MTL - Metropolitan System - Chapter 1949 Please help me.

The moment when mercenary leader Kwang Hwi receives video game like abilities, the world is suddenly thrown into chaos. A thick fog envelops the Earth, bringing with it savage, otherworldly monsters. At the same time humanity has been rendered defenseless against this onslaught, as the strange fog turns most weapons to rust. With mankind spiraling towards oblivion, it is up to Kwang Hwi, with his new abilities, to save the world. Watch as Kwang Hwi leads his militia and becomes the last bastion of humanity. Will he be this world’s savior, or its conqueror?

Lin Qingge’s body was pathetically weak, so weak that just taking a few steps would make him gasp for breath. His own family treated him like he didn’t exist. His birth mother died when he was young and his father promptly remarried and knocked his stepmom up. His father didn’t like him, his stepmom looked askance at him and his step siblings coveted his position. Who told him to be the lawful eldest with inheritance rights?

When Lin Qingge was eighteen he came out of the closet, creating a huge rift between him and his family. It was all for that guy, Liu Yang. He’d whispered sweet nothings in his ear, saying things like he’d protect him and bs like that. Lin Qingge’s old man blew his top when he found out and promptly disowned him. That didn’t matter to Lin Qingge, he had Liu Yang afterall. He fully believed in that guys words and goodwill.

If only he wasn’t so stupid…

Ultimately Liu Yang was like a vampire sucking his wealth dry, leaving a husk behind. After pushing Liu Yang to a high position, Lin Qingge finally collapsed in his apartment. It was a sad sorry sight. Closing his eyes, he knew this was the end of him. Who knew he would wake up instead in a different time and a different place?

Eh? What’s this? Well fine! This time I’m gonna hug that brother’s thigh real tight and never let go!

- Description from Novelupdates

There’s SIS in great Britain, CIA in the US. In Huaxia, there’s Dragon Division, known as the mysterious power of the East.

When a soldier that originally failed to be selected to join, appeared on the Dragon Division’s list again, no one noticed, that this inconspicuous and humble looking guy was actually the Dragon King of the division, the one that’s most difficult to deal with.

He was a man, whose appearance gave every one existential crisis, including a fly that was consecutively caught by him with a pair of chopsticks.

Of course, this story is hilarious as well.
[Shen Yao laughed. “You think I would help you? For what reason?”

Xu Cheng sighed. “Shen Yao, to be honest, you are really pretty.”

“Humph.” Shen Yao snorted coldly, “Can you elaborate on that for me?”

“I don’t know how to get into details, but I can only say that when I accidentally tore your skirt today, I got a boner.” ]

- Description from Novelupdates

Question: “When one summer day, you find a cucumber inexplicably appearing on the vagin of a beautiful woman in the living room, how should you save her?” “A. Pull it out” “B. Suck it out” “C.**********” Years later, when Li remembered this scene again, he hated himself for not choosing C... --------- “Yikes, what’s pressing against me?” Meng Lin instinctively exclaimed, immediately looked down, and upon seeing the alarming outline, she exclaimed in surprise, “Qianfan, why did you put your white cane inside your pants? Are you afraid someone will steal it? Let sister-in-law help you take it out!” With that said, Meng Lin reached out her hand… ------ “Sister-in-law, were you masturbating yourself?” Li Qianfan pretended to be shocked. “A cucumber has fallen inside my vagin, can you help me get it out?” No wonder his sister-in-law looked so thirsty; it was because she was often unsatisfied. “Sister-in-law, don’t cry, I’ll help you get it out right now!” After offering comfort, Li Qianfan placed his palm on Meng Lin’s thigh and began moving slowly towards the place where the cucumber was submerged……