Detective Ghost Empress - Chapter 458: Not wanting to let go of that thief

Alex Hunt was a smart man. By no means was he a genius, but he stood solidly in the above-average class of society. He thought that when he died, he would at least go with a bang.

Sadly for him though, his death was as generic as they came. Struck to death by a truck driven by a drunk driver who wasn’t looking. ‘At least there’s a bang…’ He thought as his head banged on the concrete.

He thought that that was it for him, but destiny had other plans.

He was reborn. Reborn as a Symbiote in a version of Earth that was definitely not the MCU. And with a system to boot.

He didn’t know what he was going to do. But his first priority was to survive in this chaotic world that he’d just found himself in. One that’s far more chaotic than the MCU but similar at the same time.

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In a world of countless enemies, the right talent is all it takes to thrive. Freddy Stern, a twenty-one-year-old cashier, has lived a plain, albeit harsh life. Having been orphaned—twice—he’s spent the last ten years working and staying out of trouble. His only aspiration is to save enough money to become an archhuman. His dream gets the jump on him when he barely survives a near-death encounter and finds himself with 1% Lifesteal, a bizarre talent with numerous contradictions and just as many uses. With every dead enemy, he becomes a bit stronger, a little wiser, and a lot more ruthless. And no matter how much damage he takes, he can always put himself back together. Physically, at least. But on his path to power, after having to look at the rotting guts of archhuman society again and again, can his talent keep his mind and soul as pristine as his body? Or will that part of him simply remain broken?

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn’t help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire.

Firstly, what in the world is the “Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis” spell? And don’t even get me started on the “Osteoporosis” spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like “Blood Burn,” “Gradual Freeze,” and “Mental Chaos.” Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities?

Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield “Doomstorm” and “Ice Age,” swordsmen boast “Sword Rain: Homecoming” and “Wind-Cutter Slash,” while archers showcase “Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars” and “Storm Arrow.” Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named “Cancer Cell Proliferation,” “T-Virus Infection,” and “Rabies Outbreak.”

In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, “Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!”

Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, “Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don’t know!”

Even a boss character confesses, “Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!”

Jiang Dao died extremely heroically in the apocalyptic world war. He never thought that he would have a chance to open his eyes again.

He traveled through, into a danmei book he had read, and became a vicious villain in the book.

Jiang Dao thought to himself: “After more than ten years of fighting for my life in the last days, I’m tired, so what am I fighting for? It’s better to be a vase. Use my face to finish the brokerage contract, and then find a corner in the world with beautiful scenery and live a peaceful life of growing vegetables, cooking, and raising cats and dogs…”

So, he returned the role that the original owner had snatched from the protagonist shou on the spot.

Unexpectedly, in the variety show that started shooting the next day, Jiang Dao performed a shoulder toss and threw the current number one kung fu actor, Chu Yinlong, to the ground.

Chu Yinlong: Boy, you have successfully caught my attention. My new movie, the villain, can fight, you come.

Jiang Dao: …Sorry, I’m just a vase.

————

In a later interview.

A reporter asked Chu Yinlong: “How would you rate your perfect partner, Mr. Jiang Dao?”

Chu Yinlong replied: “A vase.”

Reporter: “How can a kung fu superstar as famous as him be a vase?”

Chu Yinlong: “Diamond vase. Precious, beautiful, hard enough.”

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