Destroying My Own Novel - Chapter 3

Bro!

You wouldn’t believe this!

Everything was normal. Me and my bros doing some mining for mana gems for that old sockethole, Somanda like we always do all day, everyday.

Me, Fractures, Bonet, Mono-socket, Broadbone and the gang.

Then from nowhere, that ungrateful sockethole, Somanda tries to END me! Can you believe that?!

I mean, I have told some questionable stories about him caressing my skull affectionately and deeming me his prized undead, but no need to axe a skeleton for something like that, right?

RIGHT?!

I managed to escape through one of the most convenient and contrived get-aways in all of undead history, even managing to pull a bony one on the Lich bastard by stealing two of his seemingly important possessions which I find out later to be better than I thought they’d be!

From there it’s a just a SPIRAL of boneshit left and right! I can’t catch a break! What’s with this atrocious luck, bro?!

A voice speaks to me about how I have qualified for something about a something that’s supposedly something’s something!

Then I find myself in a new world that reeks of life and gives my bones a disgusted rattle.

Powerful beasts and men are at every turn, all lining up to be a huge pain in my PELVIS!

GAAAAH!

Jeez this is happening too fast!

However, even while I’m in the thick of this, the one saving grace is that I got something worth while!

A new path of power!

I can NOT be an undead!

I can be something better than both the Living and the Dead!

Immune to the antics from both sides. Well... most of them!

I’m no longer on the path for Undeath!

Only Lifelessness awaits me!

I’m the one who transcends reality in this tale!

I am... SKULLIUS!

And I’m not an UNDEAD!

.......

[Sneek Peek]

“What kind of skills are these? What can I do with them? They better not be worthless VOW Bro!”

[Please refrain from calling me- you know what, whatever! Scroll down to access the actual descriptions about the skills].

Um ok.

Click.

~~~

[ Supreme Skill ]

[ Flesh It Like You Mean It | Lv. 1 ]

Tired of looking dead? Are your eyes hollow? Do you need to smile and show off something other than bones? Call on the power of cosmetic flesh and get a body that's to your liking (not really).

----

[ Supreme Skill ]

[ Lifeless Evolution ]

Tired of the same old undead evolutions? Is being undead not trendy anymore? Is your Lich a sockethole who doesn’t admire your efforts? Well then, try the Lifeless Evolution Package. For strong, unorthodox and peculiar evolutions that will knock your skull off.

-IfyouareseeingthisinyourGuidancefielditmeansthatthisskillisboundtoyouandisnon-refundable-

~~~

I’m going to regret this right?

......

Bai Ye traveled to a very strange world where food is the sky and became a chef. He thought it would still be an ordinary life, but he slowly discovered how strange things always came in in this world.

What the hell is a gourmet cell?

What happened to Totsuki Academy?

Are the legendary kitchen utensils true or false?

Even the Sword Art Online Food Hunter version has come out, what kind of trouble do you want to make…

Although I feel that few people read it, I still set up a book friend group, welcome to join the home cook, group number: 553438462

- Description from novelbuddy

Tian Shen was your average unordinary guy—living a monotonous life. One day, fate (or rather, Truck-kun) decided to grant his wish… by sending him flying into another world at 120 km/h.When he woke up again, he found himself in the body of an outer disciple of the Beast Taming Sect. His talent? Nonexistent. His reputation? Of a molester’s. Just when he thought he was doomed to be cannon fodder, a golden screen appeared before him.『Ding! Congratulations, Host! You have activated the Attribute System.』『Congrats host, you killed 5th stage of body refining realm cultivator and gained Qi points ×30.』『Congrats host, you killed 1th stage of Qi refining realm cultivator and gained Luck points ×80.』『Absorbed white Attribute orb, gained 1-star sword.』『Absorbed golden Attribute orb, gained divine Artifact.』Tian Shen: “…Huh?”Armed with his new system, Tian Shen embarks on a ridiculous journey—casually strolling through battlefields to collect fallen attributes, dodging cultivation technique manuals (which drop on his head), and even trolling young masters into fighting just to farm their stats.But as he levels up in the most absurd way possible, he soon realizes… is he cheating too much? Because now, heavenly tribulations, ancient sects, and hidden experts are all eyeing him.Tian Shen: I am favored by the AUTHOR of this book, you lots can't even handle my shoes.*Rumble**Crackle*Again Tian Shen: I-i was just joking, don't take it seriously.**BOOM**

From Man of Steel to Silver Superman.

Study the symbiosis for Iron Man, and bring back the little Morgan from the zombie universe.

Thanos of the Family Planning Office by hand, the comic version of the old Thanos. Even big-headed doll space watchers have to ask me for help.

As for Infinity Gems Ultron? Can’t survive two chapters of e-waste.

The blackened Clark, the unknown black robe, the Celestial Group, and the Time Management Bureau fought all the way with their fists.

Many years later, Lin Feng held the Cosmic Cube in his left hand and the Fire Seed Source in his right.

What? Why do you say these two things are humanoid?

Hiss… It’s a bit long to say this…

- Description from novelbuddy