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... e. Even so, I can’t deny that I had never held out the hope that perhaps luck would be on my side. Sure enough however, it seems that such a too-good-to-be-true development won’t happen. If such a too-good-to-be-true development was ever going to happen, then surely I wouldn’t have experienced quite as much suffering as I have to date. Such a thing never happened as this world isn’t so nice as to let me have hope. The conclusion that can be drawn from all this, is that I will be defeated.

...

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“What are you doing? ” he asked solemnly

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