I Can Assimilate Everything - Chapter 1: Life is fickle! I

—〔WSA 2025 ENTRY〕—What happens when fate twists reality itself? What if someone finally obtains the one thing they've longed for since birth?Arvian got reincarnated into a horrible novel after performing a ritual to claim mysterious rewards offered by Webnovel—the Webnovel System and an Exclusive reward.Waking up in a cave surrounded by a villainous organisation, Arvian found himself; luckily, he was reincarnated with his own body.He sees cruel people, bloodlines, demons, reapers, monsters, and elves, and unfortunately gets dragged by UNHUMAN MISSIONS.Follow Arvian as he finds himself stuck with unhuman missions after failing a mission.Ding!][System Initializing...]...[All Activation Conditions met][Webnovel System Activated!]Congratulations! The Webnovel System has been successfully activated![Webnovel System]:「Gain 3x rewards for completing quests, missions, or eliminating enemies.」「Access the Novel Store, where you can purchase any item or ability of your choice from the novels you have read.」

He was once the most feared villain in the empire, a master of manipulation who wove chaos from the shadows. Ruthless, untouchable—until the day he was betrayed and executed by the very man he sought to control.But death is not the end.He awakens in the body of Lady Elara Valcrest, a fragile noble girl doomed to be a pawn in political games. Stripped of her former power, she is forced into an arranged marriage with none other than Cairon Everhart—the man who once killed her. He does not recognize her, but she knows him. And she will never forget.To survive, Elara must play a new game. One where deception is her only weapon, and trust is a dangerous illusion. She must outmaneuver her enemies, uncover the truth behind her execution, and reclaim the power she lost. But as she navigates the treacherous world of court intrigue, one question lingers—Was Cairon truly her greatest enemy? Or had she been blind to an even greater threat?Time is running out. The villain has been given one last chance. And this time, she refuses to lose.

Come here folks, let me tell you a wondrous story about a bizarre world.

A world with two moons and three suns.

A world where death is never the end and birth is just the beginning of misery.

A world filled with stories of love, war, and betrayal.

A world where the gods are bored of the mundane as much as you.

And then there is I, the maestro of this bizarre world that exists solely to entertain you.

So follow me and enjoy the misery as much as I do.

*****

A mentally ill man who only finds the meaning of life in twisted entertainment stumbles upon the supernatural world. A world full of chaos, and entities that can cause one to go mad. But what if you are mad to begin with.

Let’s watch our Jester as he crafts entire plays to entertain an audience that only exists in his head.

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Duke Jiu Qiansui, Du Gu Wu, was forced to marry the rejected woman Feng Bailin due to illness, causing an uproar in the court.The princes came to “congratulate”: Although Feng Bailin is ugly, incompetent, and from a declining family, she does not fear his reputation of being a wife-killer and impotent, and even conveniently lets him be a cheap father. Worthy of congratulations.Du Gu Wu, thinking of the talentless, unattractive, and unvirtuous woman, coldly said: After one year, I will divorce.One year later, Du Gu Wu booked the largest restaurant in the world, invited friends to prepare for the divorce.Unexpectedly, the restaurant owner directly offered three days for free, saying it was to celebrate the divorce. When the first beauty who was mingling with heroes from all roads burped, she said: “You think I'm after his body, I just crave his imperial fortune.”After Duke Jiu Qiansui was divorced,In the first month, a plague swept the whole city, and the medical deity appeared, it was actually Feng Bailin.In the second month, famine was everywhere in the country, the richest man provided disaster relief, once again it was Feng Bailin.In the third month, an alliance of nine dynasties besieged the city, and ten thousand beasts defended it, it was still Feng Bailin.In a certain month, Duke Jiu Qiansui traveled across the nine provinces and eight wildernesses to pursue his wife: Ancestor, please let me marry in.The two cute children said in unison: Father King, you have to wait in line!