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... > Bob became aware for the first time. Like the big bang, his new consciousness rippled through his body as all the million individual nodes became connected into one single being. They all pulsed in sync as he had his first-ever thought.

"I'm hungry."

There was a lot to unpack here. First, who was I? Apparently, he had a name... Bob.

"Bob hungry."

No wait. "Bob is hungry."

He, the great Bob, was hungry. Why was he great? He decided he was. As for hunger? ...

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Beta: Ahhh! Damn it... When will the good day come?

Author: Well, don't ask me, I just got here.

Beta: Fuck it! I want a good story.

Author: Junior, trust this senior, this is a good one

Beta: Arggh! Shut up! I hate it.

Author: courting death! Go and ask Yama how good this is.

Beta: Y-You, how dare you?

Author: I will give you 10 breaths of time, cripple your cultivation, and scram!!

Beta: Good! Very Good!

Author: *Raises his eyebrows and turns beta into useless dust particles*

-----

Chad: senior, I have been enlightened, I wish to know more about what you have in this ancient script.

Author: ah! An intelligent and wise junior, you have raised a very good question. Here are things this forbidden ancient script contains.

•Sinful activity: this book contains the profound sinful activity of balancing the Yin and Yang, by, shoving the mighty Yang rod in the Yin Hole.

•System - MC relationship: fuck... Ahem* Ahem* sorry for tongue slip. Forget the classic old system, here take this hot waifu tsundere system. ( not that edgy )

•Steal everything: junior! Are you tired of Mc only stealing the jade beauties that were created for the protagonist? Well, let's process further and add the Protagonist's mother, aunt, and sister, into Mc's harem.

Chad: oh! The senior really blessed me with such a divine forbidden Scripture, here take my money and give me the chapters.

Author: oh! Ho Ho! I haven't finished yet.

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