A Bored Lich - Chapter 341 - The Western Hallway: Part 1

I’m not your slave, you bastard! She’s furious! She’s furious! I’m furious! WE’RE BREAKING UP! She’s laughing like crazy! We’ll discuss this in a hundred years She was her ex boyfriend, mother hated down and out, but he praised her as treasure, when Tsenin, you want my heart, my life, I can give you at any time

Tong Yao never expected that getting a milk tea could result in getting struck by lightning on a sunny day, and then waking up in the 1980s. She became a mischievous, spoilt wife of a top-tier doctor from the future. Rather than leading an ordinary life, she was caught eloping and stealing money, and reacted with crying, making a fuss, and hitting walls.Under the hopeless circumstances, she discovered she could understand animal language. While other time-travelers were busy making money to support their families, she was just enjoying the show.“The deputy director's wife accepted five jins of pork from a patient's family. The old couple is squabbling behind closed doors right now.”“The Dean has had a flare-up of hemorrhoids these past few days and can't sit on a chair.”“Mr. Li's wife is a tough woman. That missing tooth on the left was knocked out by her.”“Tong Yao has improper conduct. She used to secretly meet people in the village.”Tong Yao didn't expect the day would come when she would be the talk of the town....One day, Tong Yao heard a stray cat at the door muttering, “Dr. Si is having a date with a nurse in the corridor.”Furious, Tong Yao went to catch them in the act, only to find the doctor was discussing a patient's condition with a nurse who was over fifty. Wanting to run away, Tong Yao found her escape route cut off by the doctor, who backed her against a wall, “So I heard you came to catch us, huh?”Tong Yao never expected the saying, 'Those who always walk by the river eventually get their shoes wet,' to come true.

Right after getting the first-class chef’s certificate and before that certificate had been in her hands long enough to warm up, she woke up. Not only did she age ten years, she also gained two children…

—

At this time, her new daughter, who had lost two of her front baby teeth and spoke with a lisp, pointed at the TV screen and called out, “Dad!”

On the screen, the Film Emperor Meng Yan was extremely handsome and charming. Towards the camera, his gaze was overflowing with gentle and tender feelings. He raised up the hand that was holding hands with captivatingly beautiful bride. She was wearing a diamond-beaded wedding dress. At the bottom of the TV screen, the headline news was displayed in large font – Meng Yan and the rising starlet’s wedding of the century.

T/N: The second part of the summary is misleading. This isn’t a novel where the transmigrated main character clings onto the film emperor’s thigh.

- Description from Novelupdates

“They Call Guys Like Me a Simp.”(Meanwhile, I’m out here living what their favorite MC only dreams about.)You ever notice how stories glorify the ones who feel nothing?The MC who never laughs.Never feels.Who plays women like chess pieces and calls it intelligence.He manipulates a girl? “He’s strategic.”He never opens up? “He’s mysterious.”He never flinches, never laughs, never lives —And you call that strength?Funny.Because to me?That’s just a prison in disguise.You see an “alpha.”I see a boy too scared to feel anything real.While they spend ten chapters monologuing about logic and sacrifice,I’m already making the Saintess scream,drenched in sin,halo cracked,legs trembling from truths her prayers never taught her.And I didn’t get there with cold eyes or control.I got there with laughter and chill. With warmth. With a grin and a hand on her thigh.I didn’t need to dominate her mind —I freed her heart.But that scares people, doesn’t it?Because readers trust the ones who suffer.Who stay quiet.Who kill without blinking and love without showing it.But me?I flirt.I laugh.I take hits and smile back, bloody and defiant, as if too weak to get angry.I don’t need to pretend emotions are weakness.I weaponize mine.Pleasure. Connection. Laughter.That’s my arsenal.And while your favorite MC is still calculating his next five moves,Trying to outwit death and romance like both are math problems,I’m already balls deep in the jade fairy — her sacred yin furnace clenching like it’s worshipping my shaft, her Dao Echo shattered into breathless moans, and her so-called cultivation path leaking down her thighs while she begs me to break her meridians again.You call that luck?Nah.That’s mastery of the three worlds.Because in a world that respects coldness,I came in hot.Where others manipulate, I connect.Where they posture, I play.Where they sacrifice, I seduce.So go ahead.Call me a simp.But while your genius MC is busy monologuing about destiny,I’m the one making goddesses question theirs —with a smirk, a touch, and no regrets.I’m not the hero.Not the villain.I’m just a simp… the kind who leaves your cold, emotionless MC’s woman dripping, ruined, and too stretched to go back to him.