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... apparently, my one-month anniversary with a girl who decided that counted.

"You’re not serious."

"I’m dead serious," she said, eyes sparkling like she’d just told a child Christmas was canceled unless they coughed up a Ferrari.

"One month?" I asked.

"One. Whole. Month," she repeated, stretching each word out like it was sacred scripture. "Thirty chaotic, emotionally unstable, possessive, kiss-filled days."

I sighed into the phone. "That’s not even a thing ...

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