Sword Saints Should Go Tank - Chapter 529 - : Billions of stars, billions of cannons

He just wanted a quiet vacation and a good espresso... instead, he ended up seducing half the city.------Lux Vaelthorn wanted three things: a good coffee, peace and quiet, and zero responsibilities.What he got?A mansion, a system with the personality of a deadpan butler, and a bunch of heiresses fighting over who gets to be his first “investment.”As the heir of Greed and Lust, Lux was born to dominate markets, hearts, and boardrooms. But after centuries of cleaning up his parents’ messes in the underworld, he rage-quit Hell’s finance department and took a hundred-year vacation to the mortal realm.His problem?Even without trying, he’s too hot, too rich, and too damn magnetic.His Incubus Pheromones seduce emotionally unstable rich girls like clockwork.His Greed System scans bank accounts like X-rays.And thanks to a “minor” celestial bounty on his soul, some entities either want to marry him… or murder him.[Warning: 3 rich virgins detected within 15 meters. Incubus Pheromones activated.][Recommendation: Flee. Or flirt. Your call.]Lux just wanted caffeine.Now he’s got a mansion full of horny heiresses, a schedule full of power plays, and a city that thinks he’s a billionaire playboy CEO.Fine.If he can’t nap… he might as well rule.

Bad news: Xu Yanmiao traveled back to ancient times, but he himself is lazy and uninterested in anything but internet cybersecurity, which is useless in ancient times.Good news: He’s bound to a system.Bad news: The system is called the Gossip System, not the fortune-telling kind, but the kind that contains other people’s private information and scandals. Utterly useless.More bad news: This system is also glitchy, and the extent of the bugs is unknown.Even more bad news: This body is that of a minor official who can attend court meetings, while Xu, the time traveler… doesn’t understand the classics, can’t write with a brush, and is at risk of being exposed for cheating in the imperial exams.Xu Yanmiao: “…”Forget it, just lie low, wait to die, maybe dying quickly could lead to another time travel.…In the court, the emperor was furious about state affairs, and the courtiers trembled in fear.Xu Yanmiao pretended to listen attentively but was actually focused on browsing the Gossip System.[Wow, the emperor just took in a 16-year-old noblewoman yesterday! A beautiful addition! He’s getting stronger with age! And he was tossing and turning in bed all night but still has such a powerful voice now! Amazing!] [This noblewoman used to be the crown prince’s concubine! And the crown prince even knows how to write passionate love letters!] [Wow wow wow! The crown prince sneaked into the grandpa’s harem… hiss—got intimate while the old emperor was attending court! Do it quickly! Why isn’t there any video…] [Huh? Why is there no sound?]Xu Yanmiao cautiously raised his head and glanced around.[What happened? Why is everyone kneeling? Where’s the emperor?]—The emperor went to catch adultery in the harem.The “imperial exam cheating” bomb finally exploded.Xu Yanmiao couldn’t explain why his handwriting on the exam paper didn’t match his usual handwriting, nor could he answer why he didn’t understand the classics.The evidence prepared by the ousted crown prince of the emperor hit the nail on the head, and his personal bodyguard was ready to drag Xu Yanmiao away to the prison, awaiting execution in the autumn.Xu Yanmiao held onto the gossip that proved his innocence but was in a quandary:How do I explain the source of my information…[Say that I secretly met with the Chief Examiner, the Minister of Rites, three nights before the exam? Impossible, that night, the Minister of Rites was dressed as a woman, spent the night at the General’s Mansion, with the general…]The general’s body shook, and he interjected: “Your Majesty!!!!”“Although the evidence of exam cheating is solid, I believe there’s still something fishy about this. It should be re-investigated! Especially Xu… Xu… Xu Yanmiao’s attire is neat and tidy! Someone who cares so much about their appearance, how could they tarnish their reputation!”The crown prince, who couldn’t hear his thoughts: ??[Also, what’s with saying that the examiner faking yawning and tiredness was intentionally leaving me a gap for cheating? He spent the night before the exam in the pigsty without sleeping, how could he not be tired the next day? But, surprisingly, the Imperial Academy lecturer actually believed in pig’s milk…]The Imperial Academy lecturer’s face went pale, and he burst out: “Your Majesty!!!!”“I… I agree with the General’s words! How could Xu Lang cheat in the exam! He… he… he deliberately drank a glass of pure water before the exam, believing that only good-hearted people can use pure things, such a kind-hearted person, how could he cheat in the exam!”Thinking he had everything under control, the crown prince: ??Xu Yanmiao was deeply moved.[They’re all good people, even if their brains don’t work well, they’re trying their best to find reasons and excuses for me.] [But I really have no way to turn the tables, alas, it’s a pity that I haven’t finished watching the TV series I’ve been following. The old emperor angered the empress last night and got kicked out of the bedchamber, and now I’m going to die before seeing the ending. He seems to be planning to paint his face with ink and pretend to be a cat to cheer up the empress…]“Bang—”The old emperor slammed the table, forcibly interrupting the continuous stream of thoughts: “I believe Xu Yanmiao did not cheat in the exam! Release him, innocent!”The civil and military officials couldn’t wait to echo, fearing that if they were too slow, Xu Yanmiao might spill more gossip.“Yes yes yes! Release him innocent!”“Long live Your Majesty!”“Your Majesty, please end the court session! Let Xu Lang go home and rest! You’ve tired him out by making him stand for so long!”The crown prince: ??Did Xu Yanmiao drug them with hallucinogens or something?

In a modern world, a professional assassin was murdered by her beloved and found herself revived in an ancient world as ...In a modern world, a professional assassin was murdered by her beloved and found herself revived in an ancient world as a general's daughter with a weak physique. She was engaged to a prince, but because she did not have a nice appearance, her fiancé and sister attempted to kill her. Although she had to struggle to survive, there were also those who unconditionally loves her that supported her in her time of need.How does she intend to adapt and survive in such a foreign and hostile world? Follow Gu Xijiu on her journey to discover her one true love!

The entire entertainment circle knew that whenever leading actress Du Yu Shu and Emperor Ye Jingan encountered each other, in their free time they would speak with poison on their tongues and release gunpowder all around them in the air-ready to destroy, their poor relationship was to the point where fans from both sides had already given up on fighting with each other.

But no one knew that Du Yu Shu was actually a very big fan of Ye Jingan, every day she would go online and praise him #bow to male god, #male god is very handsome, #male god I want to give birth to a little monkey with you, #give birth a flower goddess # fan in true love;

At the same time, no one knew that Ye Jingan was Du Yu Shu’s fan, every day he would go online and worship her #goddess, #please marry me goddess, #seeking to support the goddess, #I’ll kneel so please look at me goddess #this is true love ;

Until one day, they both entered into the same entertainment variety show- causing the entire entertainment circle to go mad, though it was a very delightful spectacle to watch, one day, they fell off a horse.

—I heard you like me?

—So?

—Well I like you,

—I like you too.

Small Theater:

When the news broke out that Ye Jingan and Du Yu Shu would attend the same reality show, fans from both sides started crying tears→

→ Fan A: goddess, why didn’t you think this through clearly! A good reality show will become a murder scene, the director will cry!

Fans II: In order for the program to run without any problems, the director must not put male god and goddess in the same group ah!

Fans three: I think the real purpose of the reality show is to make Male God and Goddess’s battle of the sharp tongues into a full on war-conflict!

A year later, Ye Jingan made a Weibo posting :

Ye Jingan V: Thank you, we are together.

Now, fans have felt that they need to see a doctor, an optometrist.

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