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... ll-blown lecture. "The layout is all wrong. The colors clash, the font choices are amateurish, and don’t even get me started on the photography. It’s a disaster."

I flipped through the pages, squinting. "It looks fine to me. It’s a magazine, not the Sistine Chapel."

"It’s not fine," he snapped, exasperated. "There’s only one picture of you in the whole thing, and that maid practically dominates every other page. It’s nauseating."

I glanced back at the magazine and noticed ...

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