that ungrateful sockethole, Somanda tries to END me! Can you believe that?!

I mean, I have told some questionable stories about him caressing my skull affectionately and deeming me his prized undead, but no need to axe a skeleton for something like that, right?

RIGHT?!

I managed to escape through one of the most convenient and contrived get-aways in all of undead history, even managing to pull a bony one on the Lich bastard by stealing two of his seemingly important possessions which I find out later to be better than I thought they’d be!

From there it’s a just a SPIRAL of boneshit left and right! I can’t catch a break! What’s with this atrocious luck, bro?!

A voice speaks to me about how I have qualified for something about a something that’s supposedly something’s something!

Then I find myself in a new world that reeks of life and gives my bones a disgusted rattle.

Powerful beasts and men are at every turn, all lining up to be a huge pain in my PELVIS!

GAAAAH!

Jeez this is happening too fast!

However, even while I’m in the thick of this, the one saving grace is that I got something worth while!

A new path of power!

I can NOT be an undead!

I can be something better than both the Living and the Dead!

Immune to the antics from both sides. Well... most of them!

I’m no longer on the path for Undeath!

Only Lifelessness awaits me!

I’m the one who transcends reality in this tale!

I am... SKULLIUS!

And I’m not an UNDEAD!

.......

[Sneek Peek]

“What kind of skills are these? What can I do with them? They better not be worthless VOW Bro!”

[Please refrain from calling me- you know what, whatever! Scroll down to access the actual descriptions about the skills].

Um ok.

Click.

~~~

[ Supreme Skill ]

[ Flesh It Like You Mean It | Lv. 1 ]

Tired of looking dead? Are your eyes hollow? Do you need to smile and show off something other than bones? Call on the power of cosmetic flesh and get a body that's to your liking (not really).

----

[ Supreme Skill ]

[ Lifeless Evolution ]

Tired of the same old undead evolutions? Is being undead not trendy anymore? Is your Lich a sockethole who doesn’t admire your efforts? Well then, try the Lifeless Evolution Package. For strong, unorthodox and peculiar evolutions that will knock your skull off.

-IfyouareseeingthisinyourGuidancefielditmeansthatthisskillisboundtoyouandisnon-refundable-

~~~

I’m going to regret this right?

......

Three years after entering the palace, Yongning Palace’s Beautiful Lady Yan Shu, has still never met the Emperor.The palace full of concubines tried to win his favour, only she, immersed in a melon eating system, has no time to spare for him.[The heir of Marquis Lin Wu isn’t his son, tsk tsk.] [A high ranking official in the conservative Ministry of Rites is unexpectedly taking part in a taboo relationship with his own daughter-in-law!!!] [Grand Princess Yi Ma’s prince consort has unexpectedly raised several concubines outside!]Everyday is filled with gossip, who would still remember who the Emperor was?How would she know that one day, she actually ate a shockingly big melon——[The iron-blooded Emperor who seems cold and aloof on the surface actually suffers from an unspeakable unmentionable disease.]Yan Shu, “!!! No wonder he never enters the harem!”Wait…There seems to be something wrong somewhere… then what did she enter the palace for?!!The new Emperor, Yu Wen Lan, has two secrets.Since his ascension to the throne, he has gradually lost his male functions; yet at the same time, he can read minds.Getting used to seeing their false words and hypocritical faces every day, he grew all the more unfeeling.That was, until one day, he heard a special heart’s voice——[Isn’t this a f*cking waste of natural resources?]Yu Wen Lan paused, narrowing his eyes to look in the direction of a delicately pretty and pure looking girl.[God, for you to make such a handsome hunk unable to XX, doesn’t your conscience hurt at all?] [Is there any way to revive it???] [Ten-fold complete rejuvenation of spring pill, restoration of a man of character pill; if those don’t work, then have you tried return of the yang acupuncture?]Yu Wen Lan, “???”Until she ascended to the position of Empress, Yan Shu also didn’t know how she had jumped unreasonably on the Emperor’s bottom line repeatedly, yet had jumped straight in, becoming the first person to be in his heart.Perhaps, it was just her good luck.

Broken-hearted and drunk, Yoshida, a 26-years old salaryman, stumbled upon a runaway-from-home high-schooler on his way back from the bar.

“Hey, you. JK.”*

“What the heck are you doing out here. Go home already.”

“Uncle, let me stay at your place for the night.”

“You can do ‘that’ to me if you let me stay.”

“If you meant that as a joke, it’s not funny.”

“I’m not joking. It’s fine by me.”

“Then allow me to tell you that I have no interest in brats.”

“Hmm?”

“Then, just let me stay.”

Notes:

[*] JK is slang for Joushikousei (high school girl)